Slimey Limey (Michael Tracey) $$$$$

ROFL! That train driver cost us a fortune!

 

Oh no, not so fast Mr KK....I managed to get her "Right to Die" papers revoked (I think your signing them three times and underscoring was a tad eager don't you?) so all is well.

"Gentleman, we can rebuild her...we have the technology"

This IS the Guttah...we specialise in spare parts down here. Why, I've got Chero sorting out all her bits as we speak and they will be shipshape and good as new in just a couple of hours.

Hey Ms Diva....your soul repose is OVER....

 

I can donate a pot belly and some eyebags if you're needing them - extra large.

Anyway -I think we should go ahead with the party - can't disappoint the hoodies. They were looking forward to a free-for-all afterwards.

Also, Batman wants to know what the boy's are to sing? And he said to let you know they have a special on just now - musical burping pigs. He says they do an almost recognisable "Abide with me". He can supply 7 although he says one of them has diarrhoeia but that if it stands right at the end, it shouldn't get on too many shoes when the guests are leaving.

 

Alright! The Diva will be SO PROUD of her new Scottish eye bags and pot belly...I'll take one of each....

Oh I couldn't agree more...the wake must go on. Burping pigs with diarrhoea will about be the pinnacle of taste. A true celebration and honouring of our dear diva...

 

Mr. koldkase here, again, since I will have to live with this do-over y'all have planned. Scottish eye bags and a pot belly? And Chero in charge, the Anal Retentive Mod? Not to worry about bagging eyes or bellies; she'll have Kasey stitched so tight, she won't be able to close her eyes and mouth at the same time. I guess Chero will be the best at getting all the parts put back together in order, though. One stringy tendon out of place and Chero will never rest.

But I will have to consult with my lawyers about you contesting the "Right to die" papers, Zotto. After all, 3 signatures is 3 times the legal security. And I've already spent the insurance. Who knew dating was so expensive these days?

Uh...about the pigs...I also have visited a spirit medium...and Kasey sent me a message for y'all:

:ghost: "NO PIGS!! SICK OR OTHERWISE!!"

siiiiiiiiigh Sounds just like her, doesn't it?

 

I'm not fooled Mr KK....I heard about the scuffle at the hospital when they had to wrench the scissors from your hands just as you were about to cut the ventilator cord.....missed it by "that" much didn't you? The Judge signed my petition in the nick of time.....

Anyway, I'd recognise that whinge anywhere...now open that lid and back away before things go pear-shaped. I know the opportunity was too good to miss and the nails and wood were just ready and waiting, but lets be realistic. The first place they'll look is under the new ensuite....

Think of it this way. By the time Chero has done her work, you'll thank us.....really.

 

Mr. Koldkase here again.

That hospital gossip is a dam* lie! I was only going to give Kasy a little hair trim. She looked so pitiful laying there with her parts all askew.

As for the "whinge", whatever THAT is, I'd never bury my beloved Kasey under the new addition. First, the crawl space is too low and I'd have to use a spoon. We do have a deceased pets section in the woods nearby though...NOT that I've thought of that, either!!

But yes, if the guttah's St. Crack Ho Miracle Hospital can bring my DIVA back to me, I will thank you, thank you, thank you. I'll send you a card.

I will have to break this to a long line of applicants who have responded to my "Personal Slave position available" ad, though. They're a frisky lot, and young, too! Maybe I can keep just one or two for a while, seeing as how the DIVA will take some healing time before she can get back to catering to my every need and whim. It's tough on me, though, as training these youngsters is taxing; good thing I kept the whips and chains.

Let me know when the party starts. I"ve heard you have some really hot crack ho's in the lot. Not that I'm anything but 100% faithful to my precious DIVA.

[pssssst Cherokee, are you doing a little liposuction with those nips and tucks?]

 

Mr. KK, here is the definition of "whinge."

whinge (hwnj, wnj) KEY

intr.v.
Chiefly British whinged , whing·ing , whing·es
To complain or protest, especially in an annoying or persistent manner.

ETYMOLOGY:
Dialectal alteration of Middle English whinsen, from Old English hwinsian

OTHER FORMS:
whinger (Noun), whinging·ly (Adverb)



In the UK, the phrase usually is "whinging and whining." Like "moaning and complaining." So I suppose Zotto has turned a verb into a noun, and said that she recognizes your specific form of "whinging."

 

Ahem...I believe that Zotto was referring to my WIFE'S particular form of whinging and whining, which she recognized from the spirit medium's channeling of the DIVA...just to keep the record straight.

And aren't you the poster who caused Kasey's train accident, anyway? Hm? It's a Republican v Democrat thing, right?

 

No WAY! I just told her it was the train coming - what she did after that was totally her own decision. I don't force anyone to see things my way. If she wants to wear an aluminum hat and wait for messages from outer space or Howard Dean, that's her own business.

:shutup:

 

Too late, the pigs are booked.

And Batman says if you don't hurry up and tell him what the boys are to sing, you'll have to take the default selection:-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ghd-xL5gAjc

 

Oh. My. God. That's the DIVA's favorite, being a Southern bred Belle, after all.

Can we get the six white horses, do you think? It would be so HER, she might just make her come-back rebirth on those horses, if Cherokee will quit fannying around and get her put back together before the Second Coming....

Speaking of the Second Coming...so like the Republicans to make excuses when they cause a train wreck....

Do you think the Batman Chorus can perform Mozart's Requiem while they're at it? The Diva so loved to play that while she was practicing her WORLD-CLASS pout....

 

Cherokee doesn't FANNY around with anything ... much less deceased decomposing divas. As a matter of fact, she has much more IMPORTANT things to attend to ... like keeping Jay and Zotto out of the funeral wine.

And, honey, that's a full-time job. :ducky:

 

I think "decomposing" is a tad harsh don't you? I mean, I'm sure I read somewhere that Boone's Farm was 99.9% enbalming fluid......in any case, do your best...we have an obligation to Mr KK. Barb's George will be happy to take care of any left over bits.

Jay, you've done an awesome job. It's going to be the best darn wake we've ever had here in the Guttah...and how on earth did you get Why-Nut to be the compere? Never mind...you've done it and that's all that matters. If all goes to plan, we'll see the unveiling and our beloved diva will be back amongst us as good as old.

Memo to Mr KK...it's REALLY not nice to let the new girls wear the Diva's clothes and jewelery just yet....

 

Nope. Reviving degenerate divas is not on my AGENDA.

Besides, I'm outta here. I got a better offer for this weekend ... a line-dance competition with wall-mounted, rotating Scotsmen.

:takeoff:

 

Righto then, we'll just have to take her piecemeal.

mutter mutter....I dunno...you try and delegate and you might as well do it yourself.....

 

Alright. Fine. Another Republican weighs in. No problem, Cherokee, the DIVA would not want to interfere with your Highland romp. Especially since the DIVA went and voted for a Republican just this week, right before her accident. It's not enough that one of her last acts was one of civic duty, no matter how low she had to go to perform it.... Well, nevermind, it's not important to some people....

So just forget it. The DIVA has sent me another message saying she likes it just fine in the otherworld. All the crack and oreos a ho can ask for. :cloud9: And she's certainly not going to traipse around the guttah with her parts falling all over the place.

Plus she said that since y'all have gone to so much trouble for the wake, she wouldn't want to ruin your fun.

But get that giant organ with player...she requested.

 

I knew it! That wench just plays fast and loose with my money. We are NOT
hiring the organ player!

In any case...your cloud lease runs out in exactly one hour so like it or not you are back with us....AND your dear dear hubby. He's SO looking forward to having you back in his loving ensuite again....

 

Gone for a while and we're planning a funeral????

By the way, Jayelles' excellent photo of the pink limo complete with "kippers" is from my favorite place:Coney Island, and right here in Brooklyn, NY. Who says we have no class in Brooklyn???? :curtsey:

I think the limo is missing long, pink pom poms and where are the pimps with the big hats????

I am willing to donate any facial hair I may have accumulated over the years and all saggy and baggy -------whatevers to the reconstruction of our KK

Why I would even be willing to sell my priceless Picasso knock offs to help with the expense of so much crack and oreos for the many guests I assume will be attending.

And, if anyone is concerned, yes, my George will be happy to eat any of the leftovers the gutter hos may leave over as well as their guttah guests

 

I hate to disallusion you, but politics has nothing to do with it. Cherokee is neither a Republican or a Democrat. She votes for whoever promises the best eats at the victory party.

And Barbara, my dear, just where the sam hill have YOU been? :hiya: