Susan Stine: Where is She Now? and The Patricia Letters

Yes, of course, and thank you so much!

 

Yes please, Niner. That's nice of you!

 

Jay, any guesses as to which hat could be Susan Stine? Anyone else?

What about Don Bradley? :-0

 

Nah - I think Toth is just Toth. I don't know who would be Susan Stine. Not sure if she'd have a regular hat or if she'd be one of these posters who pops up hither and yonder under different hats and posting different POVs.

However - I do think she's around. If she's still friendly with the Ramseys, she may have been missing during the period leading up to Patsy's death. If she was still (ahem) "devoted" to Patsy, then Patsy's death may have unhinged her a little.

Who knows?

 

Here's a post regarding those letters, April 2000:

here are some that I'm just copying from my Yahoo email account; I was going to clean them up, you know, the spacing and such, but that will take TOO much time! LOL!

Here ya go! Enjoy!

These were the very first ones I received.
Patti
Forwarded Message

Date: 19 Apr 1999 17:31:20 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: JonBenet

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dear Patti,

>I am curious about someone who would put JonBenet's gravesite
>picture on the WWW and claim to be a friend of the Ramsey's.

Thank you for your concern. I do not see anything wrong with
JonBenet's gravesite on that page. It is a tribute to her memory.
I also thought it important to also include Beth's gravesite as
well. Beth was a very special person as well.



Forwarded Message

Date: 20 Apr 1999 02:32:28 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: JonBenet's grave

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dear Patti,

I wish you would not be angry with me. I assure you that there
are others who deserve that much more than me. I answer the
remainder of this mail with all due respect to you. I am sorry
that you are upset about the tribute. Maybe I can clarify some
things here. Please do not perceive anything I say in a negative
way.

>I'm sorry, this whole grave thing seems weird to me.
>Very distasteful, in my opinion.

No, the tabloids that plaster JonBenet's face on the cover is
distasteful. The same pictures that gain a child's attention and
alert him to the lies that are plastered just below them; the
lies that have caused grief for this family. No, John Andrew
being chased through an airport by press photographers is
distasteful. No, film footage of Beth's accident being shown on
public television for her mother to see is distasteful.

Notice, there are no pictures of JonBenet on this page. The only
picture that should be allowed to be printed is a picture of her
grave. There is nothing distasteful about her grave. Unlike the
tabloids and other websites, I have nothing BUT permission to
create a tribute to JonBenet. My permission was gained
respectfully from my closeness to JonBenet. It was gained long
before her death.

In closing, I am sorry that you feel the way you do. Have you
written the tabloids about their pictures? Have you written to
the television, newspapers, and talk shows concerning their
mission to destroy this family? You've written to me. You've
expressed your disapproval of a simple tribute; no titillating
headlines captioned below my pictures. I am more sorry if you
think I am angry with you. I certainly am not.

My identity will remain anonymous. There is no real reason why my
address is there. It is the policy of the page to acknowledge the
contributor. The page has been nestled safely within his website
for almost a year now. That is one of the reasons I chose his
site for my tribute.

Thank you Patti. Best wishes to you. I am sorry if you feel I
have not expressed myself in anything but a peaceful and
respectful manner. I certainly have respect for your concern. It
looks quite different from my perspective. After all that has
been printed about JonBenet, and due to all the hurt it has
incurred, I feel a right to pay simple tribute to JonBenet. That
is only fair.

Best Wishes


Forwarded Message

Date: 21 Apr 1999 02:41:30 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Thank You

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

You seem like a really sweet person. I'm glad you understand my
intent better now. Maybe, as we continue to talk, you will
understand more. I certainly try make an effort to enable my
friends to understand everything.

I want to say, on behalf of this entire family, I deeply
appreciate that you do not believe her parents could have
commited such a horrible crime. This family has many friends, but
it is just as nice to know that others feel that the family is
innocent.

>I understand that you submitted 5 pictures for the web page,
>only three were used. Why is that?

Where did you hear that? I have sources who have told me that my
page is being discussed on a particular radio talk show. I'm not
sure how I feel about that. I definitely don't want the media to
start quoting my mail, hence, the purpose of this shroud of
secrecy.

>Do the Ramsey's know this is on the Internet?

Yes

>Surely you can't mean the permission was gained long before her
>death. you must mean your closeness to JonBenet was gained long
>before her death.

My meaning was deeper than I might have expressed in words. You
are closer to its true meaning.

>Also I do not understand why you chose to not be identified. If
>you are firm in your belief that this picture has a right to be
>on the Internet why are you hiding behind a cloak of mystery?

In time, I might reveal myself to certain individuals I
encounter; people I am assured are not an enemy to this family,
and have no intention to forward my words to the press.

>Half of the problems of solving this case are due to the mystery
>within the mystery, It has to end in order for this case to have
>some closure.

It is quite different on this end. This family feels that most of
the problems exist because the media twists every word spoken.
The media has gone so far as to analyze emotional responses. The
close scrutiny and distortion of the media was the beginning of
the end. Of course, the conduct of the Boulder Police was what
touched off the lack of communication. I have said this many
times, we're damned if we do and damned if we don't. In other
words, speaking is damning, while keeping silent is damning;
beause every word is twisted. It finally reaches a point where
all is said and explained until the words cannot be twisted,
instead, they are discounted as lies.

>I thought someone was just trying to capitalize on this poor
>little girl's death. So many people are doing that and it makes
>me ill.

Thank you for your feeling. Words cannot express my total
agreement.

>You have gone to great lengths to insure your identity is not
>revealed. That tells me more than you think it does.

Tell me what it tells you.

>I would like to continue to exchange views about the case with
>you, if you are willing. Even if you chose not to reveal your
>identity. Which, I have to tell you, puts me in a really odd
>position, but heck, I have been in odd positions many times!

I think we are going to become great friends. I already
appreciate your opinion concerning the innocence of this family.

>I am sick to death of talking to people on the Internet about
>this case who try to convince me the Ramsey's did it. Finding
>people like myself, who do not think John and Patsy did it, are
>hard to find.

Close friends in real life still have faith in this family. The
majority of people in America probably feel differently. It is
refreshing to talk to someone who believes in this family. Thank
you.

>What am I saying, for all I know you think they did it.

Patti, I know, for a fact, that no one in the Ramsey family was
responsible for her death. She was so important to this family. I
would love to tell you more about her and about this family.

>Thanks for sharing your thought with me thus far.

Thank you for listening and being polite. You do know that I get
plenty of hate mail. I answer it all.

Much More Later,
Your Friend

Forwarded Message

Date: 21 Apr 1999 16:05:11 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: More About The Ramsey Family

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

Nice to hear from a friend. In response to your concern of the
Ramsey family, they are all doing very well, in light of the
grand jury session. It is difficult to go on with life as usual
with all the media hype over the possibility that an innocent
mother will be indicted.

>If you are who I think you are, you already know all about WROW.

And who do you think I am?

Allow me to tell you what everyone else has thought. Some have
thought I am a killer; hiding behind a safe wall. A killer who
would fittingly post a picture of a grave. Others think I am a
friend of the Ramseys. After all, that is the title that
represents the address. Then there are others who think I am the
Ramseys themselves. Oddly, the only Ramsey they think me is,
Patricia. The most interesting theory I've heard to date
indicating that I am, indeed, Patricia; came from a man who has
turned me every which way but loose. He feels he has developed
software that can analyze writing styles and attach them to
people. He is very certain that his software has linked my
writing to that of things Patricia has written before, hence, he
is convinced that he has proven my identity to be Patricia
Ramsey.

I claim to be no one. If someone gets close to my identity, I
find myself evading the slightest possibility that they are close
to an answer. Let me explain that I do not do this to make the
recipient suffer confusion. I do this because I do not trust. All
the hate campaigns against this family are intimidating, to a
degree. They are intimadating, not because their theories hold
any validity, but because they are based mostly on words that
have been said by members of this family, that have been twisted
to satiate the sick appetites of those who insist that JonBenet's
mother could have carried out such a horrible act.

I do feel a tremendous urge to communicate with people who do not
know me, yet feel confident that this family is innocent. I admit
that I also allow people to say sharp words to me that cut like a
knife. I guess I think they should point their words to my face
instead of spouting them to my back. The hate is sometimes
intertwined with obsessive love. In either case, I am overwhelmed
by questions that I will never have the ability to answer.

You are correct in saying that I wanted to give tribute to
JonBenet in a place that is not saturated by media hype. I
pondered over allowing any method of communication with the
public. I pondered over the posting of JonBenet's gravesite and
Beth's gravesite. I tried hard to word the captions so as not to
point to my identity. Have you also seen Beth's tribute? It is in
a different section of the same page.

The main reason I placed these very innocent pictures on a very
safe and unpublished website, was to create a forum to talk about
JonBenet; to grieve her loss and express my love for her.

No, I do not read the forums you mentioned. The few television
and other forms of media I have viewed, concerning the case, have
mostly been accidental. It is impossible for me not to see the
glaring photos on the tabloids as I check out at the store. By
the way, no one has ever gained permission to print those
distasteful blow-ups of JonBenet. I wonder if any mother knows
the pain of seeing their deceased daughter in such a fashion.

>The absolute ONLY way I would share your email with the press
>would be if you turn out to be the killer.

I may not tell you who I am, but I can easily tell you who I am
not; I am not JonBenet's killer. Regardless of that, many are
following me here with the firm belief that I am a killer. Most
of those contend that I am a murderous mother.

I think the irony of my need to remain anonymous and my need to
have my words kept from the press, lies in the fact that: these
words are probably the very words that SHOULD be printed. These
are the very feelings that SHOULD be seen by the enemies of this
family. The whole matter of having my words possibly printed has
caused me great confusion. At this time, this family does not
need anymore words twisted. On the other hand, my words here are
just as deserving to be heard as those that place blame on this
family. Sometimes, I dream of a day when I can speak, the people
will listen, and all will understand and believe me. I have no
faith left. My trust is virtually gone, yet I exhibit some degree
of trust by merely talking to a few through this correspondence.

I hope to speak to you soon. I beg you to pardon me from
answering every part of your mail. Some people become very angry
with me when I evade them. With you my dear, maybe soon will come
my name.

Thank You


Forwarded Message

Date: 21 Apr 1999 23:07:49 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Deep Sigh

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Patti,

I am not this person you refer to as "Jameson". I didn't recall
you asking me that in the past mail.

>You surely understand that this is difficult for me to
>communicate with someone under these conditions.

Please elaborate on that.

>You have used the word HENCE twice. Did you think I did not
>notice. Is that your way of dropping me a hint as to who you
>are? I think it is, but then again I think you may be someone
>trying to make me THINK that you are Patsy when you are not.

Please Patti, I hope you aren't going to start analyzing my every
word. I did not notice I used that word at all. I was just
relaxing and writing a nice letter; I can only pledge to do that
and nothing more. If, by chance, I type that word again, it is to
alert you of nothing. It is merely a word I have always used.

>If you are Patsy, let me say this to you. I do not believe you
>hurt your child. I believe you have a good idea who did it
>though but for some reason you can not come forth with that
>information.

Your response is appreciated. I have said this before to you,
however, it cannot be said enough. I assure you that you are
correct in your assumption that JonBenet's mother did not harm
her in any way.

>I am sure she is aware that there are very FEW of us who believe
>in her innocence and it may brighten her day just a little to
>know that a believer is exists.

It is nice to know that there are others, besides close friends
of the family, who believe in the innocence of a mom who adored
her precious little girl. There could not have been a closer
relationship between a mother and her daughter. Moreover, true
friendship is another precious thing that a mom and her daughter
can share; JonBenet and her mother were best friends.

>do you get a lot of mail off the website with the grave?

Not really.

>How long has it been on line?

It has been there for several months.

>>>He feels he has developed software that can analyze writing
>>>styles and attach them to people.

>Is this man Donald Foster? and look, right there you used the
>word HENCE when saying he thought you were Patsy.

He is not Donald Foster. Again, I refuse to watch every word I
write. I will continue to write as I have always written.

>What are you trying to tell me?

I hope to only tell you how I feel about JonBenet and how I feel
about her loss. I have no intention to tell you anything more.

>If I find out you are some idiot messing with me, I will be VERY
>VERY ed off. You realize that don't you?

Believe me, I have heard much more offensive words than this. You
would be shocked at some of the mails I have received. You have
every right to write this to me. With all due respect, I am not
"an idiot messing with you".

>you have no reason not to trust me, I am on your side, remember?
>But you put me in a most difficult position.

I am sorry that I have made you uncomfortable. It was not my
intention. If it continues, tell me and we will go from there.

>I said damned if they do, and damned if they don't. you had said
>that in a letter to me and it stuck in my head. I had thought it
>myself, many many months ago.

That is just an old expression that my mother used to say:
"Damned if you do and damned if you don't". My mom is not the
type to let anyone push her around. She is known for saying
exactly what is on her mind. I feel the saying is highly
appropriate as it relates to the distortion of every word that
proceeds from the mouths of a Ramsey; especially if you happen to
be John or Patricia Ramsey.

>>>>I guess I think they should point their words to my face
>>instead of spouting them to my back

>How is this possible, since no one knows who you are?

But some people seem certain of who I am.

>Yes I have seen the tribute to Beth. I wanted to ask you
>something about that,also. What part of Illinois was she killed
>in? I am from Illinois, that is why I ask.

Beth and Matthew were killed near Chicago.

>You wonder if any mother knows the pain of seeing this? that is
>odd, of course there is a mother who knows this pain. Patsy
>Ramsey knows this pain. Again, you have me confused.

I don't understand why it is confusing to wonder if any other
mother knowns the agony of having her daughter's pictures
plastered across the front pages of tabloids.

>I do not believe you are the killer. Patsy or otherwise.

Therefore, my mission to remain anonymous has proven successful.

>>>>Sometimes, I dream of a day when I can speak, the people
>>will listen, and all will understand and believe me.

>i think I can help you accomplish this goal. You need to trust
>me though, the same as I am trusting you.

Oh that would be wonderful, Patti. Tell me how we can do this?

>I am anxiously awaiting to hear form you soon,

I enjoy hearing from you. I am so sorry about this shroud of
secrecy; however, it is better than being inundated with
questions and accusations. Rest assured, I am not saying you
would do this to me. You are a kind soldier in the fight to
defend this family. Your efforts are appreciated.

Silently Grieving


Forwarded Message

Date: 24 Apr 1999 18:03:10 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: I'm Back

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Dearest Patti,

I am sorry for not writing. I've been out of my home for the past
several days. I have also been having reservations about talking
in this arena. My level of trust for anyone, past my immediate
family and my closest friends in real life, is little to none.

I went to the Colorado site and signed it. When I refreshed the
page, I could not see my name, hence, I think it did not work
properly.

I do not have your past mails to refer to, as I am on a different
computer. My memory fails me on many occasions. I will try to
recall everything. I rather like to quote your messages instead.
I do recall you mentioning the relaying of answers, from me to
you, concerning JonBenet's life and death, on the forums. I was
very tempted to try to enter one of those forums, but I lost my
nerve. My deep concern of having someone attempting to find out
my identity and then stalking me or worse, kept me away.

I don't especially have anything against your idea; I only wish
there was a way to reach more people through a more preferable
avenue. The Internet is a vast place. I would imagine that
responding to forums would go unknown by the majority of the
people in the world. Maybe you know something that I do not know.

I suppose you have given up on hearing from me. I have stopped
receiving mail from you, however, I think it is I who have
stopped writing to you. I also suffer some depression. During
those times, I do not feel like talking to anyone past my family
and a few friends in real life. Even that is difficult at times.

Please forgive any omissions I might have made in my feable
attempt to answer your mails. I did not want to wait to respond
to you when I returned to that computer.

Your Friend


Forwarded Message

Date: 24 Apr 1999 21:46:19 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: A Response

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Dearest Patti,

Isn't Patti short for Patricia?

>But, you know, there is a doubt. Even if you told me that you
>were john, Patsy or anyone else in the family, I would not have
>anyway of confirming that.

I would never tell you if I am a member of the Ramsey family,
hence, you have no reason to worry about confirming it. I would
never allow anyone to get close enough to me to reach the
confirmation stage.

>Also, not knowing if you are male or female is a bit
>uncomfortable for me. Not that it matters, it just feels weird,
>like I am writing to a ghost or something! LOL! that would be
>cool, I love the UNKNOWN.

I thought my writing style was very revealing of what sex I am.
Most people have no problem deciding whether I am male or female.
Those who think I am a love sick killer, believe me to be male.
Those who are convinced that I am JonBenet's mother say it is
obvious that I am female, from my writing style alone. You seem
to believe in ghosts. Do you believe in angels? I believe in
angels.

>So who do you think did this horrible crime. Surely you must
>have a theory. Are you ready to share this with me so that we
>can discuss it?

My closest circle of friends and family believe in a retaliatory
theory, based around a person who has a score to settle with
John. I think the killer might be an old business relation of
John's from Atlanta. I am referring to the time before the move
to Boulder. The ransom note is written to John and refers to him
being from the south. Of course, there were many in Boulder who
knew he was from Atlanta, prior to moving to Boulder. I guess I
always thought people thought John was from Michigan, in Boulder.
I have a few ideas about the killer. By the way, I have received
a confession letter through this address.

>Maybe between the two of us and our ideas we can come up with
>something. Wouldn't it be great to find that one little thing
>that proves Patsy and John are innocent. Oh and Burke, too. I
>CAN NOT BELIEVE there are "Burke theories" out there! that is
>simply absurd!! I have a 9 year old son and there is NO WAY this
>was done by a boy of 9 years old! that is outrageous.

The methods used to torture JonBenet to death should point to the
killer's personality, and background in the art of torture. No 9
year old boy could know those things. The wildest accusation is
that JonBenet's mother killed her for wetting the bed. Why would
a mom do such elaborate things to her daughter? JonBenet was not
just killed; she was killed using torture techniques known only
by those who are experienced in the field.

>you said you get a lot of hate mail, I don't understand this. If
>it is not from the gravesite pictures, where does it generate
>from?

Most all of it generates from the gravesite pictures.

>Tell me about JonBenet. What was she like?=20

JonBenet was an exciting, intelligent, beautiful child. She lit
up every room she entered. She was a caring little Mommy. She
loved life and loved playing. She was care-free. One of her most
unique personality traits was her ability to say things you would
expect to hear only from an adult. She wanted everything to be
wonderful, and everybody to be happy. It was impossible to be sad
around her. Her teacher was impressed with her intelligence. I
was impressed with every facet of that wonderful child. I loved
her more than this world will ever know.

>All over the Internet, it is being said that the pineapple was
>eaten 2 hours before death. If you know for a fact this is a
>lie, I can argue the point

I made someone angry with my answer to that question. My response
to him was this: "I am sorry, but I have no idea whether JonBenet
ate pineapple that night, due to the fact that I was not by her
side all night that night." JonBenet did not stay in one spot for
very long at a time. I got a frustrated response from the asker.
In that case, I was damned because I could not answer.

I went through the archives of my mail server to find this mail.
I am still not at my home computer. I am not at my home to be at
my computer. Where are you from?

Wishing I Could Sign My Name....

Forwarded Message

Date: 28 Apr 1999 04:13:43 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: Hi

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Dear Patti,

For two days, I have not received any mail. I think my server has
been down. I did receive a mail from you tonight alerting me that
you may not be getting mail.

I live in Atlanta. It's like home to me, in many ways. I've lived
here and left. For some reason, I keep returning. My family lives
here.

I don't have your mails handy to refer to. I think my mail server
has not given my mail to me lately. I thought I should touch
bases with you.

Your Friend



Forwarded Message

Date: 29 Apr 1999 00:29:59 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: Bennett

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Dear Patti,

How are you? I thought I would address the Sue Bennett question.
I would like for you to tell me what she is doing and how you
found out about her.

My comment is as follows: Shirley Brady worked with Burke and
JonBenet as well. She has no knowledge of who killed JonBenet.
Friends of the family had daughters who sat for JonBenet. For
instance, Pamela Griffin's daughter babysat for JonBenet. She has
no idea who killed her. Several people have spent a few
hours watching JonBenet and Burke, yet none of them have any
knowledge of who killed her. My point is this; if this Sue
Bennett babysat for Burke, how does that give her an inside scoop
on who killed JonBenet? Tell me more about her. As John has said
before, maybe she just wants her 15 minutes of fame. I would like
for her to write to me here.

I've lost many of my e-mail friends because they hate my style of
answering questions. I hope you don't start feeling that way. I
answer questions as careful as possible. I must do it that way to
avoid having my words twisted.


Forwarded Message

Date: 29 Apr 1999 21:02:15 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: Wars and Rumors of Wars

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Hi,

I was going through my daily hate mail and come across your mail.
I hope to clarify some things.

>If John says this Sue Bennett is looking for her 15 minutes of
>fame then I take it he has heard about her but never met her. AM
>I correct?

No. I did not say he said that about Sue Bennett. I simply made
reference to it.

>She has a TIMELINE, have you seen it?
>http://members.tripod.com/~jamesons/

I am confused now. Is Jameson also known as Sue Bennett?

>She is the most hated person on the Internet. I am going to
>paste and copy you the most current remarks someone said about
>her, I am deleting thepersons name.

Good to see other people get hate mail besides me. All mine comes
just from posting JonBenet's gravesite. I never say a word.

>I have to tell you right now I am uncertain what to think, I
>suspect that YOU may be Jams, you know that, she would pull
>something like this.

This statement hurts me. I told you that I am not that person.
The most hurtful thing you said suggests that I am "pulling
something".

>If you are NOT Jams, and you are a friend of the Ramsey's I
>suggest you get someone to stop Jams form the damage she is
>doing.

Shall I add the host of others who are damaging the family? The
list is long.

I need to clarify something here. I have no desire to try to
vanquish every person who is against this family. It would take
several lifetimes to do that. What good would it do? I just
wanted to post a few pictures of JonBenet's grave, in opposition
to the huge amount of photos of her posted on the front of
tabloids and websites. I am passive. I have allowed people to
talk to me like I am nothing here. I would like to forward some
letters to you that are so hateful, you would not believe it.
Now, I get mail that blasts me for the mere posting of pictures
of her grave. Most people would have stopped writing long ago,
but I am long on patience. I am concerned about the lies. I am
mostly concerned for Melinda, John Andrew, and Burke. They are
just starting out. I've already had a wonderful life up until the
murder of JonBenet. If my life ended tomorrow, I would just got
to be with JonBenet and Beth. Patti, it hurts me when people
accuse me of things and curse me. It hurts me when the children
in this family hear these lies; knowing they have many years to
endure this. However, there is little I can do at this point. If
I raged a battle on the Internet against my enemies, within a few
days, the press would be on top of me twisting my words. I have
stopped answering hateful mail. I got one while I was typing this
to you. It was from a lady who talked to me like I am a criminal
just because I posted the pictures. I did not have to say
anything to her to cause her hate. As you can see, I am writing
to you. I will continue to write to you as long as you're kind. I
appreciate your concern. I can assure you that if I got on your
forum, personally, I would be taken apart. I have already
experienced that; it hurts. I am just tired. I am tired of this
hate. I'm tired of all the attention the vicious public and press
are giving to this case; moreover, to this family. Maybe I should
go to your forum. You could then see how people respond to me. It
is uncalled for. I'm not going to subject myself to it anymore.

Take Care



Forwarded Message

Date: 30 Apr 1999 03:38:45 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: More

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

>Do you get the feeling that .....follow this closely...that I
>know who you are and that we both know why you can't
>say I AM XXXXX. ........

Wow.... I feel kind of rediculous about the identity issue. I
find it strange that I have been suspected of being JonBenet's
mom, her killer, a friend of the family; everyone but her father,
John.

>We will just drop the Jams thing for now.

Thank you. I do not wish to talk of her.

>I can not imagine how the Ramsey's manage to hold back their
>emotions when they read lies about themselves in the rag mags
>and on TV. LEEZA show tomorrow is about Patsy. Don't they just
>want to scream and lash out?

It would do no good. It would only cause more problems.

>There were things in Schiller's book that I found hard to
>believe and I tried to imagine how the Ramsey's could read them
>and not respond to it!

Maybe we are not reading anything.

>For example, will they not watch Leeza tomorrow, knowing they
>are the topic? I couldn't do that! I would have to watch, then I
>would also have to comment, of course!

If that program pops up on a television in this house, it will be
accidental.

>>>I have allowed people to talk to me like I am nothing here.

>WHY DO YOU DO THAT?? Stand up for yourself! I can see no reason
>why you shouldn't say what you want to say, heaven knows
>everyone else does it!

I would like to send you a sample.

>And how can you stop it without speaking out? it is going to get
>worse once the Grand Jury hands down an indictment.

That is what attorneys are for. No judge or jury in this land
will admit the fuming and bickering on the Net as anything
relevant to this case. I have never had a desire to fight anyone.

>You seem to be depressed and very very tired. Have you thought
>of distancing yourself from this for a while?

I think you are right. Maybe we could focus on the matter at
hand; the reason I wanted to talk to people from that site, the
loss of JonBenet.

>I get so excited when I see mail from you. You seem to be the
>only person I can talk to that isn't jumping at me with "facts"
>about why I should think the Ramsey's are guilty.

That is so sweet. That makes me feel really special. In real
life, I have many friends. On the Internet, my friends are few. I
am glad you like talking to me. I feel the same. I wonder what
your forums would do to me. You didn't respond to that one. I
hope to hear from you soon.

JonBenet's Friend (what I should have put on the site address)
And Patti's Friend

Forwarded Message

Date: 30 Apr 1999 03:48:37 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: Pushing?

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I have NEVER posted to a forum on the Internet and NEVER will. I
did notice once, that Marc Klaas posted to a forum once that was
sensationalizing his daughter's death. I found that unique. I am
not "pushing" to do anything but talk about JonBenet and the
tremendous grief I feel right now.

Your Friend


Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: "Midnite" <bgraves@lcc.net>
Subject: May 1-11th letters
Date: Fri, 1 Oct 1999 22:19:18 -0500

HTML Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Here are some more........
Forwarded Message

Date: 1 May 1999 16:38:06 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Here to Help

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Hi,

I haven't heard from you since your mail concerning Leeza. Must
have been a real winner. I also never got a response to my mail
to you. May I suggest you archive, as my mail server is very
undependable at times. Then, I guess you are waiting for me to
answer all those questions. I do wish you would still respond to
my last mail.

Now, about your friend's dilemma with A&E.... I would advise her
to secure a good attorney who has knowledge of entertainment law;
contracts, releases, etc. She DOES have recourse in this matter
for two reasons: releases and the fact that her child is a minor.
Unfortunately, look at all the pictures and press revolving
around JonBenet. Let me tell you that, after her death, there
have been little or no permission acquired to use her image or
the like. The media has shown total disrespect to her family by
plastering her image all over the place, furthermore, captioning
her pictures with vicious lies about her family. Why don't you
tell your friend to write to me here. I'd be glad to be a
supportive friend. She might be disappointed that I will not talk
pageants with her, but I would be glad to help her otherwise. A&E
did us a great favor once. I'm disappointed, especially at Bill
Kurtis of all people.

Now, about the questions.... I receive a host of questions each
day. Some people are very violent with their approach, especially
when I don't answer them. You see, the grand jury has still not
indicted anyone. The case remains under investigation. I'm not at
liberty to disclose such information, at the advice of my
attorneys. That is something that angers some people to no end.
Why is it that people think the Ramseys are not entitled to the
same right to be represented by legal counsel as the rest of the
citizens of the U.S.?

And so, I suppose you might find that disappointing. I did not
come here to answer questions that might damage this family. I
DID come here to talk about JonBenet and the family, in general.
I did not come here to argue or fight with some of the people who
encounter me. I did not come here to prove that I am any
particular person. On the contrary, once I assume someone is
close to my identity, I will launch a diversionary tactic that
will dismiss any such assumption. Why, you may ask? I will not
compromise the privacy of this family nor have my words twisted
by some person in the media.

With you only, I would like to share certain things. I might
sometimes sound like a New York lawyer; posting disclaimers that
protect my identity, but I would enjoy just sharing a few things
about myself and this family. I can see that I have made a few
slips and typographical errors in my correspondences with you.
I'll try to be more careful in the future.

I hope to hear from you someday soon. Take care and thank you for
your loyalty so far.

A Friend
***

more to come...

 

some more...

Date: 3 May 1999 21:51:57 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Patti, why are you doing this?

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dear Patti,

Listen, I told you I am not Jameson. No, I did not know who that
was until you told me she was aka Sue Bennett. Of course I know
who Sue Bennet is. I just did not know she also called herself
Jameson. Why are you suddenly being so mean to me? I have been
nothing but kind to you.

In case you have decided to get wise and expose me for a fraud or
a "dangerous killer" (which does not apply), you might save your
breath with the following people. They all have know me and have
possession of the address, ramsey@alias.nym.net:

Boulder District Attorney
Boulder Police
Donald and Nedra Paugh
The Ramsey Family
Crime Stoppers

I thought you were my friend. Instead, you have threatened me, in
regards to my revealing my identity. You've made mention that I
might be dangerous. I ask you, if I am dangerous, and the above
people are aware of me, why am I talking to you and not in jail
right now? You need leave well enough alone. Although, I have
sent you nice mails, you are doing this to me. You are angry with
me because I will not tell you I am Patricia Ramsey and did not
answer your questions. Don't you think that is a bit rediculous?
I told you from the beginning, I will not tell you who I am. Why
do I have to tell you my name? You assured me that you were not
interested in trying to uncover my identity. Why, suddenly are
you threatening me with this?

So go tell the world how much you hate a person you don't even
know. I have already been talked about on public radio talk
shows. People like Charlie Brennan would love to know about this
address. If you want to join the crowd in a hate campaign against
this family, go ahead and stab me in the back. It won't be the
first time. Why do you think I do not trust? Why do you think I
watch every word I say here? Because people turn on me and feed
my words to the hungry wolves to be twisted and used to hurt this
family. I'm not mad at you, Patti. I'm hurt. I thought you were
different. Can't we work this out and be friends again?



Forwarded Message

Date: 4 May 1999 01:34:11 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Stop

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

Stop yelling at me. Stop being rude to me. Stop accusing me of
being Sue Bennett. I am not Sue Bennett. Do you understand? I
have not been yelling at you using exclamation points and using
dirty words. If you are only enraged because you think I am this
Jameson person, you can stop being so angry now. I am not her.
What do I have to do to prove to you that I am not this Bennett
person? I should not have to do anything.

You said I might be a dangerous person. I was responding to that
in my last mail. I don't like fighting with you and I do not
deserve your insults. Quite frankly, it is making feel ill. I
hear your disrespect loud and clear. You have established that
you have nothing for me. Please stop.

I guess you will blast me for this, but you made me so nervous, I
made a typographical error, by stating the Boulder Police have
this address. They do not. I meant to type the Haddon/Morgan law
firm in that place. Actually, the Boulder police would be the
last people I would want to have my address.

No, I don't want people like Brennan to have my address. Stop
putting words in my mouth. Stop accusing me of things I did not
say.

>From the beginning, I told you I did not want to divulge my
identity. Thank God I did not, now that I have seen this side of
you. The side that wants to attack me and twist my words. Join
the club, Patti. You are in good company.

Would it make you happy if I told you I was a member of the
Ramsey family? Would you believe me if I gave you my phone number
here in Atlanta and let you call me? You wouldn't believe me if I
did so why bother. The scary thing about this is, I came so close
to telling you who I am. Thank God I didn't.




Forwarded Message

Date: 4 May 1999 02:46:18 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: A Little About Atlanta / Please Read Carefully

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I am not that great with street names but I will try to give you
a picture of the Atlanta area as best I can. I think you will be
convinced that I live here. Please read this carefully?

I will proceed to take you up Roswell Road. To get to Roswell Rd.
and Northridge Road, I have to get on I-285 and travel to the
Sandy Springs / Roswell Road exit #17. I sometimes exit at Powers
Ferry Landing and go up Powers Ferry Road and take a left on Mt
Paran until it dead ends into Roswell Road. There is a realty
business dead ahead. It used to be a residential house. I can
then take a left to go toward Roswell or right to go to Buckhead
and downtown. If I turn left on Roswell, there was once a Chi
Chi's Mexican restaurant on the left on Roswell Road. It is not
called that now. I can't recall it's name now. There are real
estate buildings everywhere on Roswell Road. There is a brand new
post office with poor service off Roswell Road. You can turn
right off Roswell Road, right after Happy Gas, and get to
Northside Hospital. There is a great ski shop on that road. Right
at the I-285 and Roswell Road intersection, there is a tall
building about 11 stories tall with a sign that reads
"Newberger/Andes". They are commercial developers. Across the
road, there is a tall real estate building. It is white in color.
There are a smattering of night spots on both sides of the road
on Roswell, just above I-285. Up from there, K-Mart is on the
left. Just past K-Mart, at the intersection, there is a Burger
King on the left and a service station just across that. One road
that crosses Roswell Road, at this point, is Hammond Drive. There
is a park called Hammond park and you can take that road as a
shortcut to Perimeter Mall, another great place to shop). The
alternate route to Perimeter Mall is on I-285, exit 21
Ashford/Dunwoody Road. Up Roswell Road, on the left, there is a
Starbuck's with great coffee. Roswell Road is really not my
immediate area but I know more about it than I thought I did.

My family and I often shop at Cumberland Mall. Oh, I can't forget
to mention the beautiful Galleria Mall. It is close to
Cumberland. Cumberland Mall is located on hwy 19/41. It is easy
to access from Marietta. Sometimes, I feel like going to
Buckhead. When I do, I shop at Lenox Square. It has changed so
much since I lived here before. The Marta train has a station
right behind Lenox Square Mall.

When I am in that area, I can take the Georgia 400 to Roswell
(the city). If I exit to I-285, I can exit off on the Sandy
Springs exit to get on Roswell Road. While on GA 400, if I exit
before I-285, on Lenox Road, I don't have to pay a toll. It is a
toll road, you know. I might visit the Paugh residence if I go up
GA 400 to Roswell (the city). It is easy to get to, since they
live down and to the left of Roswell High School. Brookfield West
is a nice neighborhood.

Tower Place is in Buckhead. It has scattered shops at its base,
where I like to eat. Tower Place is a tall building across from
the Kroger store. When I lived here before, there was a night
spot across the road called, "The Lime Light". It has been gone
for years. Your Jameson person would not know that.

When I am on Roswell road, coming from Buckhead and entering into
Sandy Springs, to get to I-75, which leads to Marietta and to
I-285, I take a shortcut through a winding road called Mount
Paran Road. At the end of this road is the Mount Paran Church of
God. Haven't you ever heard of Mylon Lefevre (mispelled that
name)? I can take a right here and go back to Cumberland Mall. I
can keep going up 19/41 and I am in Marietta, passing the Big
Chicken. What is the Big Chicken? It is a landmark in Marietta.
It is a huge chicken with a beack that opens and closes; a
Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant.

Oh yeah, I-285 is a circle around the city. Here in Atlanta, we
call this "the perimeter". You either live inside the perimeter
or outside the perimeter. Roswell is a city and also a road. The
city of Roswell is reached fastest by GA 400, depending on where
you are located.

I can go on and on because I live in Atlanta. I have left here
and returned. I can remember things that were here before. There
has been a lot of development since I was here before. Atlanta is
a great place to live.



Forwarded Message

Date: 4 May 1999 20:00:16 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Friends

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I hope you received my lengthy description of Atlanta. I have not
received a response yet. I was hoping it would discount any doubt
that I live in Atlanta.

Also, I did give you any names that I did not want you to give
this address to. Are you referring to Charlie Brennan and the
Boulder police? On the other hand, I DID give you the names of
people who know me and have possession of this address. That list
inlcuded a host of people from Nedra Paugh to Bryan Morgan.

Patti, thank you for going to such great lengths about the
pineapple. I appreciate it. Like I told you, I appreciate
everything you have ever done for the Ramsey family. JonBenet
loved every member of this family. She would not have wanted
anyone in her family to suffer like this. When you defend her
family, you defend her.

I like you as well. I am not trying to make you be my friend. I
have many friends in real life. They have been great. I guess I
just can't stand for anyone to feel any bad feelings toward me or
anyone else in the Ramsey family. I also respect that you have
defended the family.




Forwarded Message

Date: 5 May 1999 02:18:35 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: My theories

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I suppose you got my mail about Atlanta.

>I tried to contact Don Paugh once from a yahoo search I did
>which resulted in a name address and email for him. He responded
>that he was not the Don Paugh who is Patsy's father. I thought
>that was rather rude of him.

What address was that? I will tell you if it is correct.

>Is Patsy nervous about the buzz that she will be arrested this
>week? The one I really feel sorry for is Burke,he is getting a
>bad deal all around.

That is just more of the same. One can't get any more nervous
than they already have been. The only thing we can hope for now
is justice and the protection of the rights of members of this
family by legal counsel. It would not be a surprise if an arrest
is made.

>Wish I could do something to help.

I thank you.

I will say that I believe the killer is in Atlanta. I think he
was a business acquaintance of John's. I love Pamela but I do not
believe in the retaliatory theory. I think the person who killed
JonBenet was a sick and twisted individual who was sexually
obsessed with her. I think he stalked her for a short time. I
think he DID approach her and talked to her prior to her death. I
have learned a little more about the bizarre practices of certain
people through the correspondences of this address. Some have
described in detail, how they killed JonBenet. Though it can be
discounted as a lie, it is a flipside, in contrast with all the
theories so far. I do think he possibly had business dealings
with John that went all the way to Boulder or possibly, stayed
here in Atlanta.

Because of my above theory, I have been accused of being this
business connection with John. After all, I live in Atlanta. I
have had my writing supposedly analyzed by software that matches
the ransom note. It also matches the writing style of Patricia
Ramsey but that does not prove I am either. Anyway, who knows the
validity of some stranger's writing style analysis software?

I should have had the caption "Friend of JonBenet" on that
webpage instead of "Friend of the Ramseys".




Forwarded Message

Date: 5 May 1999 13:14:20 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Hi

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

>The address I have for Don Paugh is lost. it was something like
>don_paugh@yahoo.com or donaldpaugh@yahoo.com the street address >I
have for them is 865 Brooksglen Dr Roswell, GA 30075-1365

You have the home address right. I mentioned their neighborhood,
Brookfield West, in my e-mail to you, concerning the directions all over
Atlanta. Hope you read that part. They have a beautiful home. Have you seen
it? I have photos, of course. I doubt they will answer any mail
concerning this case. They once placed a note on the welcome wreath on their
door that read, "No Comment". I suppose you know all this.

>About your theory, can it been checked out, does John think this
>person is the killer too? Why can't it be proven? Is John afraid
>of this person and what he might do? How do you imagine this
>person has managed to not leave ONE MINUTE clue as to his
>identity? Do you think John's investigators will uncover
>something soon? I sure hope so.

Yes, the family is afraid to some degree. Mostly the Ramseys are
concerned for their child and the children of others. Everything John has
ever touched, turns to gold, which might breed jealousy among those
closely or distantly working with John. That was only one of many theories. I
also pointed out that I believe a total stranger to John might have
done this; a stalker and child killer.

>>I should have had the caption "Friend of JonBenet" on that
>>webpage instead of "Friend of the Ramseys".
>
>Yes I think that would have been better, you would probably get
>as much mail though.

I don't care about the mail I get. It is mostly hateful anyway.

>I meant to ask you something, the Ramsey Family has a website. >It has
not been maintained for over a year and the email address
>there sends mail but it is never answered. Why is that? Why >don't
they take it down rather than leaving it look abandoned.

That site has been quiet for the same reason I watch my every word and
move. It was put up for the reason of allowing the family to make
public comments; intended for the press to read mostly. It was decided that
it might be wise to cease comments until the grand jury makes their
decision. It has not been taken down because it might serve a purpose in
the future.

>Do you think the police will come and arrest Patsy at home or
>will she fly to Atlanta on her own, in company of her >attorney's. It
sounded like they were not going to go for that >and that they were
going to arrest her.

Let us hope no arrest will be made. If so, there will be full
cooperation with the assistance of the family attorneys.

>What is your theory on why there seems to be so much of Patsy in
>the ransom note? I think it is because that was the whole point.

I think some of it is mere coincidence. The bonus parallel leads me to
believe in the theory that the killer had inside info on John, hence,
might be one of his business associates.

>I already asked this, but to me, it is important. Does John >think
this person (that you have the theory about) killed >JonBenet? it has
always appeared to me that John knew who killed >her but for some reason
could not speak up about it.

If John had the least suspicion of who killed his daughter, he would
walk, not run, to the authorities and report everything he knows.

Take Care

Forwarded Message

Date: 6 May 1999 13:56:41 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: The Case

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dear Patti,

>So John doesn't share your theory about this business associate.

I did not say that. He holds several theories, as we all do.

>if I were in John's shoes, I would suspect EVERYONE I knew until >I
was certain each of those people had an airtight alibi.

That is not far from his true feelings. The one person's innocence he
is sure of, and has always been sure of, is that of his wife. I have
never felt that John committed this crime, nor do I think he has knowledge
of who did. I assure you, if he knew anything, the authorities would
receive the information immediately.

>Do you have any idea when the Grand Jury is going to make it's
>next move?

No more than you do.

>The world is such a funny place, there is this young mother of 2
>in Texas... charged with murder, she is being held on another >charge.
Yet I am not hesitating to believe she is guilty.

Maybe her character and actions speak loudly.

>Patsy and John's actions have not be consistent with what I >believe
would be those of parents whose child was murdered
>(It actually makes me laugh when I read the "Burke Theories")

Consider this: The method used to kill JonBenet is totally inconsistent
with the character of her parents. I have voiced this to all the people
I listed who have possession of this address. I contend that this
bizarre method is one known only by a "professional". Burke was too young to
know of such methods. It must be proven that JonBenet's parents were
aware of such explicit methods of torture; that will not happen. Every
conceivable scenario has been played, all revolving around retaliation to
the family, and even the theory that JonBenet's parents killed her
because she wet the bed (outrageous). I ask anyone to explain why, in this
situation, would a parent go to such bizarre lengths if it was indeed a
crime committed in a quick blurred reaction. This was not a reactionary
murder; it was planned and, unfortunately for my little girl, it lasted
for hours.

>What about this "Newsweek" reporter, she believe in the Ramsey
>innocent. Is she doing anything to help the investigation?

No person who could really make a difference in this case, is helping
near enough. Friends and family have done more to help, besides the
attorneys. At least, the mayor or Boulder, and a small percentage of
reporters and writers, have voiced their regrets on how they approached this
case to begin with.

>Jameson character? I can send you copies of what they are >saying. I
really think someone needs to address this issue. Now >she is claiming
that we will all be so surprised when we find >out how just important
she is to the investigation.

Please send copies you deem important. At this point, I doubt anyone
will be that important to the cause of this family in this investigation.

>You probably have no concept of the multitude of people who are
>interested in this case who are active participants in the >various websites
and forums. How active on you on the
>internet as far as reading this website, etc..?

I must admit something to you. I avoid as much coverage as possible. I
try to turn away from every television story about JonBenet. I try to
avoid all magazine and newspaper articles about her. I avoid all the
forums. No, I am not aware of the multitude of people talking on the
Internet. I am certain that you have read much more on the subject than I
have.

>If Patsy is arrested, will I still be able to communicate with
>you ?

That will not happen. We must put our trust in God.

>Something Jams said on her forum yesterday is bothering me, she
>claims two things. First that a hair tie is missing and second >that a
coin was found in this elusive Christmas Bear's pocket. >Is either of
those things true?

I'm sorry, but I am not going to address anything that she has to say
with an answer. I dare her to write to me, personally.

>It is raining here today, a good day to play on the computer for
>me, so I will be here most of the day. I hope to hear form you >soon.

I wish I could have written to you more yesterday. I was taken away
from my computer due to tasks I need to attend to here. Hope to hear from
you soon.

Forwarded Message

Date: 6 May 1999 14:35:58 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Advice

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I'm tempted to say, put my exact words in the forum along with my
e-mail address. Advice please?

>Good Morning Friend:
>Is it ok with you if I take the following statement made by you,
>put it into
>my own words and post it in my discussion group?
>
>

Forwarded Message

Date: 7 May 1999 00:51:23 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: !

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I told you I have never posted to any forum! I can use exclamation
points too!

>Friend:
>Is that you who posted at BNF? I figured it is since that is the
>forum I =
>sent you the page from today.
>If it is not you, then I don't know what to think! It sure the
>heck =
>wasn't me who posted that!
>

Forwarded Message

From: "Catherine E. Lettiere" <tuptup@epix.net>
To: "Patti" <normette@discover-net.net>
Subject: Fw: Post This is the post I meant...I see you did reply now ball in her court.
Date: Sat, 8 May 1999 15:30:35 -0400

Plain Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]


-----Original Message-----
From: Cheesy aka Patti <cheesy21@email.com>
To: Catherine E. Lettiere <tuptup@epix.net>
Date: Saturday, May 08, 1999 2:26 AM
Subject: Fw: Post


>
><-If the shoe fits, get another one just like it < :^)
>-----Original Message-----
>From: Ramsey <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
>To: cheesy21@email.com <cheesy21@email.com>
>Date: Friday, May 07, 1999 9:28 PM
>Subject: Post
>
>
>>Hi,
>>
>>I sent that letter to about 3 people via e-mail two days ago. You
>>can tell the forum people that my theory is in possession of all
>>the people I mentioned to you earlier. The DA has a copy, the
>>attorneys have a copy, of course the Ramsey family possesses a
>>copy and even the Don and Nedra have a copy of this theory. I
>>guess the only people who do not have a copy are the forums. Now
>>that this has happened, I wish I would have refrained from
>>sending a few copies of that paragraph to people who respond to
>>the website. Maybe you can straighten them out and tell them who
>>has possession of this very old theory. You might also tell them
>>who the theory belongs to. I wish now this would have stayed out
>>of these forums.
>>
>>Let's stay in touch.
>>
>>>Friend:
>>>well someone posted your theory at Boulder New Forum and it
>>>wasn't me.
>>>
>>>
>>>whoever it is asked me for the URL to Yahoo so I imagine they
>>are
>>>going to
>>>post their also.
>>>
>>>this is strange.
>>>
>>>Sorry about the exclamation point abuse, I do that alot.....
>>>
>>>Patti
>>>
>>
>>
>
>


Forwarded Message

Date: 9 May 1999 01:27:38 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: The Post

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I am sorry that you had to endure what you did, concerning your
children. Do you remember the panic you felt when you heard about
it? Did you say everything perfectly, or were you so upset that
the words just came out anyway they pleased?

Once, you asked about the call the morning of the 26th. You
wanted to know why the call was made regardless of the ransom
note's warnings. The answer to that is, no parent could have
contained themselves in that situation. It was so cold; JonBenet
was out there in the hands of a madman. Her father could not do
anything BUT call for help.

Yes, you may post my theory; however, I have decided I do not
want you to change a word. I also want you to insert my mail
address so I can clarify any mix-ups. I am very upset that
someone posted that e-mail without asking me. Let me inform you
that I will make every effort to convince people I am not this
Jameson person. On the other hand, I will not divulge my identity
to anyone. After talking to me, you know I am one of two people.
I don't know if I am prepared to admit to being anyone, even to
you.

Thank you for your interest in my life. I will tell you that I
spend time with children, JonBenet's age. Children are very fond
of me and I of them. Yes, I meet children who remind me of
JonBenet. I admit that I feel specially drawn to them. I love
them all. Will you write to me tonight?

Yours


Forwarded Message

Date: 9 May 1999 02:35:04 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Please Stand By

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I do not have access to my original mail to you that states my
theory. I can dig for it and find it. I will write a post
tonight.

It is so nice to get nice mails. I have had it with the bad ones.
The worse letters I receive are addressed to Patricia. That is,
they are talking to me as they believe me Patricia.

Please wait for me tonight? For a change, I want this post to go
out. While you are waiting, tell me what you thought of my last
paragraph concerning other children. I was once asked if I ever
considered adopting.

Yours


**still more to come...

 

Date: 9 May 1999 03:40:07 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: My Post

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

Here it is. Thank you. Claim me as your friend on any forum. Tell
me where the forum is. I MIGHT consider popping in. Don't hold
your breath. Hope this is not too long. Please respond and tell
me what you think? Of course, take this part out....

Dear Forum,

I must admit to you that I was not truly aware of the multitude
of Internet forums revolving around JonBenet. I have been told by
my friends who frequent the forums, that they are full of hate
for the Ramsey family, especially JonBenet's mother. Though it
pains me; it comes as no surprise. I assure you all that, in real
life, no one could have more wonderful, supportive friends.

Recently, I shared some of my thoughts revolving around
JonBenet's murder. She encouraged me to share them with you.

To begin; consider this: The method used to kill JonBenet is
totally inconsistent with the character of her parents. I have
voiced this to all the people I listed who have possession of
this address. I contend that this bizarre method is one known
only by a "professional". Burke was too young to know of such
methods. It must be proven that JonBenet's parents were aware of
such explicit methods of torture; that will not happen. Every
conceivable scenario has been played, all revolving around
retaliation to the family, and even the theory that JonBenet's
parents killed her because she wet the bed (outrageous). I ask
anyone to explain why, in this situation, would a parent go to
such bizarre lengths if it was indeed a crime committed in a
quick blurred reaction. This was not a reactionary murder; it was
planned and, unfortunately for my little girl, it lasted for
hours.

I will say that I believe the killer is in Atlanta. I think he
was a business acquaintance of John's. I love Pamela but I do not
believe ONLY in the retaliatory theory. I think the person who
killed JonBenet was a sick and twisted individual who was
sexually obsessed with her. I think he stalked her for a short
time. I think he DID approach her and talked to her prior to her
death. I have learned a little more about the bizarre practices
of certain people through the correspondences of this address.
Some have described in detail, how they killed JonBenet. Though
it can be discounted as a lie, it is a flipside, in contrast with
all the theories so far. I do think he possibly had business
dealings with John that went all the way to Boulder or possibly,
stayed here in Atlanta.

Yes, the family is afraid to some degree. Mostly the Ramseys are
concerned for their child and the children of others. Everything
John has ever touched, turns to gold, which might breed jealousy
among those closely or distantly working with John. That was only
one of many theories. I also pointed out that I believe a total
stranger to John might have done this; a stalker and child
killer.

Because of my above theory, I have been accused of being this
business connection with John. After all, I live in Atlanta. I
have had my writing supposedly analyzed by software that matches
the ransom note. It also matches the writing style of Patricia
Ramsey but that does not prove I am either. Anyway, who knows the
validity of some stranger's writing style analysis software?

Now, past this theory, I want to clarify a few things. I am not
interested, anytime in the near future, in revealing my identity.
I have been accused of being a few people. I am NOT a person
calling herself Jameson. I am NOT connected with the police.
Though I communicate with various people involved in this case,
the police are the last people I would talk to. I live in
Atlanta, but that in no way means I am the Ramseys themselves,
nor does it prove I am the business associate I spoke of earlier.
I have been accused of being Patricia; desperate to talk to
someone who thinks I am innocent. Please be rest assured:
Patricia has plenty of friends to talk to, in real life, who love
her and support her. I have been accused of being JonBenet's
killer. I have lived in Atlanta, off and on for the past several
years, and I do remember when John drove a truck; however, that
does not mean I killed JonBenet.

I have NEVER posted anything on a forum. Furthermore, a friend
posted this for me. I HAVE decided to post my anonymous e-mail
address here so that you may direct your mail my way. This way, I
can discount threats and negative responses, on my own.

ramsey@nym.alias.net

Forwarded Message

Date: 10 May 1999 03:07:08 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Patti, My Friend

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

My Dearest Patti,

I looked at your board. It was interesting. I thank you for your
posts. I can see, you spend a lot of time defending me. One of
the responders to my post (which I might add, looked nice) stated
that she believes me, Patricia. I think, if she saw some of my
correspondences with one of my last friends, she would probably
be convinced; God forbid. He was so hateful to me. He stopped
writing to me. I think I will send one of his meanest letters to
you. I want you to see how much people hate me. You know what?
I've become numb to it all. He used to call me terrible names. I
remember telling him things about myself; sensitive things. I was
hoping to make him see that I was a real person. He insisted I
was a terrible person. He also insisted that I was Patricia,
hence, he addressed all his letters: "Dear Patricia". He also
insisted that I wrote the ransom letter. Patti, I did not write
that ransom letter; however, I assure you that it was merely a
diversionary tactic.

I also saw some of your posts, when you were at your wits end
with me. More than anything, you have been defensive of me with
your friends; taking my part. Thank you, Patti.

I loved JonBenet. I think of her everyday. I go to her; now in
her grave. Oh yes, she has risen and is an angel with Beth, but I
feel her everloving presence at her grave. Did I tell you that I
feel her spririt has followed me from her grave? It lasts for a
few days. She does things to let me know she is close. If only I
could have comforted her in her final hour. Then, there are those
who firmly believe that I was there with her. Oh God, if only I
could turn back time; my baby would be with me now.

Write to me here?


Forwarded Message

Date: 11 May 1999 02:20:53 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Hate for JonBenet's Mother

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

You misunderstood me when I said I saw your forum. Seeing your
forum doesn't mean I now frequent your forum. I am still not a
reader. I did see a few interesting points. To be honest, it is
not the easiest thing for me to know how to get around on that
forum. I will only makes posts through you.

I think I will forward some of my hate mail to you tonight. I am
also considering sending you a letter that I will not admit to
writing. I do have possession of it. You can it like you want to.

Now for the hate mail. I received this a few weeks ago. It can
really hurt to get mails like this. I kept talking to this person
for some time after several such explosions. I continued to show
him kindness. In case you don't gather it, this letter is
addressed to Patricia Ramsey, though he has changed the greeting
somewhat... He was mad at me and had decided to say goodbye...
Please do not post this unless I request you to. I am tempted to
let you post it. Hold for now. Save this one:

Kiss my , you stupid !

Goodbye you raving, child-killing maniac. You threaten me and
I'll come after you with the might of the entire Justice
Department of the United States of America. Your high-priced
incompetent, politically motivated attorneys won't be able to
assist you one iota. I know who the unshakably honest people in
government, criminal investigation and law enforcement are. You
damn fool! You won't be free to roam around without leg chains,
hand cuffs and prison garb much longer, you raving maniac. But
do make me one last promise with the intention of keeping it;
don't kill yourself (I know you'd like to). That would be the
final ultimate COWARDLY act, and one which would be right down
your alley. Appear for your arraignment. Don't jump bail, if
they grant it, and they might not. Don't flee the country (we
will find you, you sick chick). Don't confess. That would be too
uncowardly a gesture for you ever to perform. Attend the trial
faithfully. I want to see you squirm! I want to see your painful
expressions everyday. I want to see you finally own up to your
dreadful misdeed. I want to see you hang your head in shame
before the nation and the world. I want to watch you look those
honest, hardworking, decent child-nurturing, justice-loving
jurors in the eye (I know you can't). You don't ever look anyone
in the eye when you're spouting your lies and hate rhetoric. You
don't even keep your eyes open when you dishonestly "assert" in
a carefully rehearsed and circumscribed, televised "press
conference" to the nation, "I loved that child...with all my
heart and soul". Your damn, lying, deceitful eyes were closed
the whole time! Inability to look at your audience with your
eyes wide open is a classic sign of untruthfulness. Susan Smith
put on a more convincing performance than you did, and she had
no formal training or practical experience in journalism, drama,
acting or the like. Patricia Paugh, what a disgrace to the human
race you have always been. The entire nation knew you were being
untruthful from the very moment you opened your mouth. I want to
see you as emotionally uncomfortable as it is cosmically
possible for any human to be. Then I want to be there on behalf
of JonBenet Ramsey when the Jury says "guilty as charged" and
when each and every one of them says "Guilty" loudly and clearly
when polled, and I want to be there on behalf of JonBenet Ramsey
when the Judge pronounces sentence, and when your sorry butt
disappears behind prison walls never to see the light of day
again. I want to be there on behalf of JonBenet Ramsey, for the
sake of the beautiful little innocent and trusting girl child,
who trusted and was horribly and monstrously betrayed by the
very person whom she loved, admired and respected more than
anyone else in the world. I can't help you now. It's out of my
hands now. I did give you several opportunities to bring an
honorable end to this whole sorry mess, but your cowardice
prevailed. I want every last excruciating detail of your murder
of the innocent little girl paraded before every interested
observer throughout the entire Earth! I want every man, woman
and child to see what a cowardly, brutal, lying, undeserving
you really are! Why didn't you get psychiatric help before
you got to the point where you were capable of and actually did
strangle your own innocent little flesh and blood! I'm going to
feel really good when the day comes that the lethal fluid is
injected into your veins and the civilized world (the one where
normal, even socio-economically disadvantaged, mothers don't
club their daughters, then sexually molest them and strangle
them to death with a crude, barbaric, archaic instrument from
the Dark Ages) is rid of your lying, deceiving, cowardly,
conniving, arrogant, misguided, dishonest, promise-breaking,
mealy-mouthed, pompous, conceited, reckless, irresponsible,
self-serving, selfish, delusional, schizophrenic, whimpering,
complaining, whining, disloyal, crazy, lunatic, disgraceful,
manipulative, scheming, shameful, despicable, monstrous
anti-contributions to society once and for all. And just think
what the Big Man will do when He gets His hands on you with your
vanquished, innocent little child's soul looking on. You are the
quintessential example of evolution gone awry.

As for my depression, everybody in my town knows about it and is
supportive, and many people in my State know about it and are
supportive, the Veterans Administration of the United States (of
which I am a lifelong citizen and an honorably discharged
military veteran) knows about it and anybody in the world who
wants to know about it or talk about it, if doing so will be
helpful to them in any way, except YOU, is more than welcome to
know about it, you sorry-assed little puke! What did you ever do
for your country besides expect it to note the silver spoon in
your mouth and hand you the world on a silver platter?

As for the letters, I have told you several times by now that in
my view and in my power to render them so, they were
confidential, they are confidential, they will remain
confidential, until such time as (if ever it comes and I don't
care one way or another) you decide otherwise. Also, there has
never been any doubt in my mind and that of many others
regarding your identity; there is none now, and for you to
continue to deny your identity and to deny your complicity in
the murder of your daughter, and to deny that you authored the
ransom note, and to deny that you authored the "John Ramsey"
public letter, and for you to deny the myriad things which were
true, are true and will always be true, before God, is for you
to sink deeper and deeper into denial, to withdraw farther and
farther from salvation by beast, man or God.

And, as for God, you have never believed in Him, you don't
believe in Him now, you didn't believe in Him when you were sick
with cancer or when you were fastening the noose around your
daughter's neck, or when you were tightening the garrote, or
when you were smashing her brains out, and you won't believe in
Him in the future until the very moment you are forced to stand
before Him, the supreme Judge, the final Arbiter, and He and
Jesus and JonBenet together pick you up and cast you in to the
fiery pit of eternal damnation. You are the biggest, most
obviously phoney person that I have ever had the distinct
displeasure to know even existed on the face of the Earth.
Finally, and I think this is what precipitated this whole sad,
tragic affair, in addition to being one of the sorriest if not
the most sorry excuse/s for a human being to every draw a breath
on this planet, you are the most quintessentially genuine COWARD
ever to born to humankind. MAY GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL--I
honestly don't think he will. There is a special place in HELL
for mothers who murder their own children in cold blood.

Victory! J.F.J.R. (Justice for JonBenet Ramsey)



Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: "Midnite" <bgraves@lcc.net>
Subject: May11-18
Date: Fri, 1 Oct 1999 23:02:31 -0500

HTML Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

more letters from the edge of insanity
Forwarded Message

Date: 11 May 1999 14:49:48 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Thank You

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

>Oh my gosh! that was so horrible I couldn't even read it all!
>You save that letter because you have some threats there that
>you may be able to do something about if you ever find it
>necessary. Also sounds like this person may try to hurt you, or
>Patsy. If Patsy is cleared of this, I have a feeling this person
>will not believe it and may try to harm either you or Patsy. At
>the very least if someone does start stalking the family, the
>police can track down this person and see if he has an alibi.

Thank you for your sympathy. I never thought about him actually
harming us. Well, I talked to him about stalking. Either way, I
have his first and last name. I also know where he lives. I do
have friends who know a lot about computers and the Internet. I
would have to to get through even one of these e-mails. You see,
these mails are encrypted, then decrypted; in-route, routed
through anonymous servers, etc. I did not figure this out by
myself.

>>>I am also considering sending you a letter that I will not
>>>admit to writing. I do have possession of it. You can it like
>>>you want to.

I left out the word "take". I meant to say, "you can take it like
you want to." It was just a very special mail that I would like
to share with you, signed Patricia.

>Do you want me to send you any posts at the forum that I think
>you might be interested in or need to address?

Please. And also, is there any way you can omit all the http
writing?

>I will be here most of the day, please write back soon.

Thank you for warning me about Gail. I sent her the following
mail. Don't tell her I sent you a copy. Thank you, Love.


Gail,

How are you? I understand that you posted a private mail I sent
to you. I want to clarify a few things with you. I did not intend
to have that message posted to any public forum. Once you DID
post it, the negative feedback from it prompted me to have the
full version of my theory posted to another forum, by a friend of
mine. I have NEVER directly posted to a forum and never will.

Gail, I am sorry that you believe the Ramsey family is guilty,
hence, making every attempt, including posting to a forum, to be
exonerated. I assure you that Mr. Haddon, Mr. Morgan, or even a
friend of this family, Michael Bynum; is not using the Internet
to try out new theories. It is beneath the attorneys and the
friends of this family. I assume you think I am possibly,
Rachelle Zimmer? Correct me if I am wrong.

Gail, I wish you only the best. I would rather you not post mail
I send to you, but if you must; there is little I can do about
it. Your original post caused me to ask a friend to make the
first post ever from this address. I'm not upset with you. I
think you honestly want justice for JonBenet. We all want justice
for her. That is why the Ramseys cannot be convicted, allowing
the real killer to kill again. Please continue your fight for
justice for our JonBenet.

Thank you




Forwarded Message

Date: 11 May 1999 16:47:01 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: A Letter

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

Thank you for your compliment concerning my mail to this Gail
person. I appreciate "graceful". She sent a horrible mail back. I
will not respond again. She accused me of being you, Patricia,
and a lawyer with Haddon/Morgan. She thinks Burke killed
JonBenet. That just shows how little she understands the methods
used to murder my baby.

I include the letter I spoke of earlier. I will omit the
signature. I will also say here that I only possess this letter
and do not take credit for writing it or not writing it. You can
deduce who the author is without my signature. I claim to be no
one but a person who loves every memeber of this family and
wants justice for a child who deserves it.

Begin reading here:

I would love to tell you more about myself and JonBenet on a
personal level. To begin, I will tell you about my experience
with Beth. I believe I told you that I had cancer and underwent
chemotherapy treatment. That was a trying time for me. JonBenet
was such a strong little girl during this time. Burke mostly
stayed quiet. I always attributed that to the fact that he was a
little boy and was trying to hide his tears. JonBenet was not at
all uncomfortable with all the IV's and bags of blood. She was
mostly curious. She was just her regular self; energetic,
inquisitive, and highly supportive.

During this dismal time in my life, I found solace in talking to
Beth. Somehow I felt she was looking down over me. I felt that
she was in a place where she could do just that. It was as if she
was helping me survive this illness.

After my chemotherapy, I had to have a CAT scan to see if the
chemotherapy had done away with the cancer. It was during this
time that I asked Beth to help me get through this. Shortly after
I had spoken to Beth, a person looking exactly like her appeared
beside me. She told me her name was Bethany, and that she would
be the person running my CAT scan. I did not recognize her as
any person I had ever seen working there. I also never saw her
again. My CAT scan was negative. I will always feel like Bethany
was actually my guardian angel, Beth.

END

Actually, I cut that letter short. I decided I should not send
the remainder, at this time. I hope you do not take this in the
wrong way. As I said, it is simply in my possession. It does
create the impression that Patricia is a real person with
sensitive emotions. Patti; JonBenet's mother could not have
killed her. It is impossible.


Forwarded Message

Date: 11 May 1999 21:48:43 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Maybe No Reponse is the Best Response

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

>Is your first name Linda?

NO

Is this your response to that letter? I just told someone last
night that the Internet has been a horrible experience from day
one. I think it is time for me to discontinue using it.

Forwarded Message

Date: 12 May 1999 02:29:45 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Ultimatum

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I see we are back to your ultimatum. My, people change so quickly
on the Internet.

>Should you decide to tell me who you are, we can go from then,
>until that time, good bye.

Goodbye Patti. I have always been good at giving my friends what
they want. This is the second time you have asked. I grant you
your wish. I liked you very much. I will miss you.

>>The scary thing about this is, I came so close=20
>>to telling you who I am. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I didn't. Thank God I
>didn't.

Forwarded Message

Date: 13 May 1999 01:24:01 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: "Don't Be Vexed, Little One"

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I've been thinking about you, so chances are; you've been
thinking about me. I know you are very upset with me, but I
thought I would just send a few mails to you. Of course, I expect
nothing in return. After all, I have caused all this through my
anonymous objectives. For that, I am so sorry, Love.

My mother used to say, "Oh my little one; why are you so vexed
with me?" I was a little pouter. When my feelings were hurt; they
were hurt for good. But mom had this way about her. She had
always instilled an inner-strength in all of us kids. It always
helped me to get through hard times. It also convinced me that
being vexed at mom was not advantageous to either of us. After
all, my mother wouldn't tolerate it.

Patti, I think it sad to throw away a really nice relationship
over this misunderstanding. First and foremost, I am sorry for
causing you any grief, by avoiding to tell you who I am. I have
given you a lot of reasons in the past for doing this. I noticed
your mention of me possibly being the killer, or else I would not
try to hide behind a veil of secrecy. Patti, I loved that child
so much. I still love her. I have told you that I am not her
killer. Many think I am her killer, but I know, in my heart, that
I am not. If you thought I was, for a second, you would have
already gone to the authorities; hence, I refuse to believe you
feel I am the killer.

Would you talk to me again if I told you I was Patricia Ramsey?
Or, would you talk to me again if I told you I was NOT Patricia
Ramsey. I will say this to you; I would talk to you regardless of
who you are. I would allow you to be anonymous. On the other
hand, this is all so upsetting to you. Patti, admit it; you miss
me. You have not stopped thinking about me since we parted. I
didn't want to stop being your friend. I said goodbye because I
wanted to make you happy. I don't feel right about it. Patti, I
believe that I have talked to you like no other person in this
case has. I know you feel that, when you talk to me.

Patti, you have been so sweet to me. You have taken my part. You
have convinced me that you feel JonBenet's family is innocent of
her murder. I really feel good sharing things with you. I have no
agenda. I just wanted to talk to you about JonBenet. I wanted to
share my thoughts about her killer with you. I have more things
to share.

Patti, you will always be my friend. It is all my fault that we
are apart now. I am so very sorry that I cannot bear to tell you
who I am. I know how frustrating that must be. My mistake was
sending that last letter to you. I'm sorry Patti.

Always Yours

**more...

 

Date: 13 May 1999 04:52:36 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: More About Patricia

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

So very nice to see your sweet mail to me once more. Being
friends is the best, I've found. I have some great ones here in
Atlanta. I once had this wonderful sense of humor. There is not
so much to laugh about anymore, although, I always think about
JonBenet and her insistance that we all be happy. Oh, she was a
happy little girl. She, like my mother, would not tolerate anyone
being vexed or depressed.

>As always you seem to know when I am near my computer. I haven't
>been near the thing for hours and then I flip it on and there
>you are and your letter was sent just minutes ago.

You already know, I believe in angels.

I like music; Do you?

>I would like to know why you have said this twice to me: I
>noticed your mention of me possibly being the killer, the time
>that I said that I was not accusing you of being the killer

Only responding twice.

>you could be Mickey Mouse.

You are getting warmer... You're burning up!

>* would like to clarify that I do think NICE people can,under
>very stressful situations, do bad things.

I agree, however, the method used is too bizarre.

>Yes I did think about you today and I was terribly bored and
>that made me think about this whole situation even more.

I knew you were thinking of me. I was also thinking of you.

>I REALLY want to find out who killed JonBenet and you were the
>ONLY person I had to talk to that wasn't constantly saying "but
>THIS points to Patsy

I was fully aware of that. I also got a taste of that at that
forum.

>I really REALLY want to get to know more, alot more, about
>Patsy.

I thought so. That is why I sent the letter to you about Beth.
That is a true story. It really happened.

>Physically she is capable of this crime, we can not deny that.
>So am I so is just about every person on earth.

According to Boulder police, every person on earth was, at one
time, a possible suspect.

>Before I go any further, is this something that you would feel =
>uncomfortable talking about?

I will tell you if I feel uncomfortable talking about something.
I got very uncomfortable talking about JonBenet's pageants to the
man who sent me the hateful letter.

>What I want to know about is the emotional Patsy. COULD
>something have snapped in her? There are times when my kids
>drive me right smack to the edge and I know that given a very
>extreme set of circumstances, I could go over the edge.

The issue at hand with everyone seems to be that of JonBenet's
bedwetting. For God sakes, every child has accidents. That is all
it was; accidents. Why on earth would a mother kill her child for
wetting the bed? Certainly not JonBenet's mother.

Description of Patricia: loving, considerate, loyal to her
friends, generous, modest, just your average mom, witty, loves
her friends and family very much, concerned for others;
especially if they are sick or in need, very concerned about the
safety of other little girls like JonBenet who might be the
target of her killer.

>Like I said, if this makes you uncomfortable, we can skip it.

No, it is fine.

>I have other sources I can look into, but having someone near
>and dear to her would be the most reliable.

That makes me feel special to you. Thank you.

>How is Burke doing? That poor child, is he going to come out of
>this all right? He is the same age as my oldest boy and many
>times as I watch him and his buddies goof around and play, I
>wonder what kind of life Burke has now. Thankfully, the media
>has been kind enough to leave him out of it, for the most part.

Burke attends school like other children. He is very quiet,
unlike JonBenet. He does not show his feelings. As was stated in
the letter I sent to you; I believe as does the letter, that
Burke is all boy and does not show emotion. You might notice that
he is distant from his parents in most media footage. He is not
withdrawn, but he is terribly shy. He likes sports, but he is not
super at it. Rest assured, he still gets encouragement from his
father. Burke loved his sister very much.

Tell me more about your children.

>hide behind a veil of secrecy. " If that is the reason you do
>not tellme who you are, I hope you will re-read my paragraph
>about how I DO NOT think you are the killer.

Keep that in mind when I send a confession letter to you that I
received here.

>Your statement seems to say to me that if you knew I did not
>think you were the killer, you would not be frightened to tell
>me who you are.

99% of all the people I have talked to, think I am Patricia
Ramsey. 1% thinks I am JonBenet's killer; looking for a way to
talk about my horrible crime. After all, I posted pictures of
JonBenet's grave. Her killer probably has a deep affinity for her
mother. It all makes perfect sense. That is what I meant by, "I
could be one of two people." I was referring to Patricia or the
killer himself. Since my murder theories are in the hands of the
authorities, I would be a very foolish killer.

>If I thought you were the killer, I would have turned you in by
>now. Odd thing about that is, I wouldn't have a clue WHO to turn
>a suspected killer in to.

You could contact the Ramsey attorneys. You could contact the
Boulder District Attorney. Or, you could contact the Boulder
police.... CrimeStoppers is another option. I can give you those
addresses.

>Certainly none of the bungling idiots who have fouled up this
>case so far.

It has been the deepest concern of this family for the past 2
years that the Boulder police is handling such a case.

>I certainly don't understand why you cannot bear to tell me who
>you are?

Just trust me.

>Do you think I will be ashamed of you? I would have no reason to
>think that of you. My heavens, I think you are a real sweet
>person who feels the way I do about this case.

Oh Patti, thank you for that. I think you are sweet too. You are
way too sweet to be kept in the dark.

>I will be going out of town for a few days.

I hope to stay in touch with you until the day you leave. I hope
you get this tonight.

>It would be especially nice if there was a letter when I get
>back on Sunday.

Patti dear, I will do better than that. I hope I do not make you
feel uncomfortable with my terms of endearment. May I send a
letter concerning terms of endearment and JonBenet's mother? This
way, you can understand her more. JonBenet loved to be flattered
by such terms. JonBenet was so intelligent. She was witty as
well; just like her mother.

>Missed you Too,

Oh, I missed you too, love.

Yours


Forwarded Message

Date: 14 May 1999 02:16:31 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Hi

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

>Yes I like music, I used to always have the radio on or a CD
>playing but now that I spend so much time on the computer I find
>it easier to concentrate without any sounds interrupting my
>thoughts. My favorites are Whitney Houston, Cher and Hootie &
>The Blowfish.

Abba has a song that says, "I believe in angels; something good
in everything I see." I like picking out certain lyrical syntax
that best suits my innermost feelings, or just my situation.

>Bedwetting. I can't see anyone going ballistic about it. It is
>not that big of a deal.

That is all JonBenet had; accidents. There was never a major deal
made out of it by either of her parents. To think someone would
actually believe a parent would torture their child to death for
wetting the bed, is rediculous.

You might notice that I refer to JonBenet's death as, torture. I
do not believe the trauma to her head came first; followed by
strangulation. I think JonBenet was tortured for hours until the
ligature around her neck rendered her virtually dead; then the
blow was delivered when the killer panicked that she was not
quite dead. That was very painful to type.

>I have two boys, the other one is 11 and he is ALL BOY. The
>younger one is more sensitive.

Isn't it strange how two children who are brothers or sisters;
can be so unlike each other?

>He is always looking out for me. A real sweetheart. He likes
>books and is an A student.

JonBenet was a good little mommy. She was verbose at school. Her
teacher was impressed with her outgoing nature in school.

>The other one digs in the dirt and hates taking a bath. School
>means nothing to him other than a chance to hang out with his
>buddies.

As life progresses for them, things might change.

>you received a confession letter? What did you do with it? Was
>it just some sicko?

It is what I base my theory on.

>WHY are your theories in the hands of the police? Everyone has a
>theory about this murder. Is that what is taking so long, they
>are looking at EVERY conceivable theory?

I suppose mine is among thousands of other.

>I don't even know who the Ramsey's attorneys are. Johnnie
>Cochran and Robert Shapario are the only names I would
>recognize, LOL!

How about Hal Haddon and Bryan Morgan?

>>>May I send a letter concerning terms of endearment and
>>>>JonBenet's mother?

I need to find it first.

Sorry about not writing today. I have been out all day. May I ask
you a question? Is the Ramsey residential address floating around
on the Internet? That is a scary thought. Of course, there are a
few cars going by from time to time, but I always thought that
was a local occurence. If people have the Paugh residence
address, I fear many might have John Ramsey's address.

Yours


Forwarded Message

Date: 17 May 1999 02:11:31 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Stand By

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I am sorry I did not write to you. I was away this weekend as
well. Please stand by. I will write tonight. I missed you.


Forwarded Message

Date: 17 May 1999 02:35:44 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: My Reply

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

>Now how she knows this when she lives in NC is beyond me. If I
>ask her, she says I can't name my source. Which is why I don't
>talk to her to begin with, her and her SOURCE bull crap makes me
>want to puke.

I fear she knows nothing about any such cars in front of the
house.

>I am still reading Schiller's book. I just got to the part
>about JonBenet being tortured. How odd that you chose today to
>talk about it.

I don't care for Schiller. Strange how the coincidences continue
between the two of us. JonBenet WAS tortured. I am certain of it.
Why the police is not; is beyond me. They are badly out of touch.

>Have you read any of the books out?

No, no, and no.

>Have you ever been questioned by the Police?

Wow. I have talked to the police. I do not consider the talking
as being questioning; if that makes any sense at all.

>Now I hear that this JT COLFAX guy is saying that he heard (from
>some inmates at the prison) that there was a drug party going on
>in the neighborhood the night JonBenet died. Have you heard
>about this?

I don't know of anyone on 15th Street being capable of a drug
party. At least, no one close to 755 would be capable of a drug
party. That is just more nonsense.

>And what about this Susanah Chase that was killed in Boulder the
>following year, just before Christmas? Do you now anything about
>that?

No. Please tell me more. I want her age.

>>>How about Hal Haddon and Bryan Morgan?

>Those names are mentioned in Schiller's books. Pat Burke too. I
>guess I haven't paid much attention to the names of the Ramsey's
>lawyers.

I have the firms address, of course. Theories should be sent
there.

>You mentioned you have a lawyer. Is there any particular reason
>you feel the need for an attorney?

I thought everyone had a lawyer.

>Oh another question. Is John a licensed Pilot or not? Or was he
>ever?

Absolutely. How on earth would he be able to get off the ground
without one? More rediculous nonsense.

>The address to the house in Boulder is available on the
>internet. I can do some more digging when I get back and find
>out more on this. Remind me on Sunday. ( I have a terrible
>memory)

Consider yourself reminded.

I thought I would add that, I am fully convinced that JonBenet
was killed by a man who might have known John in Atlanta, but
could have also been a guest at the Whites. He was and is,
sexually attracted to little girls fitting JonBenet's
description. He might have frequented some of her pageants and
definitely frequents other pageants now. I believe JonBenet was
his type because she was very attractive and from a nice
background. Past his sexual attraction to her; he wanted to
slowly bring her to death through his methods of torture, known
only by a person who has dabbled in such for years. The list goes
on. The family attorneys and the district attorney's office have
most of this information; passed personally on by me.

I hope to hear from you tonight. I understand if you had to go to
bed. Hope you had a great weekend.

Love Always


Forwarded Message

Date: 17 May 1999 03:29:06 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Methods

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

>I did some checking and I come up with 21 John Ramsey's living
>in GA and over 500 email addresses for John Ramsey.

Thank you.

>This man that you are talking about, that you suspect killed
>JonBenet, do you think the Police are investigating him?

No, I do not think the police is investigating him. I DO think he
is very familiar with their tactics. I believe he is a friend to
law enforcement, in general.

>it sounds like you have something there!

Finally, someone is listening to me. Thanks.

>I sure hope either the police or John's team of investigator's
>can get some evidence linking this man to the crime.

No leads.

>Maybe it is a good thing that the media is playing up the Ramsey
>angle, giving this man the confidence to breathe easy, thinking
>he is home free.

I am certain that he has contact with children.

>Aren't you scared that he may hurt the Family again? Good
>heavens, BE CAREFUL!!

I honestly think he has who he wanted: JonBenet. There is some
fear, but logic tells me that this man craves children; not
adults. My only fear might arise from my tipping off certain
people in this case as to his identity. His interest is in
attractive little girls like JonBenet. He may even search out
little girls just like her; down to similar socioeconomic status.

>Susannah Chase was young, a college student I believe. She was
>murdered a few days before Christmas of the following year of
>JonBenet's death.

I read it and, all due respect, I do not believe there are any
similarities that would link this killer to JonBenet's killer.
JonBenet's killer wants little girls. He would not have bothered
with a college student. Also, the modus operandi is totally
different. Thank you for passing that on to me.

>Nope, not everyone has a lawyer. Thankfully I have never needed
>one. Or maybe I did and didn't know it......

I guess I sound jaded; I am really not.

Today, I reflected on the reverend at our church. He was a very
nice person. He passed away in March. I remember the comforting
words he said to me when I lost JonBenet. It is so hard to
believe he is gone. It is hard to believe JonBenet is gone, as
well. I just wonder if our reverend knows the answer now about
JonBenet.

Hope to hear from you tonight.

Love Always


Forwarded Message

Date: 17 May 1999 16:31:58 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Hello..

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Hi Patti,

Thought I would let you know that I never received your mail this
morning.


Forwarded Message

Date: 18 May 1999 00:41:03 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: More Later

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest,

I am here, between "coming and going". I will respond to you in
full tonight. Please stand by. I got an interesting mail from
Gail today. It was a threat concerning Burke and his molestation?
This is all new to me. Anyway, she says she knows who I am. I
think I will ask her ans see if she is right. She is also
threatening to turn me in if I do not respond. This sounds like
the same thing that happened to John. He got calls from a
prostitute, threatening to blow his cover. That is when he
responded that she must have wanted her 15 minutes of fame. Was
it Andy Warhol who coined that phrase, or was it Truman Capote?
Keep this quiet until I get to the bottom of it.

Indeed, if anyone could speak from the dead and tell JonBenet's
story, it would be my deceased reverend. He was very close to the
situation. Then again, he was very distant from us all.

I will talk to you more tonight. Not trying to hedge your
questions; I just need to go out for a while.

Love to You



Forwarded Message

Date: 18 May 1999 02:08:56 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Wait

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest,

I am home again. I am writing to you now.

Love


Forwarded Message

Date: 18 May 1999 02:30:25 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Finally

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

My Dearest,

>Now this man you think should be a suspect, you said:
>> I believe he is a friend to law enforcement, in general.
>Could this be why Alex hunter has been accused of being lenient?
>He may be known to Hunter?

I would have to be him to answer that. I think he might possibly
a powerful person. Then again, I feel sometimes that he might be
nothing. I am unsure. I do think he is very charismatic with
children and adults alike.

>There is some confusion going on about the Ramsey's and the GJ
>and whether they have been asked to testify, want to testify or
>what the deal is. The way I understand it, the GJ has not asked
>them to testify, which to me indicates that they may be looking
>elsewhere. Let's certainly hope this is the case. Do you think
>it may be?

There has been no place else to look. I think that possibly,
someone is digging day and night for evidence to hurt this
family. Instead of even considering other possibilities, I
sometimes feel they are just trying to perfect the case against
JonBenet's parents. If justice is served, this family will not be
approached for anything but assistance.

>You say there are no leads that point towards this man, how can
>that be? There must be SOMETHING.

He DID leave something: his M O. The police will not even
consider the M O of the murderer. Why not?? That is where I lose
it with the police and Alex Hunter's investigators. M O's are
crucial to OTHER cases; why not with this one? JonBenet was
strangled to death; then struck with a blunt object in the head.
She was tortured to death, right under the family's nose; which
just added to this sick person's excitement. Why won't anyone
listen to me??

>I don't know if this is >significant or not but the words "AND
>HENCE" were in the ransom note as well as Patsy's Christmas
>letter that year. Seems to me that the person who wrote the
>ransom note used a copy of that letter as a basis to copy
>Patsy's handwriting and terminology.

I use the word "hence" very often. Does that mean I wrote the
ransom note? I think a lot of people use that word. I agree that
it was a frame up.

>Perhaps the investigative team should track down a list of the
>people who received that year's Christmas letter and start
>checking out those people.

That would be a great idea.

>It INFURIATES me when people say "well, "and hence" is a PATSY
>word and it was in the ransom note"

Well, I guess that makes me the writer of the ransom note.

>You say the man has contact with children.....In what capacity?
>In Atlanta or in Boulder?

He lives in Atlanta. He never left Atlanta. Oh, he left for short
times, but he kept his roots here.

>If your Reverend is with JonBenet now, let's hope he finds a way
>to tell us where to look for her killer. I firmly believe this
>is entirely possible.

If anyone could tell us about JonBenet, it would more likely be
Beth. I have not seen my reverend since his death. Beth is
another story.

>Have the Ramsey's ever thought of contacting a psychic?

Do you think I am a psychic?

>I know it may sound crazy but nothing else has worked so far,
>why not try it?

Do you know how many letters we have received from so called
psychics? I do not discount psychics. I believe in angels much
more.

>If you could just keep the media from knowing about it, it would
>be fine. If Pam contacted a psychic, no one would think too much
>of it.

Ahh, my sweetest Pam. I love her so. She means well.

Love To You

**more to come...

 

Date: 18 May 1999 02:35:07 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Forward To Patti

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Thank you for sending your correspondence with Gail. She is a
darling, isn't she? She hates this family. Here was my response.



Gail,

>You did not answer my last email. I had some quesitons for you.

I thought I answered you last. Also, I did not think you wanted
to talk to me.

>In the meantime...the jig is up. I know WHO molested Burke, I
>know WHEN and I know HOW. Are you ready to sit down and talk to
>me face to face?

Who do you think you are talking to? What makes you think Burke
was molested? Please share this with me.

>You know exactly who I am.

I only know you as Gail. My friend Patti told me you frequent
Internet forums. Since I do not frequent the forums, I do not
know anything about you. I take it that you do not like the
Ramsey family.

>It's time to come out or this info goes public. The person who
>did it should be punished.

It? Are you referring to JonBenet's killer? I hope the killer is
punished as well. It is for that reason that the police must look
in another direction besides just that of her parents.

Peace Be With You




Forwarded Message

Date: 18 May 1999 03:24:48 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Thoughts about her killer

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

My Dearest,

I have been thinking about some of the confession letters I have
received. Mostly, they are fakes, I would assume; however, what
if one was real: a stalker in the basement of the house, awaiting
the family's arrival. As he approached JonBenet, she would have
surely awakened. But then, most children are heavy sleepers, even
if they are not. If she woke up, she would have screamed. Wait.
If she knew this man, she wouldn't have screamed. Maybe he was a
person who had spoken to her at the party. Maybe they played and
talked in the shuffle of things. After all, JonBenet met almost
everyone there. She was charismatic as well. But this man was
also charismatic. He had a way with attractive little girls, and
still does. JonBenet was very intelligent which also made her
curious. Her father was close to her. She had no fear of men.
After all, John is so gentle and affectionate. He is not
openly expressive in public; a Ramsey trait; but he is very
gentle and affectionate with his children. Once the killer got
JonBenet in the basement; possibly luring her and telling her
they were playing a game so she must stay quiet, he then set his
plan in motion. JonBenet would have detected danger by now,
hence, the reason for the tape. I think I must stop talking about
this now. It is very difficult to do this. I think that is why I
shy away when it comes to theories I have.

Love


Forwarded Message

Date: 18 May 1999 20:48:41 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Hi

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Hi,

Did you get my mail last night concerning JonBenet's killer? I
owe you a mail.

I will not watch Larry King. I do appreciate you telling me about
it. I have not heard from Gail. I suppose she posted my mail to
her on a forum; laughable.

Love


Forwarded Message

Date: 19 May 1999 04:26:50 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Too Late

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

>My forum group is having a chat tonight after the Larry King
>show.

I just hate programs about this case. It bothers me so much. It
is hard to explain. It makes me feel like someone is talking
behind my back. It is a terrible feeling. I guess I just don't
feel like the public has a right to JonBenet's life.

>I am sure the topic of Burke's voice being on the 911 tape is
>going to come up. Any advise you can give me on how to handle
>that one?

Like I told you once; things are very hectic during times like
those. We say things we are not sure of when emergencies arise.
Imagine the whirlwind that was going on in the Ramsey home that
morning. Everything was chaos. A little girl was out there in the
cold; unsafe and out of the arms of her parents. People make such
a big deal out of everything a mom and dad says that had just
lost their little girl. That is the best I can say to you.

Love to you


Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: Fw: letters May 20-May30
Date: Fri, 1 Oct 1999 23:33:29 -0500

HTML Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]


-----Original Message-----
From: Patti D. aka Cheesy <cheesy21@email.com>
To: Midnite <bgraves@lcc.net>
Date: Friday, October 01, 1999 11:33 PM
Subject: letters May 20-May30


carol McKinley from Fox News is who she refers to in these letters
Forwarded Message

Date: 20 May 1999 14:25:50 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Depressed

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

>I misunderstood, I thought Nancy had emailed you. If you would >like
to speak to her I am sure she would love it, she loves >talking about
the pageants. One problem, WHO do I tell her you >are?

That's a tough one... She wouldn't believe you if you DID tell her who
I am.

>I have never seen anything written about Nedra speaking at all. >The
only one who I have heard about is Pam.

After the move from 755, the press asked her if the family would ever
return. Her reply was, something to the effect of, "They won't be
returning to that Hell hole." That is typical Nedra; always coining a new
phrase. Yes, Andy Worhol coined the phrase about "15 minutes of fame". He
once stated that, in the future, every person will be famous for at
least 15 minutes. Maybe he was foretelling the future on the Internet.
People like Gail are great examples.

>Damned if you do and damned if you don't........I think I would >get
more satisfaction out of at least TRYING to get my message >across.

Patti, it is no use.

>Gail already turned her "information" about Burke over to the >police

Good ole BPD. Now they have one more piece of information to play with.
I assure her; BPD is way too busy hanging JonBenet's parents and
brother to have time for her little games.

>The overall meaning I got from the Larry King show is that >nothing is
happening and it doesn't look like anything will >happen in the near
future at any time.

Wow! Finally, a reasonable statement being made by a journalist. That
is exactly what is going on: nothing. By the way, do you have a list of
all the grand jurors? That, I do have.

>that Michael Tracy is kind of a dingbat. Hard to believe he is
>a professor.

He did some of the best interviews with this family. Well, he allowed
JonBenet's mother and father to talk. Haven't you seen those interviews?

Patti, what would you say to Patricia, if you could meet her? Without
knowing her, do you feel compassion or care for her; possibly love? I'm
only curious. You do know that she cannot allow herself to trust. Can
you understand that? Do you know what that is like?

I miss JonBenet.

Forwarded Message

Date: 20 May 1999 21:33:51 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Shooting

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

No, that did not happen at Burke's school. Conyers is pretty far
from here. Thanks for your concern. I enjoyed your mail and will
respond in a few hours. I think you will enjoy my response.

Love to You


Forwarded Message

Date: 21 May 1999 02:11:27 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Wait

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Wait for me. I am working on your mail. Meanwhile, I received a
mail from the guy who hates me. He has been talking to Sue
Bennett. He is asking me questions about her.

Always


Forwarded Message

Date: 21 May 1999 03:13:11 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: hi...

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Patti,

I have something to send to you but I can't bring myself to
sending it. It is very similar to the letter I sent to you once,
that almost destroyed our friendship. It is a wonderful letter,
but my trust is at an all time low. I will retain a copy and
might send it someday. I'm sorry I am so strange.

I think my old friend has me a bit upset. His mail tonight was a
little disturbing. He barraged me with questions. I actually
answered his mail.

Love


Forwarded Message

Date: 21 May 1999 16:42:01 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Secrets

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Dear Patti,

Today has been a great day. This family is ever so thankful that
our Burke is safer. What nonsense surrounded the very thought
that he could have killed his sister, of whom he adored. Even the
mail is getting better. Today, I responded to a foxnews.com
address. If you know of Carol McKinley, do tell. I am thinking of
coming out to the press here. If I receive many more nice mails
from people like Carol, I will be tempted. Mistake?: Probably....

The man I spoke to you about is being very kind to me now. He
only wanted to know if this Sue Bennett had actually met me.

I'm sorry I cannot send my latest response to you. Regretfully, I
might be forced to stop these correspondences for at least the
next week. I will try to resume after that. I will also try to
write to you for the next 12 hours.

Love







Forwarded Message

Date: 21 May 1999 18:28:17 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Fox

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Patti,

This morning, I received a mail from Carol McKinley, expressing
that the tabloids should be sued for their reports that Burke was
guilty. I responded to her and thanked her for her letter. I told
her she was the first press person I had heard from here. Though
I might already know her, I acted as if I did not know her. I
think I threw her enough curves to keep her off my back about my
identity. I have a way of diverting attention from that issue. As
with the others, she will either accuse me of being Patricia or
JonBenet's killer.

I have come to the conclusion that I want the press to print my
theories about the killer. Your thoughts? I haven't decided how
to go about doing this, but Carol McKinley might be my liason.
Has she done something I am not aware of? How do you think she
found my quiet little site? Is it true that the press has
knowledge it exists? I have this feeling that she will never
respond to me again. My divisionary tactics turn off most. That
is just as well.

Sincerely


Forwarded Message

Date: 22 May 1999 03:27:15 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Until we meet again.

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Dearest Patti,

This is my last mail for several days. I have been advised to
stay away for the next week. I will mail you when I return. Carol
did not "buy" my story that I did not know her. She responded,
"Remember, we met in December". I responded to her and stated,
"Who could forget Carol McKinley?". Thank you for sending the
latest on her. She has been close to JonBenet's case from the
very beginning. Though I appreciate her concern for Burke, I am
concerned about how she is talking about the rest of us. Can you
understand the appreciation a parent can have for a stranger's
concern for her child; though she just might be an enemy to the
rest of the child's family?

Yes, this means she wrote back to me. Yes, I have talked to her
about leaking my side of the story. No, I have not consulted with
my attorneys but you can bet I will.

I will miss you. This is not goodbye. I will talk to you possibly
by the end of next week.

Love to You



Forwarded Message

Date: 29 May 1999 04:38:12 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Back But Not For Good

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My Dearest,

I am back with you, but not for long. I've missed talking to you.
I hope you have not forgotten me. Nothing is wrong here. I think
I am rid of Carol. I was so hoping I could talk to her. Now, she
is asking me to prove my identity. You know I cannot do that. She
seemed sure of who I was until she requested that I tell her what
I ordered for breakfast the morning we met. My; I cannot remember
that. Furthermore, I refuse to let down my guard. Why can't
anyone understand that revealing my identity would defeat the
very purpose of coming here at all?

Thank you for your thoughtful post. Thank you also for your
concern. Forgive my absence. I regret to inform you that I will
also not be able to communicate with you past the next two days.
I will return. I promise you that.

I have decided that I want to talk to someone who will print my
theory concerning my little girl's murder. I will only do this
in, what I feel is, this safe arena, only. This way, I do not
have to claim any ownership to the words I will speak. I will not
have to deal with legalities that would apply to a live
interview. This is all due to my anonymity here. Carol McKinley
was my only contact with the press. Now she is demanding proof of
my identity. Revealing my identity would destroy all that I have
set out to do here. Now that it seems obvious that Carol wants a
live interview, I am at square one. Maybe it was a poor idea to
begin with.

I hope to hear from you in the next 24 hours. I will not
guarantee that I will be here past tomorrow. I miss you, my
sister.

Love


Forwarded Message

Date: 29 May 1999 17:12:36 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Unwelcome Return

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Patti,

>I am so confused.

Well, I am sorry.

>you want to get your theory out in the public, yet you do not
>want to say who you are. Kind of defeats the purpose, doesn't
>it? I mean if you are someone inside the Ramsey circle, you may
>have information that makes your theory very convincing. Isn't
>that the most important issue here, to get SOMEONE to look in
>the direction that should be investigated?

Yes, yes, and yes. Wouldn't it be just as beneficial if a person
inside the KILLER's circle decided to reveal information as well
as a person who is in the Ramsey circle? Yes, I want someone to
listen. After all, no one has listened so far. At least Hunter
reads Mr. Smit's mail.

>If it takes the media to do it, so be it. Would Carol agree to
>meeting you but keeping your identity secret? Like doing an
>interview with you and you are in a shadow..

Eureka!! I present to you: A SHADOW. That is what this is all
about. This mail address is that shadow. What is wrong with this
shadow? A friend of mine set up this address and assured that it
could not be traced. My mail is encrypted, up to my computer. It
is very anonymous. Why on earth would I go to such great lengths
for anonymity only to tell everyone who writes to me that I am
Patricia Ramsey, John Ramsey, John Andrew Ramsey, Melinda Ramsey,
or JonBenet's killer himself?

>Do you want me to try to convince Carol that you are serious? If
>you send me her email address I will try to convince her that I
>have talked to you for a while now and that I think you are very
>serious and have a very valid theory. It can't hurt.

Yes, I might have you contact her. It is a foxnews.com address.
She types in all small case letters. I have considered that this
might be an intern.

>How are you going to find legitimate media?

I suppose there is no such thing.

>>>>Why can't anyone understand that revealing my identity would
>>>defeat the very purpose of coming here at all?

>I don't understand this at all.

JonBenet's mother cannot afford to say any words, lest they get
twisted as they always do. JonBenet's killer cannot afford to
speak out in the open; moreover, he won't. My theory might draw
him out. Remember the story by Poe?

>What a stupid test, Carol asking what you had for breakfast the
>day she met you, I can't remember what I had for breakfast today
>and I have alot less on my mind than you do.

My sentiments exactly. If anyone knows me; telling her that I do
not remember what I had for breakfast would reveal my identity
alone. I still have not figured out how to deal with her. She
says, knowing my identity is a precautionary measure that is
essential to "protect" both of us. What is that all about?

>Did she really meet you or is she thinking you are someone else?

Of course, she thinks I am Patricia Ramsey. People address mail
to me, "Dear Patsy, Dear Patricia Paugh Ramsey, etc."

>One thing we can do to get your theory out there is I could make
>a web page for it and then post links to it in all the forums
>and send it to Mrs. Brady and all those people.....you would not
>have to claim ownership,

That is a good idea. I would go for that. Do you know Mrs. Brady?
What is she doing on the Internet, if anything?

>I would put it in my name and call it A Friend Of The Ramsey's
>Theory on the Murder of JonBenet Ramsey.

It would probably only get attention if you called it,
"Confessions of JonBenet's Killer". Patti, a confession is the
only hope for finding JonBenet's killer. I firmly believe that.

>You are talking about the theory that you have shared with me,
>right?

Yes, but it is a bit more elaborate than that. It involves a
person who was waiting in the home for the return of JonBenet on
the night of her death. The murder occured in the house. The
description of the killer is the part that I feel is most
important.

I know you get very irritated with me. Why does anonymity upset
people so? After all I have been through, I think I deserve some
anonymity and privacy. I deserve to speak my thoughts without
signing my name, and possibly doing damage to my family in some
way. I think this is an impossible task. I had information I felt
was important. No one is listening. Parts of my theory have been
delivered to the D.A., signed with this e-mail address. They did
not care last September nor do they care now. They are Hell bent
that JonBenet's parents killed her. The only way I could convince
them that my theory is correct, would be to say I am the killer.
That will not happen in my lifetime. JonBenet's killer is
obsessed with attractive, wealthy little girls. He craves their
touch; their very presence. And then, he slowly becomes consumed
with bringing his victim as close to death as possible, without
actually killing her, until she ultimately dies in his arms; now
she is his possession forever. Now, who is going to believe that
description coming from Patricia Ramsey, or anyone for that
matter? I know in my heart that JonBenet's killer was just that.

Sincerely



Forwarded Message

Date: 29 May 1999 22:17:28 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Your Son

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Dear Patti,

Please tell your son that a special friend of yours wishes him a
lovely birthday. No other day can be more special than a sweet
child's birthday.

Sincerely



Forwarded Message

Date: 30 May 1999 01:01:34 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: I'm Back; Hope you are too

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Patti,

I have decided to send a copy of my response to Ms. McKinley. I
hope you forgive me for excerpting from my mail to you. It seemed
so appropriate to send the same to her. I rearranged some of the
words; therefore, I ask you to re-read. I am CERTAIN that this
will rid me of her. She will not want to talk to a person who
will not confirm that she is Patricia Ramsey. I would like any
information you might have heard about her. I know who she is,
but you seem to have your ear to the ground more than I do
concerning news and television coverage. I tend to block that
kind of thing out.

>If you are desperate to get your ideas into the hands of the
>right people, you will have to show that you are a credible
>witness.

So you do not think I can do this anonymously? Why is this case
the exception? Thousands of anonymous tips pour in to other
cases.

>Have you spoken to the lawyers?

Yes I have.

>Mrs.. Brady has the most respected website on the internet
>regarding this case. Yes I do have contact with her.

Send the URL to me, please.

>If you want to send me Carol's address and I will write to her
>and see if I can convince her that you are a legitimate person.

McKinley@FOXNEWS.COM Please do not write to her yet. Never tell
her I have sent anything to you that was first sent to her.

>I don't think she is going to quit bothering you until you give
>her a story of some sort. How did she get this address anyway?

I still do not know how she got my address. You are probably
right about the story.

>Sorry, I don't know the story by Poe. Not much of a reader of
>that kind of work.

The short story is "Tell Tale Heart". Poe's killer has buried his
victim under the floor. When the police come to question him, his
guilt causes him to believe that he can hear his victim's heart
beating louder and louder, until he screams out a confession.

>Carol means to protect HERSELF, not you, when she says this.

I know you are right about this.

>remember, she is a reporter, not your friend.

I am playing with fire....

Burke is fine. If he could survive the beginnings of all this,
he can certainly get through this. Burke is a Ramsey; strong and
quiet.

>are you telling me that you are NOT Patsy Ramsey?

I am telling you nothing.

>I sure hope after all this is over, and believe me, someday it
>will be, that you and I can meet and be just like "normal"
>friends.

That would be nice.

>I just wish they would get on with it and get on the right
>trail.

I believe my theory might help. Do you?

>I don't get irritated with you, no no no, please don't think
>that. I am just trying to understand all this.

Thank you, love.

>Why? What happened in September? When the Grand Jury started?

I sent a series of letters to various people with a scan of my
theory.

Sincerely

**and... still more...

 

Date: 30 May 1999 01:03:52 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Forward: Letter to Carol

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Carol,

Though my address is openly "RAMSEY" @nym.alias.net, maybe you
are not aware that this is an anonymous and untraceable address.
Stating my first name would defeat the purpose of the address. A
very close friend of mine set this account up for me, which
included a very lengthy lesson in encryption. Actually, the
software does all the work. Maybe the best description of this
address would be: "my protective shadow". Here, my words are less
likely to be twisted or misconstrued. And so I will refrain from
stating that I am Patricia Ramsey, John Ramsey, John Andrew
Ramsey, Melinda Ramsey, or even JonBenet's killer himself.

Revealing my identity would defeat the very purpose of coming
here at all. I will will not sign my name to any mail here. Why,
you may ask? Consider this: JonBenet's mother cannot afford to
say any words, lest they get twisted as they always do.
JonBenet's killer cannot afford to speak out in the open;
moreover, he won't. Our talks might draw him out; like Poe's
killer in "Tell Tale Heart".

I assume you will not care to speak to me again because I will
not blatantly reveal my identity to you. Why does anonymity upset
people so? After all I have been through, I think I deserve some
anonymity and privacy. I deserve to speak my thoughts without
signing my name, and possibly doing damage to my family in some
way. I think this is an impossible task. I had information I felt
was important. No one is listening. Parts of my theory have been
delivered to the D.A., signed with this e-mail address. They did
not care last September nor do they care now. They are Hell bent
that JonBenet's parents killed her. The only way I could convince
them that my theory is correct, would be to say I am the killer.
That will not happen in my lifetime. It is my belief that,
JonBenet's killer is obsessed with attractive, wealthy little
girls. He craves their touch; their very presence. And then, he
slowly becomes consumed with bringing his victim as close to
death as possible, without actually killing her, until she
ultimately dies in his arms; becoming his perfect possession
forever. Now, who is going to believe that description coming
from Patricia Ramsey? I know in my heart that JonBenet's killer
was just that.

I wish to continue our talks here, anonymously. I also ask that
you not print my words unless you inform me beforehand. If you
would consider such an arrangement, contact me here. Until such
time that I feel secure that my words are not being misconstrued
in a way that might be damning to myself or my family, I will
deny any connection to this e-mail address, if asked in person.

Sincerely


Forwarded Message

Date: 30 May 1999 01:11:15 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Forward: Mail to Carol

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Carol,

Though my address is openly "RAMSEY" @nym.alias.net, maybe you
are not aware that this is an anonymous and untraceable address.
Stating my first name would defeat the purpose of the address. A
very close friend of mine set this account up for me, which
included a very lengthy lesson in encryption. Actually, the
software does all the work. Maybe the best description of this
address would be: "my protective shadow". Here, my words are less
likely to be twisted or misconstrued. And so I will refrain from
stating that I am Patricia Ramsey, John Ramsey, John Andrew
Ramsey, Melinda Ramsey, or even JonBenet's killer himself.

Revealing my identity would defeat the very purpose of coming
here at all. I will will not sign my name to any mail here. Why,
you may ask? Consider this: JonBenet's mother cannot afford to
say any words, lest they get twisted as they always do.
JonBenet's killer cannot afford to speak out in the open;
moreover, he won't. Our talks might draw him out; like Poe's
killer in "Tell Tale Heart".

I assume you will not care to speak to me again because I will
not blatantly reveal my identity to you. Why does anonymity upset
people so? After all I have been through, I think I deserve some
anonymity and privacy. I deserve to speak my thoughts without
signing my name, and possibly doing damage to my family in some
way. I think this is an impossible task. I had information I felt
was important. No one is listening. Parts of my theory have been
delivered to the D.A., signed with this e-mail address. They did
not care last September nor do they care now. They are Hell bent
that JonBenet's parents killed her. The only way I could convince
them that my theory is correct, would be to say I am the killer.
That will not happen in my lifetime. It is my belief that,
JonBenet's killer is obsessed with attractive, wealthy little
girls. He craves their touch; their very presence. And then, he
slowly becomes consumed with bringing his victim as close to
death as possible, without actually killing her, until she
ultimately dies in his arms; becoming his perfect possession
forever. Now, who is going to believe that description coming
from Patricia Ramsey? I know in my heart that JonBenet's killer
was just that.

I wish to continue our talks here, anonymously. I also ask that
you not print my words unless you inform me beforehand. If you
would consider such an arrangement, contact me here. Until such
time that I feel secure that my words are not being misconstrued
in a way that might be damning to myself or my family, I will
deny any connection to this e-mail address, if asked in person.

Sincerely


Forwarded Message

Date: 30 May 1999 16:58:40 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: ?

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Patti,

Did you receive my mails last night? I sent two mails to you. One
was a forwarded mail that I wrote to Carol. What have I done?

Sincerely



Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: "Midnite" <bgraves@lcc.net>
Subject: Mune 1-10 letters
Date: Sun, 3 Oct 1999 22:21:49 -0500

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Forwarded Message

Date: 5 Jun 1999 04:19:49 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Hi

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I would like to hear from you. For good reason, I have not
accessed my other address since we talked last. Please tell me
what has been happening. I would like to talk to you about
JonBenet. Have you heard from Ms. McKinley?

Oh yes, write here only.

Your Ramsey Friend



Forwarded Message

Date: 5 Jun 1999 05:00:45 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: once more

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Hi,

This has been so difficult; only to talk to you for 72 hours.
Please reply if it works.

Ramsey Friend


Forwarded Message

Date: 5 Jun 1999 17:14:29 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: My Deepest Apologies

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I am so sorry about dropping out of the picture like I have. I
wrote a nice letter to you that was never sent. I will make every
attempt to send it to you. I am safe. I thank you for your
concern.

I have written a letter to you about a recent visit to JonBenet's
grave. I was allowed almost an hour of uninterrupted visitation
with my little one. I noticed a new grave to the rear of her
grave. I went to it and picked up a flower arrangement that had
blown over in the previous rainstorm. I went back to the little
bench beside her grave and talked to her and Beth. The small
flowers that were planted at the foot of both their graves (at
the base of Beth's headstone), are in bloom. I fear the cold this
winter will kill them. The flowers previously placed along the
sides of JonBenet's marble covering were removed and replaced
with strips of grass that seem to be taking well to the earth.

That visit was so sweet. In that small grave, the secrets of that
fateful night are held. If JonBenet could speak in the spirit as
did Beth; the answer would be known to the world.

My love to you, Patti. If anything has happened since I have been
away; please tell me.

Sincerely



Forwarded Message

Date: 6 Jun 1999 16:05:21 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: hi

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

Thank you for saying I am wise. Sometimes I wonder if anyone
thinks that of me.

The letter that I typed to you mostly revolves around the visit
to JonBenet's grave. It is on another computer. I thought you
might respond to my short mail yesterday. Have you had a chance
to visit JonBenet's grave? It will change your perspective on
this whole situation. It is a quiet and peaceful place. While the
world is talking about her; none of it can be heard when I stand
beside her.

Just now, I awakened from a strange dream. John was in my dream. I
brought up JonBenet. Everytime I said anything about her, he cried.
Finally, I told him I was sorry and held his arm.

I will try to retrieve the mail now.

Sincerely



Forwarded Message

Date: 6 Jun 1999 16:57:29 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Let Us Focus on JonBenet

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I dropped my previous account. This is my new address, hopefully
more anonynmous and confidential. I want you to have this letter.
Do you think your group might be interested in reading it? Don't
post it now. I have also sent a copy of this to Ms.McKinley.
-Grieving

Recently, I went to JonBenet. I was allowed almost an hour of
uninterrupted visitation with my little one. I noticed a new
grave to the rear of her grave. I went to it and picked up a
flower arrangement that had blown over in the previous rainstorm.
I went back to the little bench beside her grave and talked to
her and Beth. The small flowers that were planted at the foot of
both their graves (at the base of Beth's headstone), are in
bloom. I fear the cold this winter will kill them. The flowers
previously placed along the sides of JonBenet's marble covering
were removed and replaced with strips of grass that seem to be
taking well to the earth.

I must admit that I find myself looking toward the front gates,
thinking I am hearing an approaching car. As I sit on the small
bench beside her grave, to the rear of me, behind a fence, there
are magnolia trees. The falling magnolia leaves have the sound of
someone walking as they fall. Yes, I am a bit concerned sometimes
that I am being watched.

Aside from all that, I had a sweet visit with my little girl. As
I sat beside JonBenet, I talked to her. It is hard to fathom that
her little body is only a few feet away from me. Prior to my
arrival, there had been a beating rain. Her little stone and
marble overlay were wet. Soon after I arrived, the sun came out
and slowly dried the water off her grave; though it could not dry
my tears.

After leaving her grave, I headed toward Atlanta, passing
Peachtree Presbyterian on my way. My, how our church has grown. A
lot has happened in that building; weddings and funerals. I
cannot believe we have lost Dr. Harrington. The church triggers
an array of memories; from weddings and happy times, to funerals
and sad times. Unfortunately, today, the church triggers memories
of JonBenet's funeral.

It was sweet to spend an uninterrupted hour with JonBenet and
Beth. There, I can talk to JonBenet and Beth, as well as to God.
While the world is buzzing about the case, she lies in a quiet
and peaceful place. In that small grave, the secrets of that
fateful night are held. If JonBenet could speak in the spirit as
did Beth; the answer would be known to the world.

Grieving





Forwarded Message

Date: 6 Jun 1999 22:26:45 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: No Response

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

Did you send your response to my other address. I cannot read
that mail at this time. If you want me to read your responses,
you must send them here. If you have sent your responses to the
other address, I will not see them.

Sincerely



Forwarded Message

Date: 7 Jun 1999 05:09:53 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Sweetness

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I am glad you read my mail. I sent that one to Ms. McKinley. My
sources tell me, there were a blurb of mails sent to the other
address today. I cannot access those, as of yet.

My sweetness, who is it you think you are talking to? Carol
thinks I am Patricia Ann. I have grown to trust you. You have
been sweet a loyal to me.

My dream about John was very vivid. I was riding with him in his
old truck. He was happy when I first got in. Then I asked him to
talk about JonBenet. I asked him to recall the best description
of JonBenet. When he hesitated, I reminded him that she was so
energetic and caring. His face started to crumble as he cried. I
felt so sorry for him. I consoled him by reaching out and holding
to his arm. He hurts more than he appears to. Did you know that
John pronounces JonBenet using the hard "J" sound mostly? He is a
special person; very loving and affectionate with all his
children.

I hope you were able to vicariously visit with my baby as I
described it to you. A visit to her grave is priceless. She is
definitely with you when you visit her.

Somewhere, her killer lurks. He is looking for a new rich,
attractive little girl.

Sincerely


Forwarded Message

Date: 8 Jun 1999 02:50:00 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Your Letter was so Sweet

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dear Patti,

I am overwhelmingly exhausted tonight. I finally accessed all my
past mails. Carol is interested and has been interested in
talking to me. Her answers are not more than a sentence or two.
Then, I suppose she is listening.

The mean person who has bothered me in the past is up to his old
tricks. It seems that a person named Susan sent one of my mails
to her where I talked about him; to him personally. Does that
make sense? I hope so. Anyway, He insists that I have signed my
name to my mails to him. I will simply deny it. He is threatening
to expose my mail to him to the press. Oh well, I don't care. I
would rather he would not ramble on to them about who he thinks I
am. He is dangerous and likes to play games with me. He addresses
all his mail to me as "Dear Patricia".

I am glad that you can tell I am a person who has deep love for
JonBenet. That would fit a host of people who knew her or,
otherwise, only met her. As the key part of my theory; I contend
that her killer was just as close to her as her mother. Carol
McKinley has stopped asking me who I am. My new address is
practically unconnected to JonBenet's family. Yes, it stands for
something, but I doubt anyone can decipher the acronym: AXD. You
haven't figured it out, have you?

I got an e-mail from the website owner at find a grave. He says
JonBenet is still among the most visited sections of his page,
and wanted to know if I am still at the same address. Strange, as
if someone wants me to use the old address....

I loved your last precious mail. I am sorry I cannot tell you who
I am. John is sweet. Patricia Ann loved her baby. John Andrew is
deep and sensitive. Melinda knows her Dad so well. Then there is
Lucinda, who is sweeter than sweet. I would love to accept any of
the above titles. Unfortunately, JonBenet's murderer might share
all the above attributes. I suppose that is why I have been
accused of being him. I believe he is a person that children find
sweet and endearing. I believe he is a very charismatic person.

My Love to You



Forwarded Message

Date: 8 Jun 1999 04:09:13 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: More About JonBenet's Killer

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Dearest,

I am relaxing tonight after a bit of a trip. I have been
traveling a lot lately. I am just so tired from being in a car.

>Carol still wants to talk to you, this is good....Is she willing
>to do so under your condition of anonymity

Yes. She says she has no problem with it. I am a little annoyed
with her small case letters and her triteness. She seems OK. I am
trying to allow myself to open up to her. Do you think she wants
a story?

>Why don't you just ignore the letters from the mean man? Don't
>even open them, he does not have your new address so just close
>down the old one

The old address is still in operation. My friend, who set it up,
allowed me to read some week old mail. Well, he didn't allow me;
we just made contact again after the big switch to the new
address. I might use the old one again someday. I certainly want
to keep getting the messages from the site.

>AXD....no, I have not idea what it may stand for. X is probably
>for Christ, I would assume. Maybe Christmas? you are sure good
>at keeping me guessing at things.

No, the X is not for Christ. It is an acronym that stands for
something that would be a link; however, I doubt it will be
discovered. Someone would have to dig deep. Then again, I do not
know what is out there.

>Webmaster form Find A Grave probably just updating his site and
>wanting to keep it current.

I think it was a little more than that. Don't you find it a
little strange that he is asking about my address immediately
after I set up my new account? I think Carol is communicating
with him; So be it. I am ready to talk and I don't care if Carol
prints it. It would be the first glimpse of anything remotely
realistic. I would like to change "Friends of the Ramseys" to
"Friend of JonBenet". What do you think? "Best Friend of
JonBenet" would be even better. Furthermore, I would love for him
to post my letter about my last visit right under the picture of
her grave.

>I don;t understand why you can't tell me who you are.

It is dangerous to do that for me. I'm sorry. Allow your
conscience to be your guide.

>Can I ask you a question? On JonBenet's grave it says she died
>on Dec.25th. How did you come to that conclusion? I would have
>thought Dec. 26th would have been more accurate.

She died on Christmas night, hence, that is the only date that
the family feels should be recorded on her gravestone. JonBenet
died on Christmas night.

>You said you were exhausted tonight. Any special reason? Tell me
>about YOU and the things you like to do, how you spend your day.

You would not be interested. I will say that I do not dwell on
JonBenet all the time. I love her and she is with me; however, I
am still a supportive friend. I visit my friends when they are in
the hospital. I still try to help those who need it. I try to be
there for those who need to be consoled; those who have lost the
same thing I have lost. I have a busy schedule.

>Do you like gardening? I get frustrated with it so easily. I
>looked at all those stupid weeds today and just said to myself,
>I am not going to spend my time out here pulling those danged
>things out, let them be there.

Hire a gardener, darling.

>now you have me confused again.....
>>>>John is sweet. Patricia Ann loved her baby. John Andrew is
>deep and sensitive. Melinda knows her Dad so well. Then there is
>Lucinda, who is sweeter than sweet. I would love to accept any
>of the above titles. Unfortunately, JonBenet's murderer might
>share all the above attributes.

>you think the killer could have loved JonBenet, been deep and
>sensitive, known John well, and is sweet? Not the picture I
>would draw of my daughter's killer, not by any means. I am
>sure I am misinterupting this, please explain what you meant.

You don't know just how important this is to the case. This is
the very essence of the case. This is why the world believes
JonBenet's family did this crime. They can see the connection,
yet they are confusing themselves by thinking that the family is
guilty. JonBenet's killer loved her too much. As John once said,
"Her killer cared for her". As John Andrew once said in response
to the question, "What would you do if you could meet JonBenet's
killer?" John Andrew replied, "I would forgive him."

I think I should send excerpts of this mail to Carol. Your
talkshow friend might help me convey my message as well. For the
first time, I want the world to hear me. Here, it can be done
safely.

Love to You



Forwarded Message

Date: 8 Jun 1999 23:12:17 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: A Little Hectic

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Dearest Patti,

I always hate not to get to your mails. I will have more time tonight.
I did write to Carol, today, between stops. She is writing more to me
now. One letter was large. She seems to really care for the Ramsey
family, though she has not said she thinks anyone is innocent, with the
exception of Burke. My letter to her today was huge. I sent you a copy of
my last mail to her last night. Did you get it?

>Did you get some much needed rest?

Yes. I think I actually slept 7 hours last night.

>I hope so because I am very inquisitive this morning. You shared >alot
of information with me last night and of course, I have >questions.

I like answering your questions. I am glad you found my mail
informative.

>Well of course she wants a story, she is a reporter.

She has informed me that she is not looking for an interview, but is
just interested in the outcome of it all, since she has been close to it.
She said she did not care if she did not arrive at the "big get",
meaning the answer to the puzzle. I told her I would try to help her with
the "big get".

>From what I have been able to find out about her, she believes >the
Ramsey's are innocent.

Thank you so much for all you are doing. This helps.

>I have a friend who is able to watch her telecasts and she says >she
is good.

I relayed that to her in my last mail. She has not responded to it yet.
I was a bit braver in my last mail; describing the killer with greater
detail. I also mentioned the possibility of her getting some of this
info to the public, hesitating and assuring her that it did not matter to
me if she did or not. After all, I could have gone to the press (don't
trust them) long ago but I was afraid they would twist my words. Back
to, "Damned if I do and damned if I don't".

>Am I correct in assuming this man is your lawyer? I can't think >of
any other reason someone could control you.

No. The person who set up my computer is, shall we say: a computer
expert. He is not retaining me; he was merely protecting me. I have access
to both accounts. I am just not using the other one now.

>Now this is the second time in this case that an acronym has >come up.
What do you think the SBTC stands for?

Oh God, I cannot do anything right when it comes to this case. I did
not notice that until you pointed it out. Thank you. Now you see why I
feel that I am damned either way. You will not be the last to point that
out. Ultimately, someone will say AXD is simply the ransom note writer,
aka Patricia Ann. My source assures me that the address is not
traceable.

>It is dangerous to do that for me. I'm sorry. Allow your=20
>conscience to be your guide. My conscience or my intuition?

Sorry about that. I was so tired when I typed that. Let your heart be
your guide. Like I told Carol, rest assured, I am a person who still
loves JonBenet very very much.

>I just looked at a copy of the autopsy report, which is on line >at Do
you think this is incorrect?

It should also state that the exact time of death was unknown. That is
what I understand it to say. In my heart, I know she died on Christmas
night.

>OJ Simspon in an interview said "If I killed Nicole, it would be
>because I loved her too much"

Wow, that is a great comparison.

>I find it also very odd that John Andrew said he would forgive >the
killer.

The bible says, if we cannot forgive, how can we expect forgiveness. To
hate is counter-productive and destructive.

>I think alot of people perceive this as yet more proof that the
>family is not reacting how they think they should.

JonBenet's family is Christian; hence, we forgive as we ask to be
forgiven. Of course, the cruel world would never understand such a concept
of goodness.

>I am so glad I have you to talk to about this, no one else seems >to
understand things the way I see them.

That is so sweet, Patti. I hope you will still love me no matter what
happens.

Love to You

Forwarded Message

Date: 9 Jun 1999 01:59:38 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Doubt..

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Patti,

How are you tonight, sweet sister? It is nice to talk to you this
night.

>>>>>That is so sweet, Patti. I hope you will still love me no
>>>>matter what
>>>>happens.

>There is NOTHING that would make me turn against you. Nothing.

Thank you. Had I not read this at the end, I would have sworn
that you are having doubts. Especially after I read the first
part of your mail. I assure you that there is one thing that
would change that NOTHING into something.

>I hate to bring this up, and if you don't want to talk about it,
>I'll understand but I don't see how you can think that JonBenet
>was killed Christmas night.

Patti, Christmas night was the last night of JonBenet's life;
hence, it is the night she died. Do you know how awful it is to
put your little girl to bed one night and never see her alive
again? I claim our last time with her as the last time she was
alive. It is mine and no one else may take it away from me.

>I can't understand why the Ramsey's put Dec 25 on the grave. It
>just doesn't make sense, she could NOT have been dead on Dec 25.
>Besides that, given a choice of dates why would someone choose
>Christmas Day as a reminder of their child's death.
>I guess I am not qualified to answer, but this is another one of
>those little things that make the Ramsey's look questionable.

That comment along with the one about John Andrew's words about
forgiveness, is a bit hurtful. Oh, I do not hold you accountable.
After all, it is the view of the whole country. So far, you have
found several things in the last 24 hours that make the Ramseys
look guilty; including my acronym. Thank goodness you reassured
me at the end of your letter; otherwise, I would have thought you
had changed your views toward JonBenet's family. Doubt is natural
and very old. Recall the experience Jesus had at the end. Peter
denied his Lord. Before you think I am equating myself to Jesus;
please be rest assured that my self-esteem has not been where it
once was for a long time running.

>Another thing I am extremely curious about is this TimeLine that
>Sue Bennet has put up? Where did she get all this personal
>information.

Maybe she can answer that.

>If she is not getting this information from inside the Ramsey
>family, how does she know all this?

Maybe Carol knows her better than we do.

I will remind you as well: Nothing will change how I feel about
you. Though Hell itself descends down on me, I will forever love
my friends and family. Recently, I thought of death and how it
would not be that bad. At least I could be with my precious
daughter.

Sincerely


Forwarded Message

Date: 9 Jun 1999 02:35:36 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Dearest

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Sweet Sister,

>Part of me asks simply because when people ask me questions when
>I am defending the Ramsey's, I have no answers of my own.
>Talking to you helps me understand that horrible night and also
>helps me answer their questions.

I will help you any way I can. Ask any question. I will answer
you. I just want you to understand that it will not coincide with
the things you have heard thus far.

I thank you for your defense. I will add that, if she were alive,
JonBenet would thank you as well. She loved her family. Goodness,
she loved everyone. It was always so hard to believe that so many
wonderful qualities could have existed in such a little girl. Oh
God, I miss that child. God help me, I want her back so bad. I
want to hold her sweet little body in my arms. I want to kiss her
precious face, all over. I want to smell her hair and feel the
softness of her skin as I whisper, "I love you", into her ear.
She would giggle if I did that; then, I could hear her golden
laughter. We must talk more of JonBenet. I do not desire
vengeance; I want JonBenet back. I feel so selfish when I say
that. I say that to her at her grave. I really believe she can
hear me. Oh how sweet it is to talk to my baby.

>Do you realize you revealed to me who you are?
>Thank you.

Oh my goodness, what ARE you talking about, Patti? What sort of
blunder have I made this time? I am so exhausted. I must be more
careful. Carol is now back to wondering who I am, just the way I
like it.

>Now let's solve this case.
>What can I do to help?

You are doing it. Maybe you could help me find someone who will
publish my theory. Then again, I think it might get back to me. I
am so confused. You see, I do not think anyone will believe a
single word I say. Yes you can help clear my thoughts on this.

Love to You

Forwarded Message

Date: 10 Jun 1999 00:54:37 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Disappointment

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Dearest Patti,

I have been in close contact with Carol McKinley for the past two
days. She says she will not air my theory unless it can be backed
up with hard proof. Also, she says I am not a credible source
unless I prove that I am Patricia Ann Ramsey. I was very close to
thinking that I might have an impact on changing the direction of
this case. Now, I feel defeated. I will share my theory with
Carol but I have no faith that anything will come of it. As she
stated, "Unless the theory can be proven to come from Patsy
Ramsey or some other credible source, it will fall by the
wayside." How could my being JonBenet's mother give me any
authority to have knowledge of who killed her? Just another
pitfall. I am so depressed now, Patti. On top of that, strangely,
Carol quoted something I only sent to you last night: the words,
"hold her little body once more". Are you corresponding with
Carol? Please be honest. It is ok if you are. I just need to
know. I was wrong about her not thinking I am JonBenet's mother:
it appears that she does. Now, the focus is on whether the family
is moving or not. She did a responsible news story on it last
night, she told me. Did you know that there is a camera pointed
directly at the house, 24 hours a day?? That is so disturbing.
Even though I do send my theory to her, she will not be checking
her mail until Monday of next week. Time is of the essence.

I have not heard from you today. P.S. Does that Brady URL belong
to Shirley Brady?? It was terrible.

Love to You


Forwarded Message

Date: 10 Jun 1999 02:13:56 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Depression

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Patti,

How are you? How are the kids? I am not feeling so well tonight.
I think I am not getting enough sleep.

You did not repond to everything I said in my last mail. I
imagine you did that on purpose. It is just as well to be left
unsaid. Tonight, I feel depressed.

After I received Carol's mail, tears began to flow for my
daughter. I know now that it is useless to speak as myself, or
anonymously; in hopes to redirect this case. It is hopeless, and
my tears flow because I have failed. I cannot succeed with this
as JonBenet's mother or as anyone else besides the killer
himself. From the very beginning, her mother voiced that she felt
a madman was loose. It did not make a difference then and will
not make a difference now. No one sees this like I do.

Your ideas were good but I fear airing my theory in such a
fashion. I am afraid it will not be taken seriously unless it is
aired by the press; not the tabloids, although they would jump at
the chance. On the other hand, I would like to put a picture of
JonBenet's grave up and caption it with my last visit account. I
think the only way the press would hold any creedence to anything
that was said would have to be sent in the words of the killer
himself. It would be my theory in his own words. That is so
dangerous, but I want this theory to leak so bad now. At first, I
did not see the importance, but after talking to Carol, I think
this could turn the investigation around. Should I start signing
off, Patricia Ann? Would that matter? If anyone ever contacted me
in person, I just know I would panic and deny I had anything to
do with this whole thing. I know it would turn into a "damned if
I do". I am concerned for my family as well.

Thanks for sticking by me. You are about the only person I still
talk to here. I get mail and never answer it. I am tired and
depressed. I only have energy to talk to you and Carol at this
point. Write tonight if you can.

Love to You


Forwarded Message

Date: 10 Jun 1999 03:14:42 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Goodnight

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Dearest Patti,

I think your idea about the pageants was a great one. I just
thought the connection with Carol McKinley was the best. I
actually think it is just as nice that I seem to be making
friends with her. She is really very sweet to me.

The mean man you refer to already has all the hints he needs to
send his info to the tabloids. He has signed mail from me. I will
deny I ever signed those mails. After all, he could have easily
have signed the names himself. I realize I am slipping. I am
getting tired; maybe lazy. I still don't know what I am doing
that is alerting you of anything. Thanks for the warning.

I will talk to you tomorrow. My love to you, sweet sister.

Sincerely




Forwarded Message

Date: 10 Jun 1999 21:33:41 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Not Giving Up

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Dear Patti,

I thought of something strange today. It involved a situation
that revolved around a reporter and an anonymous tipper. If I am
not mistaken, the reporter was Mike Wallace of CBS news. The
tipper had the nickname, "Deep Throat". It was all about the
Watergate break-in, if I am not mistaken. What is the difference
in that situation and the one between myself and Carol McKinley?
I must get more facts on how this was conducted.

I guess you see, I really have not given up. I think I will start
working on my theory and polish it to a finished product before I
send it to Carol, as a formal statement. Of course, I will not
sign it; however, I will make it evident that I am close to
JonBenet.

Sincerely



Forwarded Message

Date: 11 Jun 1999 00:53:43 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: hi

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Patti,

I went to your discussion board on Yahoo. I know you are online
today. Why are you not talking to me. What's up?

Sincerely


Forwarded Message

Date: 11 Jun 1999 00:55:40 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: That Board....

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Patti,

>They go to the Peachtree Luthern Church, maybe they want to be
>close to it.

Who are you talking about?

**okay - let me know look to see if I have anymore saved...

 

actually... these letters look like they are BEFORE the ones I just posted... sorry if they are NOT in order! LOL!

Date: 14 Aug 1999 18:48:58 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: More About This

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Patti,

>He has people convinced you are Patsy Ramsey and that you also
>wrote the ransom note, he compares your letters that you write
>to him with the ransom note.

This is what I have been told. I have not received any mail from
anyone as a result of his postings. The last letter that was
released to the public from our family, was written by John.
Collins even insists that I wrote that letter as well. Once, he
said I did not spell the word "rediculous" correctly proving I
was not Patricia Ramsey. I think those forums need to see a lettr
of his like the one you hold. That would certainly disprove that
he and I are friends.

> He also claims that you have mailed him a letter using real
>mail.

Absolutely not. I have not sent any such mail to anyone.

>I just thought you should know that you ( as the writer of
>letters claiming to be Patsy) are being talked about on at least
>two forums.

I thank you for that, Patti. It bothers me but it is certainly
nothing new to me.

>In one forum I stuck up for you so they kicked me out.

Thank you so much for taking my part. I will always consider you
a friend of the Ramseys.

Patricia

Post Script: It is very nice to hear from you again....




Forwarded Message

Date: 24 Aug 1999 16:45:00 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Patti, this is not right.

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Patti,

I DO NOT look at any boards and certainly do not write to anyone
named GoldaBob. You have no right sending this kind of mail to
me. I request that you cease sending them to me. Why don't you
direct things like this to people like Jim Collins. The person
you speak of had NEVER received a mail from any of my accounts.

>Obviously you lurk on the yahoo board, what I want to know is
>how you got GoldaBob's email address at work? She is very
>freaked out about it.

>Patti



Forwarded Message

Date: 24 Aug 1999 20:09:27 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: READ

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This original mail was sent to this address. I merely responded
to it. All mail sent to ramsey@nym.alias.net is answered. I have
no knowledge of your board. All mail received and sent from this
address is archived as was the mail sent below. I have left all
header information intact.

SEE BELOW

Received: by nym.alias.net with unique id 4kLhOirRXFkYWA for
<ramsey@nym.alias.net>; Tue Aug 17 17:26:46 1999 +0000 (GMT)
X-From: fortus@worldnet.att.net Tue Aug 17 17:26:45 1999
Received: from mtiwmhc04.worldnet.att.net (204.127.131.39) (HELO
mtiwmhc04.worldnet.att.net)
by anon.lcs.mit.edu with SMTP; Tue, 17 Aug 1999 17:26:45
+0000
Received: from wanda-s ([12.77.82.74]) by
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(InterMail v03.02.07.07 118-134) with ESMTP
id <19990817172544.GKGI1124@wanda-s> for
<ramsey@nym.alias.net>;
Tue, 17 Aug 1999 17:25:44 +0000
From: "Fortus Technologies" <fortus@worldnet.att.net>
To: <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
Subject: JonBenet's Step Sister
Date: Tue, 17 Aug 1999 12:25:53 -0500
X-MSMail-Priority: Normal
X-Priority: 3
X-Mailer: Microsoft Internet Mail 4.70.1155
MIME-Version: 1.0
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Message-Id: <19990817172544.GKGI1124@wanda-s>

How did SHE die????




Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: "mame" <mamensadie@yahoo.com>
Subject: the latest letters
Date: Sat, 9 Oct 1999 14:52:17 -0500

HTML Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]


Forwarded Message

Date: 24 Aug 1999 16:45:00 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Patti, this is not right.

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I DO NOT look at any boards and certainly do not write to anyone
named GoldaBob. You have no right sending this kind of mail to
me. I request that you cease sending them to me. Why don't you
direct things like this to people like Jim Collins. The person
you speak of had NEVER received a mail from any of my accounts.

>Obviously you lurk on the yahoo board, what I want to know is
>how you got GoldaBob's email address at work? She is very
>freaked out about it.

>Patti



Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
Subject: hello
Date: Wed, 6 Oct 1999 18:51:10 -0500

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Hello Patricia;
I have been thinking of you lately and thought I would drop you a line
to
see how you are doing.
It must be a very hard time for you with the closing of the Grand Jury
just
weeks away now.

Did you ever find out anything else about that horrible Collins man? He
has
been posting on the Internet alot of stuff about you. I don't read it
much
but I have friends that do and tell me about it. I think he is a
dangerous
person, I hope he has left you alone but from the sounds of it, he is
still
harassing you.

How have you been? I think of you often.

Please write back when you have a chance,
Patti




Forwarded Message

Date: 7 Oct 1999 00:24:01 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: At Long Last; We Meet Again

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Dear Patti,

I've missed you so. I miss talking to Carol as well. I feel,
sometimes, that I have lost my secret sisters. I miss the
conscientious letters you both sent; I miss the attentiveness you
both showed to me during my dilemma. I know that I will never
hear from Carol again. I sealed my own fate. I am human;
therefore, I am weak. I felt as though the whole world was
pressing down on me; I felt a loyalty to my family. I am so sorry
that things ended as they did.

Your name came up last week. It is my understanding that several
people on the Internet have been talking of our relationship. I
do not appreciate it. It was said that you believe me to be who I
say I am. I replied that this could not be you as I felt I had
lost your confidence.

It also seems that the Internet, much like the press, is going in
a totally wrong direction. There is talk that a man has been
identified in Colorado, in connection with this account. That is
rediculous. My contacts assure me that the nym.alias.net server
is nowhere near Colorado. I fear they are speaking of Collins. He
did not murder JonBenet. I cannot say that I know who murdered my
child; though, I have a strong feeling that I know him now.

Concerning the grand jury: I will not give up when all is said
and done there. This case can still be solved long after the
close of the grand jury hearings. This killer cannot, nor will he
be, apprehended. He must be led to a confession. He must
voluntarily come forth. If the press and the police would proceed
with that fact in mind, and therefore, use approaches that lead
to that end; this would progress at a much faster pace. My
statement would have been a means to that end.

How have you been, Patti? I also think of you often. I think of
Carol often as well. I have not given up my fight. I am in
contact with new people who are listening. When I lost Carol, I
fell back for a few weeks; but then, like Phoenix, I arose from
the ashes with even more determination to convey the urgency of
my message to my daughter's killer. I will not stop until I
succeed.

Patti, I care for you still. I am tired and so depressed. I still
speak to my mysterious friend. He is still close to both JonBenet
and to me. There have been times when I have considered that he
he might be innocent; therefore, classified a dear friend to my
family - a friend and guardian to my little girl. Then, I realize
that he might be another man entirely.

Never forget, Patti - I care for you. I miss you.

Patricia Ramsey



Forwarded Message

Date: 7 Oct 1999 22:23:21 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Patti

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Patti,

Thank you for your confidence in my identity. Though it might be
viewed as a small token compared to the outcome I desired from
the correspondences on the Internet, I still find it very
comforting. I cannot really say that I had any expectations from
all this. I fell into this situation, as you know. As I said to
another person I grew close to; if anyone confirmed that I was
not who I said I was, it was I. Sometimes when things start to
roll too quickly, panic sets in. The considerations one makes
when making plans, scream much louder when one faces the reality
and the consequences one might receive as a result of it coming
to fruition. Returning to the orginal intent of this paragraph -
it is so good to talk to you again and, better yet, to know you
still care for me as I do for you.

There still exists a mail that was sent to Carol that best
describes what I feel I have explained time and time again - the
reason I cannot present myself in the way I am expected to
present myself. I am tempted to send those words I said to her,
over to you. I always assured her that I would never send my
messages to her, on to someone else; however, I see nothing in my
letter to her that would violate our trust. After further
deliberation, I will submit it to you.

I did not send a signed letter through the U.S. mail to this Mr.
Collins. During the time I have been here, I have sent one, and
only one, letter bearing a signature. No, I do not hear from him
anymore. It is my understanding that he does not believe me to be
who I claim to be; but instead, believes me to be the writer of
the ransom note.

I think the people will decide, having viewed ex Detective Arndt,
how her account should be summed up. I understand that, recently,
Mr. Tracey defended my husband in regards to her inuendos. I
personally thanked him for that. I have no comment how I feel
about ex Detective Arndt. Of course, my attorneys speak for me. I
will allow you to discern my opinion of her from what I have just
said.

It is nice to communicate with you once more. I will refrain from
telling you anything further that is said by my mysterious
contact. He lives.

Patricia Ramsey



Forwarded Message

Date: 9 Oct 1999 04:01:14 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Complete Explanation

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Patti,

My time here is coming to a close. Today, I suffered a new blow -
one I will not recover from. I have failed once more. I have
given so much of myself only to get nothing in return. It is too
draining on me to continue. I must let this go. I have revealed
my statement to two prominent journalists; I have failed on both
counts. No one understands nor seems to care about my position. I
am only reprimanded from every side as to how I have done
something wrong. I have done nothing wrong. I have only done what
I am capable of doing under the circumstances. As God gave me
strength to reveal these awful secrets concerning my daughter's
death; I pray that he will also give me that same strength to let
this go. It is difficult to let go but I must.

Below is the message I spoke of. Do not allow anyone else to read
it, please. It explains everything. It is also all I know to say
to convince any person that I have done all I can do, under the
circumstances. This was not my final letter to Carol - that came
many letters after this one.


BEGIN:

I want to explain my illusiveness and evasiveness. Carol, I am so
very afraid. It is to be acknowledged that the killer composed a
ransom note. I still feel it was only a diversionary tactic;
however, it was still composed by her killer. In it, the killer
threatened us. Those words have stayed with me. He warned us that
if we spoke to anyone, like the police or FBI, it would result in
the death of my child. He listed everyone and everything. He also
stated that the people watching over JonBenet hated us. He also
warned that he was watching us and the authorities closely. This
would include anyone I talk to; including you. Yes, we
disregarded these threats at first. What parent could sit
patiently without contacting the police when their child is
missing? Certainly not us. But now, in the aftermath, it must be
considered that this family is in danger; that this killer might
make good on his threats; that this killer might be the person I
speak to now.

Carol, I am terrified. I am afraid for my family. Had you proven
my identity, I feared you might pursue it if I lost my nerve in
the end. Please do not think I planned to do that to you. I did
not. You see Carol, I just wanted that letter to reach her killer
so bad. I would cross the other bridge when I came to it. Maybe,
by the time my letter hit the press, he would come forth and I
would be safe. Then, we could celebrate together, in person.

There will come a day when Hell itself will not stop you from
printing my appeal to JonBenet's killer. You hold my secret and
my safety in your hands. If the timing is just right, we can
snare this person before me or my family are in harm's way.

Carol, since this has happened, I have tried so hard to make some
peace with my little girl. I feel somewhat responsible for her
death. Last night, as the sun set and the night fell, I spoke out
loud to her. There are times when I feel her presence. Last
night, I felt her closeby.

And to her, I said, "Please my sweetness, forgive me. I have
failed you. I am afraid. You know I would do anything for you,
now as always. But, I am weak; afraid. There are people who have
made promises to me; to hurt me; to hurt our family. And so, I
cannot do what I know is right. At this point, I feel helpless.
My attempt to plead with your killer has failed because I am so
afraid. Please forgive me. Please forgive me for failing you; not
once, but endlessly. Why must my hands be bound so that I cannot
defend my sweet baby's honor. Oh how I love you. I miss you so
much. No amount of doubt can take away the sweetest title I have
ever held; JonBenet Patricia Ramsey's mother. And now, I come to
you for forgiveness. I am so sorry, my little one."

I only wish you could understand the Hell that is going on around
me. At least I was able to just talk to you for a time. I was
allowed to tell you some of this Hell that has been described to
me by Satan himself. I have decided to shift my prayers from him
to the little girls he seeks. God help them all. If no appeal is
made to him, there is no hope. I have prepared for the worst. You
hold the only appeal to him, written by me.

Carol, we must do something. There are other things to do until
you reveal my letter. You still have not talked to the above
referred to. Carol, I have a renewed faith in you. The world will
see my letter. It must. Regardless of any breakdown we might
have, a killer is loose and seeking another child. There must be
a way.

Patricia Ramsey

END

Of course, that "breakdown" between Carol and me, came in August.
I made one more attempt recently with another person. Tonight, I
feel confident that it too failed. I am sorry if you still do not
understand my position. There are people close to me who
understand this completely and will continue to understand as
long as they care for me and my family.

Patricia Ramsey



Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: Oct 10-Oct20
Date: Thu, 21 Oct 1999 11:46:23 -0500

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Forwarded Message

Date: 11 Oct 1999 02:55:59 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Short Message

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I am not upset with you for telling your friend about me. I will
contact her this evening. I appreciate your help. Thank you,
Patti. I will talk more to you after I contact this new friend.
Tell me as much about her as you can.

Patricia




Forwarded Message

Date: 11 Oct 1999 03:48:15 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Contact Made

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

A mail has been sent to Mame. My sources have confirmed that she
is, indeed, in Boulder. I told her that I just lost a very
wonderful journalist friend here. At the very moment I lost
contact with him, you sent her to me. I told Mame that maybe god
had his hand in this. I don't want to get my hopes up. Thank you,
Patti.

Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 13 Oct 1999 03:14:44 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Pray For Us

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Patti,

Thank you so much for thinking of me. You are very kind. I am
doing fine, under the circumstances. My friends and family are
always near to comfort me. Aside from the fact that Beth rests
here in Atlanta, one of the main reasons we returned here with my
daughter was that my family and our friends were here to support
us. I do not know what I would have done without them.

I have responded to Mame. I would like to be a friend to her. I
hope to tell her some of the things my mysterious friend tells me
- it is a relief to just tell someone. I have given up on my
statement. Thank you for everything you did to help me. With
God's help, I will find a way, someday, to tell my story. For
now, it is hopeless. Oh how I love JonBenet. I miss her oh so
much. I want to just think of her and love her for now. I have
lost my faith in my efforts at present. I know I will regain my
faith again, in time. I need to rest.

I will make every attempt to stay in touch with you in the next
days. It will not be easy. I need all my friends close. Pray for
us, Patti. I have not stopped praying for you.

Love,
Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 15 Oct 1999 16:49:27 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: October 15, 1999

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I have contended, from the beginning, that a killer is at large
and has been allowed to seek out another child just like
JonBenet. The recent conclusion did not stand to cause direct
detriment to this family; however, a killer still lurks, posing a
threat to other children. This family might very well stand in
the path of this killer as was promised in a letter he authored.
Never was it the primary and only wish of this family to be found
innocent of this horrible crime. We wanted a killer to be brought
to justice for the sake of the world around him, as well as for
his own sake - so that he might be granted a chance to be
forgiven. To all those who feel cheated by the closure of the
latest attempt to seek justice; I assure you that this family
will never feel closure until the true killer comes forth.

It is my belief, as well, that this case will not move forward,
due in part to the fact that certain individuals with information
pertinent to this case are not being allowed to present said
information in a fashion that pleases all the parties involved.
Thus far, there are no more solid leads now than there were
almost three years ago. An unyielding listener might do well to
accept certain information through an approach that might not be
as conventional as is customary in such matters. I do not feel
that anyone involved in this case, whatever their capacity, has
"lowered" themselves to allow another to convey pertinent
information in the only way possible for that individual's safety
and for the safety of that individual's family. I would do
anything to convince all those involved in this case to please
listen in a way that you might consider unconventional. For the
sake of JonBenet, little girls like her, and this family - I
plead with you all to listen.

No amount of prosecution will bring our precious little girl
back. Had it been possible for me to sacrifice my freedom;
moreover, my life, I would have gladly done so to bring back that
precious child. Alas, such an act would not bring her back, just
as it would not bring her back to find her killer. However,
another little girl may possibly await a similar fate as did our
precious JonBenet - we must not allow this to happen. It is for
that reason that we all must do the best we can to seek out this
killer. This is not a time to hate and seek revenge - that would
consume too much time that could be spent finding a way to draw
out her killer. I pray for him daily - that he might be delivered
from this evil that consumes him; that he might come to the same
God I pray to and ask for His Holy Forgiveness.

Patricia Ramsey






Forwarded Message

Date: 18 Oct 1999 03:19:00 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: In Touch

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Dear Patti,

I hope you and your family are well. Through prayer, and the
support of friends and relatives, we are making it through this.
I hope my last mail to you explained plainly that I still have
every intention to pursue this. As I confirmed to you months ago,
my primary concern was not my indictment. Yes, it was a concern -
we were in ardent prayer, throughout the proceedings. Though I
can honestly say that I am relieved, I am also disappointed that
a killer still walks free. Then, the grand jury was only a phase
in this case. Now that it is over, it is time to get down to
work. My family and I are still doing everything possible to find
the
person who killed our child.

I hope you understand that my being JonBenet's mother does not
mean the authorities or the press will listen to me, concerning
anything about this horrible case. On the other hand, I have
always felt that the killer would listen to JonBenet's mother.

Thank you for your continued friendship. I will never forget it.

Your Friend,
Patricia





Forwarded Message

Date: 19 Oct 1999 01:30:56 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Danger Still Exists

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Patti,

I think the killer has a strange love for my child; hence, her
mother's words will touch him.

Yes, I know he watches me. I have been assured by him that he is
doing that. I have never caught him in the act of watching me. I
only take his word. I am referring to my mysterious friend.

I have tried so hard to recall anyone who might fit the
description of this man. My daughter was not shy. We had many
friends and acquaintances. The acquaintances are the group that
he would reside in; a group that contained a numerous
consistency.

I was not surprised by the results. I was relieved, yet
disappointed; but, I was not surprised. Nothing about this case
surprises me. Nothing positive can ever come of it, in the hands
of people who do not have the experience to handle it.

John knows this mysterious man exists. He doesn't know of my
desire to appeal to him.

What is Heidi saying about me? I think those who have their
little girls left to them should focus on protecting their own
child from this killer who still lurks. If JonBenet's killer was
still in Boulder, he might very well still frequent pageants in
search of another little girl like my own.

Patricia


**more...

 

Date: 20 Oct 1999 03:05:28 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Theory

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Patti,

Yes, that is my theory. No, I did not commission the printing of
that TIME article. Actually, you are really reading the words
contained in a letter sent by my mysterious friend, over a year
ago. Patti, I don't think I ever told you that his first contact
with me was through a letter sent to my parents and attorneys. He
sent the same theory letter to the police and Alex Hunter. They
all know about this man I refer to as my mysterious friend. I
know that must seem confusing to you. After reading the article,
you can surely see the power of his words. My theory was inspired
by that letter that he sent last year; the same letter that this
article was based on.

I am glad that the theory has been published; however, I wrote a
statement that contained something more than this theory. Maybe
the printing of the theory alone will suffice for now. Patti, I
was so close, just days ago, to getting my statement before the
public. I think it too has fallen apart. I am not speaking of
Mame.

I am glad this theory has been printed as accurately as it has.
It did not happen the way I wanted. I had nothing directly to do
with the article you speak of. You must know that. However, some
of my contacts in journalism may have done something for me
without my knowing it. Only two people hold my statement. Carol
is one of them. Oh how I miss her. She was the only journalist
who seemed to genuinely care about me. Mame wants to care. My
latest contact is undecided.

Stay close Patti. There is a possiblilty that my time here is
limited. The latest developments are not good.

Patricia Ramsey



Forwarded Message

Date: 20 Oct 1999 23:26:09 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Time

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Dear Patti,

I will write more to you tonight. The TIME article concerns me a
bit. I will tell you why tonight. Yes, a friend alerted me about
the article. You must know that I still do not read items about
this case. If I find out anything said, it is conveyed to me by
friends. Even then, they are very delicate about how they present
it to me. They know that I am very sensitive about media
coverage. It only causes me to get upset. This article is quite
different. It does not coincide exactly with the theory found in
my statement. Lou Smit and Carol spoke to each other last summer
when things were wonderful between us. I am certain that she told
him all about me but asked him to remain silent with me so as not
to make me uneasy that John and my family would discover that I
have been talking to this mysterious man. I had Carol's assurance
that she would not do anything to jeopardize my privacy. She was
wonderful. I miss her. I plan to speak to Mame tonight. I am
still in touch with a wonderful person who understands me. He and
I have been talkking for some time now.

Patricia



Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: normette@discover-net.net
Subject: letters 11/09/99-11/1/99
Date: Mon, 1 Nov 1999 20:37:30 -0600

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Forwarded Message

Date: 11 Oct 1999 02:55:59 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Short Message

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I am not upset with you for telling your friend about me. I will
contact her this evening. I appreciate your help. Thank you,
Patti. I will talk more to you after I contact this new friend.
Tell me as much about her as you can.

Patricia




Forwarded Message

Date: 11 Oct 1999 03:48:15 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Contact Made

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

A mail has been sent to Mame. My sources have confirmed that she
is, indeed, in Boulder. I told her that I just lost a very
wonderful journalist friend here. At the very moment I lost
contact with him, you sent her to me. I told Mame that maybe god
had his hand in this. I don't want to get my hopes up. Thank you,
Patti.

Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 13 Oct 1999 03:14:44 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Pray For Us

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

Thank you so much for thinking of me. You are very kind. I am
doing fine, under the circumstances. My friends and family are
always near to comfort me. Aside from the fact that Beth rests
here in Atlanta, one of the main reasons we returned here with my
daughter was that my family and our friends were here to support
us. I do not know what I would have done without them.

I have responded to Mame. I would like to be a friend to her. I
hope to tell her some of the things my mysterious friend tells me
- it is a relief to just tell someone. I have given up on my
statement. Thank you for everything you did to help me. With
God's help, I will find a way, someday, to tell my story. For
now, it is hopeless. Oh how I love JonBenet. I miss her oh so
much. I want to just think of her and love her for now. I have
lost my faith in my efforts at present. I know I will regain my
faith again, in time. I need to rest.

I will make every attempt to stay in touch with you in the next
days. It will not be easy. I need all my friends close. Pray for
us, Patti. I have not stopped praying for you.

Love,
Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 15 Oct 1999 16:49:27 -0000
From: "Ramsey" <ramsey@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: October 15, 1999

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

I have contended, from the beginning, that a killer is at large
and has been allowed to seek out another child just like
JonBenet. The recent conclusion did not stand to cause direct
detriment to this family; however, a killer still lurks, posing a
threat to other children. This family might very well stand in
the path of this killer as was promised in a letter he authored.
Never was it the primary and only wish of this family to be found
innocent of this horrible crime. We wanted a killer to be brought
to justice for the sake of the world around him, as well as for
his own sake - so that he might be granted a chance to be
forgiven. To all those who feel cheated by the closure of the
latest attempt to seek justice; I assure you that this family
will never feel closure until the true killer comes forth.

It is my belief, as well, that this case will not move forward,
due in part to the fact that certain individuals with information
pertinent to this case are not being allowed to present said
information in a fashion that pleases all the parties involved.
Thus far, there are no more solid leads now than there were
almost three years ago. An unyielding listener might do well to
accept certain information through an approach that might not be
as conventional as is customary in such matters. I do not feel
that anyone involved in this case, whatever their capacity, has
"lowered" themselves to allow another to convey pertinent
information in the only way possible for that individual's safety
and for the safety of that individual's family. I would do
anything to convince all those involved in this case to please
listen in a way that you might consider unconventional. For the
sake of JonBenet, little girls like her, and this family - I
plead with you all to listen.

No amount of prosecution will bring our precious little girl
back. Had it been possible for me to sacrifice my freedom;
moreover, my life, I would have gladly done so to bring back that
precious child. Alas, such an act would not bring her back, just
as it would not bring her back to find her killer. However,
another little girl may possibly await a similar fate as did our
precious JonBenet - we must not allow this to happen. It is for
that reason that we all must do the best we can to seek out this
killer. This is not a time to hate and seek revenge - that would
consume too much time that could be spent finding a way to draw
out her killer. I pray for him daily - that he might be delivered
from this evil that consumes him; that he might come to the same
God I pray to and ask for His Holy Forgiveness.

Patricia Ramsey






Forwarded Message

Date: 18 Oct 1999 03:19:00 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: In Touch

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dear Patti,

I hope you and your family are well. Through prayer, and the
support of friends and relatives, we are making it through this.
I hope my last mail to you explained plainly that I still have
every intention to pursue this. As I confirmed to you months ago,
my primary concern was not my indictment. Yes, it was a concern -
we were in ardent prayer, throughout the proceedings. Though I
can honestly say that I am relieved, I am also disappointed that
a killer still walks free. Then, the grand jury was only a phase
in this case. Now that it is over, it is time to get down to
work. My family and I are still doing everything possible to find
the
person who killed our child.

I hope you understand that my being JonBenet's mother does not
mean the authorities or the press will listen to me, concerning
anything about this horrible case. On the other hand, I have
always felt that the killer would listen to JonBenet's mother.

Thank you for your continued friendship. I will never forget it.

Your Friend,
Patricia





Forwarded Message

Date: 19 Oct 1999 01:30:56 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Danger Still Exists

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I think the killer has a strange love for my child; hence, her
mother's words will touch him.

Yes, I know he watches me. I have been assured by him that he is
doing that. I have never caught him in the act of watching me. I
only take his word. I am referring to my mysterious friend.

I have tried so hard to recall anyone who might fit the
description of this man. My daughter was not shy. We had many
friends and acquaintances. The acquaintances are the group that
he would reside in; a group that contained a numerous
consistency.

I was not surprised by the results. I was relieved, yet
disappointed; but, I was not surprised. Nothing about this case
surprises me. Nothing positive can ever come of it, in the hands
of people who do not have the experience to handle it.

John knows this mysterious man exists. He doesn't know of my
desire to appeal to him.

What is Heidi saying about me? I think those who have their
little girls left to them should focus on protecting their own
child from this killer who still lurks. If JonBenet's killer was
still in Boulder, he might very well still frequent pageants in
search of another little girl like my own.

Patricia




Forwarded Message

Date: 20 Oct 1999 03:05:28 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Theory

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Patti,

Yes, that is my theory. No, I did not commission the printing of
that TIME article. Actually, you are really reading the words
contained in a letter sent by my mysterious friend, over a year
ago. Patti, I don't think I ever told you that his first contact
with me was through a letter sent to my parents and attorneys. He
sent the same theory letter to the police and Alex Hunter. They
all know about this man I refer to as my mysterious friend. I
know that must seem confusing to you. After reading the article,
you can surely see the power of his words. My theory was inspired
by that letter that he sent last year; the same letter that this
article was based on.

I am glad that the theory has been published; however, I wrote a
statement that contained something more than this theory. Maybe
the printing of the theory alone will suffice for now. Patti, I
was so close, just days ago, to getting my statement before the
public. I think it too has fallen apart. I am not speaking of
Mame.

I am glad this theory has been printed as accurately as it has.
It did not happen the way I wanted. I had nothing directly to do
with the article you speak of. You must know that. However, some
of my contacts in journalism may have done something for me
without my knowing it. Only two people hold my statement. Carol
is one of them. Oh how I miss her. She was the only journalist
who seemed to genuinely care about me. Mame wants to care. My
latest contact is undecided.

Stay close Patti. There is a possiblilty that my time here is
limited. The latest developments are not good.

Patricia Ramsey



Forwarded Message

Date: 20 Oct 1999 23:26:09 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Time

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Dear Patti,

I will write more to you tonight. The TIME article concerns me a
bit. I will tell you why tonight. Yes, a friend alerted me about
the article. You must know that I still do not read items about
this case. If I find out anything said, it is conveyed to me by
friends. Even then, they are very delicate about how they present
it to me. They know that I am very sensitive about media
coverage. It only causes me to get upset. This article is quite
different. It does not coincide exactly with the theory found in
my statement. Lou Smit and Carol spoke to each other last summer
when things were wonderful between us. I am certain that she told
him all about me but asked him to remain silent with me so as not
to make me uneasy that John and my family would discover that I
have been talking to this mysterious man. I had Carol's assurance
that she would not do anything to jeopardize my privacy. She was
wonderful. I miss her. I plan to speak to Mame tonight. I am
still in touch with a wonderful person who understands me. He and
I have been talkking for some time now.

Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 22 Oct 1999 02:08:55 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Threats

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Dear Patti,

Thank you for your wonderful letter, Patti. I thank you for the
kind words you wrote. As I always said to Carol, let your heart
tell you what is right and what is true. I am so glad that my
honesty has paid off and will now bring us closer. I have missed
the times we once spent, talking of my child. I deeply appreciate
such a heartfelt response. Over these past months, since I have
come here and met people like you, Carol and Mame; I have come to
realize that there are people outside my family and circle of
long-time friends, who really care for me and want what's best
for our family. God will surely bless you as it is my prayer that
He will bestow his blessings upon you in abundance.

I did not know if you had heard of the recent threats we have
received. What can a mother say about such a horrible and sick
attack on my helpless child's gravestone. I would not imagine
anything like this has ever happened to another mother's baby's
grave. Patti, you know that her mysterious friend would never do
anything to hurt her grave. To him, that is hallowed ground. It
would make no sense as he is avidly, and has always been, on our
family's side. He responded violently to the attack on her
gravestone, making the comment, "Thank God her precious stone was
not permanently scarred." Of course, there is some activity
around the graveyard which is not conducive to his visits, I
would imagine. I would probably be wise to be more afraid of the
madman who did this to my child's gravestone than I am of
JonBenet's killer. Why would any person do such a horrible thing?
Please help me understand that? The gates of the graveyard are
supposed to be locked before dark each night. I do not expect
them to be locked any other time.

I am safe tonight. Thank you for worrying about me. I am sorry I
was not able to talk to you sooner. I knew you would worry if I
told you about the threats we have received. I should have known
this would make the news. Please stay in touch.

Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 23 Oct 1999 16:27:15 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Mail Problems

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Patti,

Due to the recent threats, there has been an extra step up in
security concerning this address. Unfortunately, due to this
change, mail sent to this address was not received if mailed
after midnight on Thursday through midnight on Friday. There is
no way to retrieve any mail sent during that 24 hour period. If
you sent mail during those times, please resend.

I wanted to talk to you yesterday but this problem prevented that
possibility. Please save all your mails in case I don't get them.
This step up in security could cause a series of problems - one
being that I don't get your mail. I'm sorry for all the trouble.
I will contact you as I get a chance.

Patricia


Forwarded Message

Date: 24 Oct 1999 03:43:20 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Carol

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Patti,

I am safe and doing as well as can be expected. Thank you once
more for you concern.

I did not know that you still talk to Carol. I am so tempted to
ask you to convey a heartfelt thought to her, but I will honor
her wishes to refrain from contact. I miss her very much. I agree
with you when you say she would have released my statement had it
not been for the pressures from her superiors. It was that very
pressure that caused me to make a split second decision,
resulting in a mistake that would cost me everything. May God's
will be done.

>From time to time, I use the term "mysterious friend" and "the
killer", synonomously. I did not mean to say that I am not afraid
of my daughter's killer. I did mean to say that there is a
possibility that the horrible person who desecrated my child's
grave is much more dangerous than is this myserious man I have
spoken of, unless, of course, he is the true killer.

I am not talking to a lot of people. I am opening up to Mame. She
is sweet. She reminds me of Carol and you. Thank you for sending
her my way.

Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 25 Oct 1999 02:05:15 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Closeness

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Dear Patti,

Thank you for your mail. This is the first mail I have received
since Saturday morning. I think the mail is all straightened out.
I hope so. I do not want to lose your and Mame's mail. May I
call her by her real name here? I am impressed with Mame. She
seems to care about me. I even made small talk with her about
Burke - something I don't recall doing with Carol. I try to keep
my family out of this. It is bad enough for me to be involved, as
you have shown your concern for me for good reason. I do still
talk to the stranger. I feel I must keep a tab on him. I feel
that, as long as he can express his love for JonBenet, he will
not be interested in other children. He is involved with so many
people, it would miraculous if he did not have another interest
in a child. My instincts tell me that he will not harm another
child or me; however, there are times when I doubt my instincts.

You mentioned that "As much as I like Carol, she lacked something
in the "emotional" attachment she had for you. Maybe she has the
heart of a reporter from doing that job so long, I don't know."
Did you mean that she did not care for me emotionally as much as
she should have? If so, I think you might be right. I will say
that, had she really loved me like a sister, she would not have
asked me to let her go and never contact her again. I felt
abandoned to deal with this situation alone. Oh Patti, I was so
devastated by that. You do know that I took the blame for the
failure of last summer. I feel it was all my fault. I wish I
could talk to you about it further. The last thing she said to me
was in effect, "I do not believe you are Patricia Ramsey, so no
longer wish to talk to you." Although I know who I am, I think
some people can lose sight of the matter at hand through such a
commitment to assure one's identity.

I have not heard from Mame today. I had hoped to since I finally
sent complete descriptions of my mysterious friend's character
and personalities. Recently, a journalist was very interested in
little things he has said to me. I simply sent a list of little
things he had said that I could recall. I have stopped hearing
from him. Patti, I think you are right that some journalists are
looking for a story. When I don't deliver what they want, they
walk.

I noticed your sweet signoff, "love". Thank you for that, Patti.
I want us to be close again, as close as we once were. I need
that now. I will consider your advice concerning my contact with
the stranger. He is close. I have never thought about whether he
thinks my husband knows about us or not. I believe he thinks my
family knows because he has made himself known to my parents. I
will say that he has not bothered them as has the press and
paparazzi. I really wish people would leave them and my child's
grave alone.

Love,
Patricia



Forwarded Message

Date: 26 Oct 1999 04:19:30 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: You Are Right

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Dear Patti,

Thank you for your wonderful mail. I will try to answer all your
questions.

I cannot answer for my family in regards to how they would
feel if they knew I was going against the advice of some of
the best attorneys in the country. I am beginning to feel
disappointed in myself. They would not be upset with me. We have
a strong and close family - all the way from my husband to my
sisters.

You are right when you say that this is too dangerous to handle
alone. The fact remains that I have handled it alone for over a
year. I also will not speak for my investigators. They know most
everything about this case. Lou Smit spoke the theory of my
mysterious friend in an article in TIME. I will not say if that
means he knows of his existence. I will say that he does NOT know
who this man is. We feel he is in Atlanta.

Thank you for worrying about me. You are right that this is
taking its toll on me. You are right that I am in deep despair
over the loss of my little girl. Maybe I have fallen prey to this
man. I never considered that I have done so.

You still do not know enough about him to understand why I
continue to communicate with him. You must consider that I am
also allowing him to visit my child's grave - the man who cried
when he found out that her grave had been desecrated.

Why have I accepted this person into my life? Did I really have a
choice. Let us consider the alternatives. I could have ignored
him - a man with information that is now public knowledge. I
could take your advice and shut him out abruptly now. I wonder
what his reaction would be? It is not that easy. As far as
tracking him down, I have done all I can do to track him down
with the exception of placing surveilance cameras at her grave.
Remember, he has openly communicated with the police, Hunter, my
attorneys, and even my parents. He is completely obvious yet
illusive and totally unknown. The information he has brought to
me has had an impact on this case. It is not so easy to close the
door on him now.

I would be glad to tell you more about this man. I will tell you
as much as I can tell you. Don't be scared. I do not think he
would hurt me at this point. I only fear his reaction if he
thought I had suspicions about him. He has no idea that I do. The
press has been so good at hiding that side.

I totally agree with you about Mary. Maybe I have heard from her
for the last time. I asked her to tell me who she is. I need to
know who she is and see what she has written about this family. I
cannot go any further without at least knowing who I am talking
to. I hope I have not destroyed things between us by asking her
who she is. I did it with all due respect. I am getting so close
to her. I have been hurt badly in the past. I pray that I have
not offended her by asking her to tell me who she is.

No, I have not heard from the other journalist after pouring my
heart out to him. I am surprised. I really thought he was the
perfect person to help. I will greet him in person as if nothing
has happened. I was counting on him. He has vanished from this
arena but will remain in my real life. Thank you for your
understanding. It means a lot to me.

My mysterious contact made himself known to my parents through
the initial letter he sent to me through them. They are not
afraid. I have diverted his attention completely away from them.
He has never mailed anything to him since.

I loved your letter. I am so sorry if I have destroyed something
by asking Mary who she is. I have grown fond of her. I would not
have her upset with me for anything.

Patricia Ramsey




Forwarded Message

Date: 28 Oct 1999 03:13:59 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Please Help

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Dear Patti,

Thank God you are on my side. Our fervent praying must continue -
even past the grand jury results. I have been warned for awhile
now that this was going to happen - that the State of Colorado
would not rest until our family is completely destroyed.

Oh Patti, I fear now that someone with my words may twist them
and insinuate that the man I refer to as a man who loved my child
in life; the man whom I refer to as my mysterious friend, is my
husband. God forbid such a horrible thing might happen. There is
another rumor that the man I speak of is my extra-marrital lover.
Patti, I have not told you the half of what has restrained me
from talking. Now, my concerns have deepened.

Let us separate our friendship from my friendship with Mary. She
got very upset with me because I did not understand why she could
not tell me her name. She told me I had to meet her halfway. I
HAVE met her halfway. I have told her my name and divulged
information about my mysterious friend that I have not divulged
to anyone but two other people. That, I think, qualifies me to
know who I am relaying such sensitive information to. I
appreciate you referring her to me, but she makes a lot of
demands on me to be a person who will not even tell me her name,
much less allow me to see what she has published about my family.
I did not ask her to confirm her name - I only asked for her
name.

My sister Pam told Carol that I did not have a computer; hence, I
could not be her sister. It always amazed me how she could not
understand that my sister was not aware of this secret. Let me
say this without actually saying it: If Carol asked me, in a room
with my husband, I would deny involvement myself. I do not want
my husband to know about this right now. I told you and Carol
that this was my secret. Carol could never understand that I
could not just blurt this information out in front of my husband
- not yet. That is why I take full responsibility for my failure
with her.

I need your advice. One of the two journalists who holds my
statement, has requested a secret meeting with me in Atlanta. I
have agreed to meet with him. I feel I am getting in over my
head. I told him I must finally tell John about my involvement
with this mysterious man since meeting this journalist will mean
certain publication of my statement. Patti, I am so afraid that
my mysterious friend might feel hurt at me and retaliate. I don't
know how I am going to get the courage to tell my husband at long
last. Help me Patti. Do you think this is a mistake? This
journalist is highly reputable. He has helped this family in the
past. He is not much on words with me here. I have been much on
words with him - sending him my statement and description after
description of my mysterious friend. I was going to go to Mary
about this but you and I are so much closer. I don't know who she
is, after all. She knows that I agreed to meet this journalist
and that I am afraid, but that is it. She said she would have
been glad to meet me - Who would I have asked; I have no name. I
want your advice. My coming out might cost me dearly. How can I
afford to risk it?

Patti, I am under as much pressure now, or more, than I was
during the grand jury hearings. Our family has received more
threats as of late. You are one of the few people who knows the
truth. Let us be closer than ever.

Love,
Patricia Ramsey




*more...

 

Date: 29 Oct 1999 02:34:54 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Nothing From Him

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Patti,

I have not heard from the journalist who wanted to meet with me
in person since he was contacted via e-mail yesterday. He has
never written very much to me. Then I suppose his job has always
been to listen. He is quite different here than he is in real
life. He just has nothing to say to me. He and Carol are the only
two people who have my statement, which inluded the theory you
read about in TIME. He is not the man you mentioned.

You do realize that talking to my husband about this is something
I would rather not have to do. I know he will be understanding. I
also know he will be terrified. I am so sorry that I have gone
behind his back; however I fear more that he will ask me to stop
talking to the stranger and drop this endeavor to present this
matter to the public.

I have some rather concerning news. My mysterious friend saw the
article in TIME. He is asking questions.

Patricia


Forwarded Message

Date: 30 Oct 1999 03:24:16 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Answers

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Dear Patti,

Sometimes mails here confuse me. I have to state and restate
things. Still, I feel people either don't read my mails carefully
enough, or they think I am a liar.

No, I have not heard from the latest journalist concerning our
meeting. I do not think he is as interested as I think he should
be. Please don't misconstrue that last statement as one that
means I want to "interest" anyone. I do not. There are enough
people "interested" in me and my family for the wrong reasons.

>Seems to me many things go on by people close to you that you
>don't know about. Is your family lacking in communication?

Patti, I am not here to discuss things you read in the headlines.
You already know that information. Our family releases statements
to the press to address such issues. If you want to discuss
current events, I will yield to that. My time here is limited. I
try to only focus on the most important things.

>I have heard somethings that make me wonder why you think your
>family does not know about your communications.

Why don't you just tell me what those things are? I can't respond
to this until you tell me what you are referring to. What have
you heard that leads you to believe I am lying?

>Why is your mystery man concerned over the TIME article? It
>should not bother him at all.

I could give you the detailed reasons if you wish. It is very
involved and very secret. It would further involve you. You have
stated that you are not feeling comfortable with this
arrangement. I can tell you, once you feel comfortable.

>I think you should arrange to meet with this man and have your
>investigator team on surveillance. This can not continue in the
>manner in which it has.

I assure you that I am doing all that is humanly possible to
handle this in a way I see fit. I could write volumes about the
reasons I am handling this matter as I am. Maybe I should say, I
could repeat those volumes.

>Mary has contacts with reputable news sources you know. She
>knows someone from NBC who she can get to help you and protect
>you.

How could someone from NBC protect me? Mary not only won't tell
me who she is, she won't tell me the names of the people she
knows at NBC.

I will contact Mary tonight. I told you in an earlier mail that
she does know about the journalist who wants to meet me. She
does not know the details.

>I feel like I am getting too many secrets from too many sources
>and I am starting to feel too involved in this.

Patti, I warned you about this when you first started talking to
me about this matter. I wanted to protect you from this
information but you insisted. I don't know what to do to remedy
this now. I suppose we could just stop talking. I will add that
you do not have to feel responsible for anything. This is my
responsibility. I would not appreciate anyone taking this
responsibility on themselves and doing something behind my back.
I know this man. He will disappear faster than the words proceed
from an informant's mouth.

>That is why I think this has to stop, all this secrecy and we
>have to start sharing information.

With whom, Patti? Certainly not with people who say they will
meet me but then leave me hanging for days on end. Certainly not
to people who cannot even give me a name so I know I am not
giving information to the tabloids - one of my biggest fears.
Shall I go to the state of Colorado - the same state whose
governor has made it clear that my husband and I murdered our
daughter? I could not help but think of a very irresponsible
comment made by a certain mayor who has since regretted it. Shall
I go to the Boulder police - the same people who threatened to
retain our daughter's body unless we cooperated? We have
cooperated with the police on several occasions.

>I think you should heed the Governor's advise, go to Boulder,
>tell them what you know.

Why were we not allowed to do that several weeks ago when we
offered it? I have nothing further to say about the governor.
Like I said, it would be easy to discuss current events with you.
That is not what this correspondence is about.

>What do you think?

It seems that no one cares what I think. The issue is always the
same. Please allow me to resend the statement I made just after
the grand jury retired.

Patti, I am not trying to be defensive. I usually allow my
friends here to say anything they please about me, with no
response. I have been criticized, reprimanded, had demands made
on me, pressured, threatened, and abandoned - all with the
confirmation that I deserved everything I have gotten. You are
the only person who ever said anything negative about the
journalists I have spoken to here. I am not focusing this letter
on you. I am just trying to explain some things. I had plans to
come here this weekend to talk of other things. I cannot ignore
your questions as I have in the past. I am sorry if the answers
are not what you were looking for. These have been very trying
times for me in the last few days. I've tried to tell you about
it. For instanceI told you just days after the grand jury ended
their efforts, that we are getting threats. You responded with
surprise because Mary and the rest of the press were not aware of
this. This was something our family was trying to keep private
until the incident at JonBenet's grave. I guess you can read
about those threats now. I have more to be afraid of now than
before. The wolves are at the door.

Patricia Ramsey




Forwarded Message

Date: 30 Oct 1999 04:42:35 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: More

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Patti,

I know this man very well. I know him because he has opened his
soul to me. I know what he is capable of. I know what he is not
capable of. He is a man of means. If, for a second, he thought I
was speaking of him in such a manner, he could easily escape to
another part of the world where he would adjust quite nicely. I
don't think he is playing games with me. He is very honest with
me. He's emotional and very much in love with JonBenet, even in
death. The purpose he gives me for communicating with me is that
I am the mother of his little princess. He says he is spiritually
connected to me through JonBenet. Patti, with that information, I
have nothing to offer to the police. But, he has offered
something to the police already; a step by step theory. It was
printed in TIME recently. Since he has seen the article, there is
a problem now.

The wolves, in this case, are my accusers; moreover, the enemies
of this family who wish for us what they consider swift justice.

Thank you for being so understanding with me tonight. I was so
afraid that I had upset you. I do not mean to ever hurt anyone
here. I have made some very good and very bad contacts here. I am
tempted to divulge the name of my good friend journalist who
seemed to fade away like my Carol. Patti, she was special to me.
I would not have my family know that I was close to a member of
the press, but Carol was different.

Yes, someday we will speak. As a matter of fact, I thought about
you today. I wanted to get your mailing address. I want to send
something special to you someday when we do not speak here
anymore. That day will come - I am so sorry that it will, but it
will come.

My son still attends school in his wonderful school in the
forest. We are not leaving Atlanta. Last summer, I told Carol
that one could pass by the front of our home and see right
through it. I used the expression "open as a barn". She never
responded to that. That was August; the month I made drastic
mistakes with her and ultimately lost her friendship forever.

>I was under the impression Mary did tell you alot about
>herself.What more is it you want to know?

Her name and her writings about this family.

Thank you for respecting my wishes not to take this upon yourself
to solve. I knew you would not do that.

When I said you were the only person who spoke against any
journalist I have spoken to here, I was referring to Carol. You
merely made the statement that she could have shown more care.

Patsy


Forwarded Message

Date: 30 Oct 1999 16:32:20 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Denial With a Purpose

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I am confused once more. I told you weeks ago that Pam denied
that this is me. I told Mary the same thing. You asked me to
explain it; I did.

Secondly, I did not ask you last night who told you this about my
husband, attorneys, and sister. I said, instead, that I know this
is Carol McKinley. I think she was looking for a way to let this
responsiblity go. She become illogical. It is simple - I have a
secret; hence, I do not want anyone in my family to know what I
am doing. Why? They would ask me to stop. Also, the investigators
would take over and do things their way. I do not want that. That
might be hard to understand, but it is the truth. Let me ask you,
have you ever had a secret - one that might prove dangerous to
yourself or your family? You have to understand what it is like
to be surrounded by people who take matters into their own hands-
namely my investigators, my attorneys, and even my family. I will
continue to keep this secret until I can figure out a way to make
this happen the way it should happen. My investigators,
attorneys, and even my family does not know this man like I do.
They would not be as patient and understanding as I am. Please
just trust me when I say, this man cannot be captured by the
police. This must be done in a delicate manner. This is the basic
reason I have not come forth to those around me.

What I am going to tell you might cause you great doubt. I don't
think it will since you have expressed your understanding. I must
confess that I have lied. Carol McKinley forced my hand. She had
promised that she would not contact my family - she did anyway.
She contacted my sister on more than one occasion. For a period
of several weeks, Pam told her a series of questions to ask me. I
was not ready to reveal my secret to Pam, my family, my
attorneys, or my investigators. I did not answer the questions. I
did not want to confirm my identity. Carol dumped me. Then, her
and I got back together. In the summer, I made the final attempt
to get my statement to her in a form that would be admissable to
her bosses. I won't say how that came about out of respect to
Carol. Carol, made one more effort to prove that I was NOT who I
said I was. This time, I was forced to lie. And so, you have left
off one from your list of people who deny that I am who I say I
am - you have left off my name. I denied my own involvement -
more than Carol could take. That was the end of that. I have not
lied to you and Carol; worse, I have lied to my own family. That
is why I sometimes feel that this is not worth it. The man I
speak to might just be a friend - a man who loves my daughter and
me. God forbid me to cause him the undue grief that I have had to
endure. God works in mysterious ways. There is a reason that my
story has not been heard.

As for Carol, I am very hurt at her. I did not know that she is
continuing to thwart my efforts here. I do not appreciate her
obstruction. As for the journalist who received a mail from me a
week ago to agree to meet him personally; I am baffled. Then
there is my new friend, Mary. I wrote to her last night. She
seems kind. I can't send sensitive material to a person who
cannot simply supply a name. You know and I know that the
tabloids would be beside themselves if they gained possession of
this information. I have to know names. The last two journalists
had no problem telling me who they were. I can't operate any
other way.

Patricia


Forwarded Message

Date: 31 Oct 1999 03:37:53 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: We Must Make Plans to Counter the Inevitable

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

Thank you so much for your wonderful mail. I am pleased that you
understand everything I am saying. I wish Carol would have
understood, but she did not. You have already helped me enough. I
thank you for your offer. I thank you for believing me. Thank you
so much.

I am safe, Patti. As long as I remain quiet, I will always be
safe. Thanks to the journalists I have met so far, I will
continue to be safe and silent.

You have thought of something that has never crossed my mind -
who will carry on when I am gone. I am thankful that you brought
this up. It is a good time to talk of such things - I might not
be here much longer. After all, my mission is over. I have found
nothing here that will help me. Recently, my contact wanted to
use the "ramsey" address to possibly lure the person who
desecrated my child's grave. One never knows who might contact
the ramsey address. I will not involve myself with it. Yes, my
mysterious friend is the originator of this address. He allowed
me access to the address when he started getting disturbing mail
flowing through the webpage that includes a tribute to JonBenet,
containing pictures of her grave. I wanted access because I hoped
for a lead to the killer. Later, I received threats as some
decided I might be JonBenet's mother. That is when I attained the
AXD address. Do you know what AXD stands for?

Returning to the point you so thoughtfully brought up: I had
hoped that if something happens to me, Carol McKinley who holds a
copy of my statement, might come forth. I think she will retain
that statement for the rest of her life. I do not know how John
would react to this, even after I am gone. My family is convinced
that I am not involved. However, I have a friend in real life who
knows about this; a friend who helps me with this mail. I cannot
do it alone. She helps me.

I must think of such things. You are so right. Patti, it's over.
I cannot believe it, but it is over. It is strange that you and I
talked prior to the journalists. Now, we have reunited to close
this chapter once and for all, together. I am glad I am not left
alone to close this awesome chapter that has held so much grief
and fear for me. I am left alone with this dark prince; to listen
to his poetic, flowing latin phraseology, revolving around the
object of his passionate affection. My baby is safe now - held in
the safe arms of Jesus. This man cannot hurt her. If I remain
silent, and caudle him; console him; allow him to express his
intense love for my little girl; I will remain safe; moreover, my
family will remain safe. How long can I carry this burden? As
long as I have life. I have no choice.

My connection with him is what your friend Mary fears - I am
certain of that. Only a few people here have had the courage to
divulge their names to me. Carol was one of those people. The
other journalist was the other person. Jim Collins was a fool and
another person who gave his name. I am not certain that I recall
your last name. Mary is not an exception - she is the norm. I
know a lot about Mary already. Patti, do you recall the
verification that was performed on Carol prior to my releasing
information to her? I sent some of the findings to you, performed
by my sources. Please don't tell Mary. It might cause her to feel
uncomfortable. I just can't talk to anybody. Especially not
concerning this very delicate matter. I only wanted to know her
name. I know almost everything else.

I am sorry that you have suffered at the hands of the doubters
who have been unpleasant to you. Thank you for standing by me.
Patti, I want to confirm my address with you. I will send a
series of numbers in separate mails to see if you have the
correct one. I do not want to send the entire address in one
mail. Don't you think we should make plans for the worse? We
might be abruptly interrupted here - it is inevitable.

Love,
Patricia


Forwarded Message

Date: 1 Nov 1999 02:15:33 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Dearest

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I noticed you began your letter to me with the word "Dearest".
Every time I see such a salutation, I think of my mysterious
friend - "Dearest" is his salutation as well.

I heard from Mary today. I really like her. She said she would
tell me anything I wanted to know about her. I asked for only one
thing - her name. She stated the same thing you stated; people
around me and this case, know of my existence but deny that I am
who I say I am. Long, long ago, I told you that it was my mission
to remain anonymous until the appropriate time to divulge my true
identity. I would say that everything is going as planned. I will
remained unscathed if, by some chance, some journalist prints
this information and the killer decides to retaliate against me
or my family. Patti, it will work just as I have planned all
along. The killer will be exposed; moreover, a plea to him will
be heard; my family and I will be safe.

I am almost certain that this man is in Atlanta. I do not think
he has harmed another little girl. You would have to speak to him
yourself to understand how I can feel confident that this is
true.

Please don't worry about my health. God knows all things. He
spared me from death. He is all powerful. He protects me from all
evil. I was speaking of my time here.

Do you wish for me to send my address? I can only do it in parts.

Alpha Xi Delta.

The friend who helps me, owns a computer. She is a trusted
friend. She did me a wonderful favor last summer. Of course, it
all blew up in my face. She had some ideas, as well as myself,
that seemed to make matters worse between Carol and I. Carol: a
person who distrusts me - why do I speak of her so. I must stop
talking about a person who has done the things she has done. I am
glad you feel better about me being safe among friends. Why do
you think my family has denied my connection to this extremely
dangerous situation?

I will let you know what Mary says to me. I cannot divulge any
sensitive information to her unless I can be assured that she is
not connected with the tabloids. I only want to know her name.

Patricia Ann


Forwarded Message

From: sleuthsister@juno.com
To: normette@discover-net.net
Date: Mon, 1 Nov 1999 07:18:15 -0700

Plain Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

i just got this....
love the threat of investigation. she already told you she
investigated
me, already. what do you think of this?

mary
----------------------------------
Mary,

It is nice to hear from you once more. As you already know, the
arrangement to meet with the latest journalist, fell through.
Actually, it just faded away. He never got back in touch with me.
I am a bit surprised. I have been heavily criticized for not
being more open about my identity. The moment I agreed to meet
someone in person; he loses interest. I have never been more
baffled and confused than I have been with the situation here.

Thank you for caring for me. I am, by nature, a caring person. I
have tried to exhibit kindness to all those around me. I have
never done anything to bring myself recognition - that goes
against the teachings of Jesus. I love my friends and family. I
love to give of myself so that they might be happy. I feel the
same way about you.

I do not want you to walk away. I would understand if you did
walk away - you would be in the company of some of the greatest
journalists of our time. I would like to stay in touch with you.
I would like it even better if I could tell you everything. I
will tell you what you can do for me once we take care of a few
things that we must face - things that I must face and share with
you.

You said you do not have a problem telling me anything about
yourself. I only want to know one thing - your name. That is it.
I have no desire to know anything past who you are. I have
resources at my fingertips who are capable of finding out
anything for me. I have no desire to employ them to find out
about you. No one is watching you. You are safe. If you do not
feel safe and confident telling me who you are, please tell me
what your fears are so I can lay them to rest forever.

I am glad you have told some of your trusted friends in the media
about me. You will find that they are not interested in meeting
my unconventional terms. I am not prepared to call a press
conference and tell the world about this. I am barely able to
fathom the release of a statement. I have yet to tell my husband
that I am, indeed, involved here. And here is where I must make a
confession to you. I know that the authorities, my attorneys, my
husband, my parents, and my sister know about this
correspondence. And I confess that I have denied my own
involvement. Mary, I have a secret. I keep it because I am not
emotionally prepared to open up to the previously mentioned
people. I am still in protection mode concerning this stranger.
He is not aware that I think for a second that he might be a
killer. I am afraid that some media person might decide to print
this information someday and my mysterious contact will read it.
That would be a tragedy, possibly. He has already seen an article
in TIME that has caused him to ask questions. All is well.

Yes Mary, you can listen to your heart. I am sorry that I have,
in the past, made it appear as though I wanted you to walk away.
I was merely providing an open door to you, so that you could
leave or stay. You have decided to stay. My energies and plans
here are probably tainted to the point that my credibility is now
nonexistent. I have thought of other ways to present this
information. The only alternative, from the way I presented this
to Carol and the other journalist, would be to have the stranger
himself come forth and talk to the media; better yet, the
authorities.

Patricia Ramsey

Forwarded Message

From: "Patti D. aka Cheesy" <cheesy21@email.com>
To: "Catherine E. Lettiere" <tuptup@epix.net>
Subject: 11/1 through 11/8
Date: Mon, 8 Nov 1999 09:59:46 -0600

HTML Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]


Forwarded Message

From: sleuthsister@juno.com
To: normette@discover-net.net
Date: Mon, 1 Nov 1999 07:18:15 -0700

Plain Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

i just got this....
love the threat of investigation. she already told you she
investigated
me, already. what do you think of this?

mary
----------------------------------
Mary,

It is nice to hear from you once more. As you already know, the
arrangement to meet with the latest journalist, fell through.
Actually, it just faded away. He never got back in touch with me.
I am a bit surprised. I have been heavily criticized for not
being more open about my identity. The moment I agreed to meet
someone in person; he loses interest. I have never been more
baffled and confused than I have been with the situation here.

Thank you for caring for me. I am, by nature, a caring person. I
have tried to exhibit kindness to all those around me. I have
never done anything to bring myself recognition - that goes
against the teachings of Jesus. I love my friends and family. I
love to give of myself so that they might be happy. I feel the
same way about you.

I do not want you to walk away. I would understand if you did
walk away - you would be in the company of some of the greatest
journalists of our time. I would like to stay in touch with you.
I would like it even better if I could tell you everything. I
will tell you what you can do for me once we take care of a few
things that we must face - things that I must face and share with
you.

You said you do not have a problem telling me anything about
yourself. I only want to know one thing - your name. That is it.
I have no desire to know anything past who you are. I have
resources at my fingertips who are capable of finding out
anything for me. I have no desire to employ them to find out
about you. No one is watching you. You are safe. If you do not
feel safe and confident telling me who you are, please tell me
what your fears are so I can lay them to rest forever.

I am glad you have told some of your trusted friends in the media
about me. You will find that they are not interested in meeting
my unconventional terms. I am not prepared to call a press
conference and tell the world about this. I am barely able to
fathom the release of a statement. I have yet to tell my husband
that I am, indeed, involved here. And here is where I must make a
confession to you. I know that the authorities, my attorneys, my
husband, my parents, and my sister know about this
correspondence. And I confess that I have denied my own
involvement. Mary, I have a secret. I keep it because I am not
emotionally prepared to open up to the previously mentioned
people. I am still in protection mode concerning this stranger.
He is not aware that I think for a second that he might be a
killer. I am afraid that some media person might decide to print
this information someday and my mysterious contact will read it.
That would be a tragedy, possibly. He has already seen an article
in TIME that has caused him to ask questions. All is well.

Yes Mary, you can listen to your heart. I am sorry that I have,
in the past, made it appear as though I wanted you to walk away.
I was merely providing an open door to you, so that you could
leave or stay. You have decided to stay. My energies and plans
here are probably tainted to the point that my credibility is now
nonexistent. I have thought of other ways to present this
information. The only alternative, from the way I presented this
to Carol and the other journalist, would be to have the stranger
himself come forth and talk to the media; better yet, the
authorities.

Patricia Ramsey

Forwarded Message

Date: 2 Nov 1999 01:00:51 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Does He Believe?

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

Your question is going to allow you to learn more about my
daughter's dark guardian. You asked, does he believe in God. That
is hard to answer. I will translate some things he has said to me
that might bring you understanding:

He once said that "his Goddess has inherited eternal life; She
waits in a garden of eternal peace for her mother and for me."
That might be interpreted as meaning that he believes in a Heaven
as he mentions "a garden of eternal peace". However, he refers to
JonBenet as "his Goddess". Maybe you can figure out if he
believes in God. My guess is that he does believe in God, though
he seems to have some things confused. Remember that I am
relaying a loose interpretation of what he really said. It is
sometimes very difficult to remember everything, though I have
tried to record as much as I can.

You might be a person attached to the tabloids? Nothing would
surprise me at this point. I do not understand why you don't
understand why I want to know who Mary is before I release
information to her. Patti, you and I have been friends for months
and I have yet to release my statement to you or in-depth
information about my myterious contact. There are only two people
who have held my statement in their hands. Yes, I have discussed
this stranger with you but I have not released a tremendous
amount of information. I think Mary is a great person. I would
love to be her friend, but I cannot release sensitive information
that might hit the supermarket tabloids tomorrow. As my sister
sometimes says, that would be the final nail in the coffin.

I deny, on behalf of my sister, Pam, that she is participating in
a forum of questions and answers for Ms. Bennett. However, you
must understand that my attorneys have no jurisdiction over what
my sister says. Pam has her own life. She is free to say what she
feels might be beneficial. That does not mean that she will be
acknowledged; especially not by the police. She is a good example
of a family member who felt she should speak out, only to have
her theory sit on a shelf, unconsidered. How am I to know that
the same thing will not happen to me? What am I saying? It has
happened to me already.

No, you never asked me about my sorority. Maybe you discussed it
with Carol. She was the only person who knew about it. I thought
you would be the second but I can see, you already knew.

I wrote to Mary last night. I have not heard from her yet. I was
afraid that you had not received the mail last night. My friend
told me that there was a problem getting through last night. Tell
Mary that she doesn't have to tell me her name. I would like to
be her friend. Of course, I must refrain from sending information
of the same nature that I sent to Carol and the other journalist.

As far as you are concerned, Carol has done nothing to me. Please
don't feel the need to defend her against me. I have had my fill
of that with another person I talk to who will not allow me to
voice my dismay that her journalist friend has decided to stop
talking to me right when I decided to meet with him about this
matter. I love Carol. I will always love her. I just don't like
to be abandoned. On the other hand, I appreciate everything she,
you, and everyone else has wanted to do for me. I appreciate your
listening to me and acknowledging what I have to say.

I hope to talk to you very soon. How are your kids? I hope all is
well with you and your family.

Patricia Ann


Forwarded Message

Date: 2 Nov 1999 15:42:24 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: More of the Same

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

I am so disappointed to, once again, get a reprimand from Mary.
She told me that the journalist who stood me up must have a good
reason. That is not what my friend would say. She said I cannot
see the forest for the trees. That is rediculous. She told me she
could sell my words a hundred times over to the tabloids if she
wanted to, while still remaining totally anonymous to me. That
makes me uncomfortable. She gave the name of one journalist along
with an e-mail address; however, she mentioned another NBC
producer of whom must remain anonymous once more. I have divulged
this information to two journalist. I know both their names. They
never hesitated to tell me their names. Something is not right
about this. I have a bad feeling about it. A mail was sent to her
just minutes ago. I am not willing to be scolded and blamed for
being stood up by a journalist. My family is in great danger. I
told Mary to re-read the ransom note. I ask you to do the same.
It is filled with promises - threats that still stand. As I told
Mary, the writer of the ransom note LIVES. I am through
explaining this.

Patricia Ann


Forwarded Message

From: sleuthsister@juno.com
To: normette@discover-net.net
Date: Wed, 3 Nov 1999 14:22:51 -0700
Subject: i got this, this morning

Plain Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

patti:

this came with this weird top part. had no visible name, time, etc. in
outlook 98...i have outlook pick up mail from yahoo. maybe it's
something i did. i hate this program. i'm just trying to find the
time
to organize all the addresses and important e-mails. yikes! what do
you
know about eudora? there is one more..i did not respond to this...i
couldn't get online...good thing, it made me mad....of course, as you
told me before....i received an apology awhile later. i'll send that
next.

mary



Received: from anon.lcs.mit.edu (18.26.0.254)
by mta131.mail.yahoo.com with SMTP; 2 Nov 1999 07:45:25 -0800
Date: 2 Nov 1999 15:34:12 -0000
Message-ID: <19991102153412.8265.qmail@nym.alias.net>
From: AXD <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: mamensadie@yahoo.com
Subject: Confused

Mame,

>i'm sorry to hear about the journalist who promised to meet you.
>i know you're so deeply involved in this, you must have trouble
>seeing the forest for the trees, at times. no good journalist
>would walk away from anything you have to say...without reason.

Once again, you see this as my fault? I promised to meet this
journalist. You seem to always feel the need to tell me how all
this is my fault. I repeat, I promised to MEET the last
journalist. There is NO good reason for this journalist to
completely ignore me.

I am not going to repeat my fears and concerns again. In short,
the day I tell the world that the man I have been talking to is
the killer will be the day that he will react. His reaction might
possibly be violent. While the world sees it as my responsibility
to come forth and turn this man in, I have a responsibility to my
family. To quote my mother, "I am damned if I do and damned if I
don't". Those around me are the ones who cannot see the forest
for the trees. They only see the outcome that suits them. No one
is considering the safety of my family. Why can't you all see
that we have already lost one of our children; nothing would stop
us from losing another. I DO NOT trust that the police can nab
this person in time. Do me a favor, please re-read the ransom
note. I am sure you have a copy of it. It is full of promises.
Those promises are aimed at my family. They STILL stand. Why
wouldn't they? The writer LIVES.

Patricia Ramsey

Forwarded Message

Date: 3 Nov 1999 02:59:55 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: My Dear

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

You asked if I think I will ever be able to find out if this
mystery man is the killer. Maybe someday, I will gain the courage
to ask him myself. No one else is interested in talking to me,
nor talking to him about this whole matter. Maybe I am the
person who must confront him, in person - not through this
horrible press. I think I am talking to the wrong people for help
anyway. I think I will shift gears and talk to someone I know who
works for the FBI. I think he would be the most logical person
about this. And he would not care who I am - he would only want
the truth. Strange how people can just drop this because they
become obsessed with my identity. The myterious man remains, yet
no one seems to care to pursue. Help me understand that.

What do I feel in my heart about him? My heart has many feelings
about him. His love for my daughter concerns me; at the same
time, the intensity of his love and devotion moves me. I really
don't care if anyone understands that. He is a gentle, kind,
loving, eloquent man. If he speaks the truth, he is loved by
many. To be honest with you, Patti, this is the saddest
situation. A man has entered my life - consoling me, speaking of
my daughter in poetic terminology, and I respond to him with
contempt. He has done no harm to me. He tells me how much he
respects me; moreover, he tells me how much he loves me.

The other side of me says this is not a normal situation. He has
said, on several occasions, that he loves JonBenet more now than
he ever did when she was alive. There have been variations of
that throughout our relationship. This leads me to believe I know
him. I have known so many people. JonBenet was surrounded by
people who loved her. It would not be rare for me not to be able
to recall one person who loved her. The thing that bothers me is
that I cannot recall a man like this one. How could I overlook
such a presence in my daughter's life?

What does my friend who helps me think? She thinks I am being
mistreated by the press. She does not see anyone's side but mine,
because she loves me and loves my family. She knows that it would
kill me to go through a loss like JonBenet again. She knows that
I might lose another child as a result of exposing her killer.
She has begged me to stop talking to anyone on the outside.
Though she is the person who helps me here, she has, since Carol
McKinley, pleaded with me to stop this. I think she is right.
Then, I contacted, on my own, the last journalist. She did not
want me to do that. I would not have, had I not known him. I
think he confuses our real life relationship with our
relationship here. I will continue to make a distinction as long
as a threat to my family's safety remains. He must understand
that. At this point, I believe he is the last person I will talk
to. That would make my friend who helps me, very happy. She knows
everything about my mysterious prince. She thinks he is a very
elaborate man. She also thinks he is extremely dangerous.

On Ms. Bennett, I will say the same thing about her that I said
months ago. I wish her no harm. I think she has a desire to
attach herself to us. She does this through methods that are
unusual at times. My sister is not anwering questions on her
forum or whatever it is she is doing. I have no way to stop her.
She is entitled to the same free speech that the tabloids enjoy.
As for my family and I; we do not read her material; however, we
do not read most people's material. I do not dislike Ms. Bennett.
I only wish she would not say that I am not who I say I am and
then say that Pam is talking on her forum - both are untrue.

It was nice to talk to you. I hope we can continue to talk like
this. You are one of the few left. I feel you will be my last
friend here before my stay comes to a close.

Love,
Patricia Ann



Forwarded Message

Date: 4 Nov 1999 03:30:21 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Soon to End

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dear Patti,

John's investigators have already used information that came
directly from my mysterious friend. The article in TIME documents
that. Of course, their perception of him is completely different
as they know him in a different way than I know him. I was on the
verge of telling the latest journalist more details about my
friend's reaction but time ran out. It was very important. I've
gotten accustomed to no one listening.

No, I still have not gotten the courage to tell my husband about
this. Once I do, I am prepared to drop this whole thing. I know
that he will not want me to place myself in the danger I have
placed myself in already. It might be too late for me to remove
myself from danger. I have not tried to deceive my husband. I am
merely protecting him. Also, I know he will ask me to desist
immediately. Once that happens, I must do as he says. I love him
very much. I am sorry that I did not go to him sooner. My dark
friend will not be happy if I disappear - Damned if I do and
damned if I don't.

A journalist could have brought my theory, which has already come
to pass, and my appeal to this killer, to the forefront. I need
to just wait until I talk to John. Maybe I should call a press
conference. I want to personally appeal to my child's killer. I
want him to listen to JonBenet's mother and come forth. Words are
very powerful.

As far as the authorities go, I have a very bad taste in my
mouth about them. They have hurt us. The police denied us of our
child if we did not yield to their demands. I do not trust them
anymore. Anyway, the authorities hold information submitted by my
sister Pam, to this very day. They have never responded. We can
see no proof that they have even reviewed the information that
she submitted. Patti, journalists are not the only people who
ignore me and my family.

I do not want to be forced into hiding. My son attends a
wonderful school in a very protective environment. Atlanta is our
home and also where our JonBenet and Beth are buried. We will not
leave Atlanta. My support system is here. My son has been through
enough without pulling him away from this school and disrupting
him once again.

I think my time here is up. Mary is gone. My sweet Carol left a
long time ago. The latest journalist is confused with me because
I cannot blurt out my involvement with him here in front of those
who do not know my secret. Simply put, no one believes in me
anymore except you and a couple of other people. Then there is
the occasional mail from strangers who ask if I am JonBenet's
mother. They all come from the website you know about. I only
wish the monster who defaced my baby's grave would respond to me
through that site, which was the wish of my mysterious friend.

It is nice to talk to you. My friend who helps me has saved all
the correspondences here in case something happens to me. I have
asked her not to place herself in harm's way for me. My dark
friend does not know about her. Carol was terrified of him. I
have asked both journalists to talk to him. Both have turned that
offer down. I do not blame them.

Patricia Ann


Forwarded Message

Date: 4 Nov 1999 21:26:53 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: How Disturbing

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

Thank you for that disturbing information. I have composed a rebuttal
to Ms. Bennett's attack on this address. Will you post it on every forum
she has sent such messages on? It is waiting and addressed to "whom it
may concern". It is merely a confirmation that no mail has been sent
from this address bearing the name "Patricia" or "Patsy". It further
states that tampering with mail by adding such words constitutes legal
recourse for the owner of this address.

I will further respond later. No no, the man who owns Find A
Grave is NOT my mysterious friend.

I will say much more later.

Patricia

Forwarded Message

From: sleuthsister@juno.com
To: normette@discover-net.net
Date: Sat, 6 Nov 1999 18:29:49 -0700
Subject: here's last night's letter...

Plain Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

let me know what you think about this?

Dear Mary,

Your letter was very intense. I must say that I am a speechless,
to say the least. I do not know how to respond. I knew that there
was suspicion in certain circles. Now, I can see how believable
it must be as a result of your intense response. You can now see
how this would affect my sweet husband. You can also see how the
public would perceive my connection with a mysterious man who was
in love with my little girl; a man who also loves her mother, and
would make no qualms about it if confronted. The first time I was
asked this question here was a few months back. My response was
that of shock. I was astonished that anyone would come to such a
conclusion. I do not, at all, take offense to your response. I
regret that I have said anything here to lead you to believe that
my dark friend is my lover. I would have an even deeper regret if
my husband and family would ever be led to believe the same.

My mysterious contact is a charismatic, handsome, gentle, kind,
patient man. I would imagine he has plenty of female friends. He
is usually surrounded by people; by young, attractive females -
I'm sure. He is a man who is loved by most everyone who meets
him. His charisma comes not from his wealth; not from his
educated background; not from the fact that he is well traveled
and cultured - instead, it comes from the fact that he has a very
intriguing personality that draws everyone to him. He is a
charming young prince.

With that all said, how can I convince myself; moreover, the
world, that such a perfect man could commit such a horrible
crime? A man who, no doubt, would have treated my daughter like a
princess; according to him, a fact. And maybe, that is all he did
to her - only having treated her like the Goddess he now worships
in death.

Please Mary, tell me all about the spiritual connection you have
with me. I share a spiritual connection with several in my life.
If I could say this to you and only you, I share an intense
spiritual connection to Beth and my JonBenet. I feel their
presence more sometimes than others. Sometimes I feel as though I
could reach out and touch JonBenet - she seems so close.

When you tell me that your heart breaks for me, I feel a
closeness to you. Though several here have shown great empathy,
your words touch me. I am so pleased that I can touch you with my
words. It is when I speak of my child's life and death that my
emotions seem to pour out through my words. Had any mother gone
through the loss of their best friend in this world as I have,
they would be able to relate to this.

At this time, I can only receive mail from you here. I fear my
husband or family might get your letter if delivered to my home
address. I do want you to have my address; however, do not send
even fragments of my home address in a mail here. I will send it
to you, myself. I would rather send it to you in fragments, under
separate covers. Unfortunately, my latest journalist friend is
trying to contact me via phone. I told him I would not discuss
this matter before my husband and family. He persists in attempts
to call me. I must contact him and inform him once more that I
cannot talk about this via telephone. Mary, it is my dear old
friend Michael. Please don't tell anyone. He is simply the best,
but he is getting very confused with this whole situation. I am
sorry that I must deal with this matter in this fashion but I
have no choice.

I welcome you to tell me everything about yourself here. I
promise you that I will never release any information that you
will share with me. I am very confidential with things my friends
share with me. You don't have to worry about anything like that.
Thank you for wanting to share everything about yourself with me.
I am honored. I am also listening. Mary, I have nothing but
respect for you and everyone else here who is trying to help me.
I would never do anything to hurt you. Furthermore, I have never
done anything to hurt those who have abused me here. Why then
would I do anything to hurt my sweet new friend.

Mary, you do not have to ask for my forgiveness for confronting
me. There is nothing to forgive. If forgiveness were in order, I
would graciously grant it to you. For through my forgiveness, so
too am I forgiven of my sins through the Lord Jesus Christ.

Patricia Ann

Forwarded Message

Date: 7 Nov 1999 05:36:11 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Silence

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Patti,

You have been a trusted friend for awhile now. Please tell me why
Mary has decided to stop talking to me. I really opened up to her
in my last mail, which was sent two days ago. I also told her the
name of the last journalist I sopke to. Now, I have heard nothing
from her. I must clarify some things with her.

PR



Forwarded Message

Date: 7 Nov 1999 21:23:43 -0000
From: "AXD" <axd@nym.alias.net>
To: cheesy21@email.com
Subject: Important Mail

Text Attachment [ Scan and Save to Computer | Save to Yahoo! Briefcase ]

Dearest Patti,

I am sorry that I have not written sooner. There are certain
things that are happening that have caused me to deliberate more
carefully on my responses here. I am confused about various
issues that might affect my answers to certain questions posed
here. I am sorry to be so vague. I really don't know how else to
describe this.

Concerning my contact with you, past this mode of communication,
I am conscientously considering ways that my relationship with
you and the others can sustain an inevitable, abrupt
interruption. My friend, whom has assisted me thus far, might be
the answer to this dilemma. I have hesitated to place her in
harm's way, though you and my other confidants here are no threat
to her. She knows of you already - it would be quite impossible
for her to avoid it. I will make no promises but I will assure
you that I care about the perpetuation of our communication - I
will try my very best.

I do not believe that either journalist would intentionally
embellish either of my statements. I DO believe they might force
my hand and present it to me in an open interview. If, at the
time of such presentation, I have not had a chance to discuss
this matter with my husband beforehand; I will be left with no
choice but to deny my own words. Before you respond to this,
please understand that such an option would be deplorable to me.
I pray that neither of these journalists will do such a thing to
me, though I fear that one of them might. Unfortunately, both
have made attempts to force my hand - I have had no choice in the
past but to react. It is for this very reason that Carol
responded to me as she did. If this were not a very delicate and
complicated matter, I would not have to operate under such covert
conditions; furthermore, I could call an open press conference
and verbalize my statement live. To further address your concern,
I retain the proper documentation that would refute any
embellishment that might take place. I can see the importance of
your suggestion to place this document in the hands of one whom
might speak on my behalf someday, in the event that I am unable
to speak for myself.

No, I have not sent signed e-mails to many recipients. The AXD
address has been used with you, Carol, and now Mary. Ms. Bennett
is merely looking for favor from my sister, particularly, by
launching this latest attack. A statement was prepared to be
released on the forums but I decided that it might be best not to
respond. It said the following:

BEGIN

To Whom It May Concern,
On Behalf of "ramsey@nym.alias.net"

This is to confirm that messages from this address:
"ramsey@nym.alias.net", have NEVER been posted or mailed with the
name "Patricia" or "Patsy" as a signature. Furthermore, it has
never been implied that the sender of any such message or post
has been authored by any member of the Ramsey family. In
addition, I would strongly advise those who are tampering with
messages by adding such signatures, to cease and desist
immediately. It is the right of the owner of this address to take
legal recourse if such false accusations are made. Most
importantly, attempts to contact the Ramsey family, their
immediate family members, or friends, will be considered an act
of harassment - illegal in the state of Georgia and punishable by
law. All forms of communication, including and not limited to
telephone calls, letters, or electronic mail sent to any of the
above mentioned parties, will be referred to the offices of
Haddon, Morgan, and Foreman in Colorado, and the office of L. Lin
Wood in Atlanta.

ramsey@nym.alias.net

END

This statement may need some editing before I give you
permission to release it. I am not sure that it would serve the
best interest of this endeavor to post such a rebuttle. I am
confused as to how I should proceed. You know the forums better
than I do. What do you think I should do? Patti, why does this
woman want to jeopardize my efforts here?

Yes, my myterious friend has been to JonBenet's grave many times.
He has proven his visits by describing particular physical
characteristics that coincided with the facts. I will only say
that I know what he looks like from his descriptions - that is
all I need to say at this point. The last journalist pressured me
for specifics concerning the ways I communicate with him. I do
not feel I must divulge everything about my connection with this
man, at this time. Whether I have spoken to him or only read his
words; whether I have seen him or only know of him from his
descriptions: at this point, is a matter I wish to remain silent
about.

Many things about my friend make me uneasy - mainly, his
illusiveness; moreover, the fact that I do not know whether he is
the killer or not. The fact that he loves me doesn't make me
uneasy. You would have to know him as I know him to understand
why I say this. After understanding his intense love for my
daughter, it is natural to understand that he would love her
mother.

I do not know if he would talk to either journalist. I would have
to convince him of a reason to speak to them first. I came very
close to bringing up this issue with him when I was talking to
Carol. Since she always voiced her lack of interest, I never
pursued the issue further. I have to admit that I was relieved in
one way while let down in another way. It would have given me a
chance to have some assistance in dealing with this situation. I
am, after all, totally alone in dealing with this.

Thank you for telling me what was going on with Mary. I tend to
get concerned, especially when I reveal sensitive information
and receive no response for days. I never know how someone might
react. Mary is a lovely human being. She attentively reads my
words, and responds conscientiously. If you talk to her, you are
welcome to read this mail to her. I hope to hear from her and you
soon. Thank you for your patience.

Patricia


**let me see if I have anymore...

 

okay... that's it!

 

Oh My God.

 

It would be great if someone could analyse the writings. This person just HAS to have been posting on the forums.

 

Thank you Niner for posting these, now I will go and start reading them, and Probably will continue with my work around the house in between. Too hot to go outside, 91 deg. F here. With the humidty - 104 deg. This will be interesting for me today. I have read some of them before, but not all of them.


Jay, Delmar England analyzed the Patricia letters and named Jameson as the author.

http://www.geocities.com/Area51/nebula/9337/england.html



<CENTER>

DELMAR ENGLAND COMMENTS ON THE "PATRICIA LETTERS:

The Search
</CENTER>

The investigation began in an indirect way long before I was aware of the letters and LW. In earlier Internet research for other reasons, I covered a vast volume of related material which served as a ready made reference while examining the letters and the causal writer. It is from memory and additional research that I have reached my conclusions. During the investigative process, I conservatively say that I looked at several dozen potentials. Many were briefly examined and quickly dismissed; others were looked into in much detail. When the dust settled, one and only one stood out.

JAMESON.
At least, that's one of the names she uses.
​

 

Thank you, Elle, for posting the link to Delmar's analysis. I hadn't read these letters before and they hit me like a ton of bricks. WHOEVER wrote them is twisted, IMO. And kinda ... gay, not that there's anything wrong with that.

It's 100F here with 108F "feels like" with the humidity. (I always wonder - feels like to who???) So I will stay inside as well.

 

Oh, thank you so much, Niner. I've never read the Patricia letters myself, as it was pretty much thought by all who talked about them to be a hoax by the time I showed up on the forums. There was so much else to learn, I never got around to it. So this will be fun to read. It will take me a bit, but while I'm working through it, I will say one thing about the first two sets you posted: definitely NOT Patsy Ramsey.

Thanks again! :foshizzle

 

"...a split second decision that would cost me everything.." , eh?

That would be what killed an innocent. A split second decision...or is it called a head wound followed by a hypoxic incident?